Who Says You Can't Go Home
by KittyLikesToScratch
Summary: Grey's & Private Practice. Someone from their past makes Addison & Derek come to some surprising realizations. What happens when you realize that you once had everything you ever needed? ADDEK.
1. Wishful Thinking

So. I'm back with another story. Which is actually _not_ the one I promised you guys when I ended the last one. Sorry! I was working on that one, and then I got this idea. So I've been putting off homework lately by writing it. I am still working on the other one, so I will start getting that up as soon as I can. But school takes priority, as much as I wish it didn't.

Anyway. This story starts out after the last episode of _Private Practice_ where Addison kisses Pete (In Which Charlotte Goes Down the Rabbit Hole) and during part of the _Grey's _episode from last week (Kung Fu Fighting). Everything after those episodes is not relevant. Oh, and the name of the story is the title of a song by Bon Jovi.

In case it's not obvious, I own nothing related to _Grey's Anatomy_ or _Private Practice_. Believe me, if I _did_ own them, I would be doing things a little bit differently. Starting with having Addison and Derek in the same city... grrr.

I think that's it. Read.

* * *

_**Chapter 1  
**__**Wishful Thinking**_

Today was going to be a good day.

This is what Addison told herself that morning. Today was going to be a good day. Today she would not have to tell a patient that she had a terminal illness. Today she would not have to talk said patient into not leaving her husband and giving up on everything she ever wanted. Today she would not have to give a speech about how woman should have her whole life when it killed her that once upon a time, she herself used to have _her_ whole life. And today… today she would _not_ kiss a man who was clearly not interested in anything but a good time. She deserved more than that.

She got ready for the day and headed off to work. She sat in her car for a few minutes after pulling up in the parking lot, repeating her mantra in her head and vowing that today _was_ going to be a good day. No matter what.

Walking inside, she realized that besides her, the only two people who were already here were Dell and Pete. She _could_ be a friendly co-worker and go say "good morning" to Pete… but after last night, that didn't exactly fit well with her current plan for the day. So instead, she decided to go into her office and pretend to look over her schedule until Naomi, Sam, Cooper, and Violet arrived for the usual morning meeting.

She picked up the paper and sat down at her desk. Two patients. She had _two_ patients scheduled the whole day. Both just routine check-ups.

Today was going to be a _boring_ day.

Setting her schedule down on her desk, she looked around the office, thinking about how different her life was compared to what she thought it would be like. When she had accepted Naomi's job offer, she hadn't fully taken into consideration the fact that co-op medicine was vastly different than working at the hospital. Sure, she knew that it would be slower-paced, but she didn't realize how much she would miss the fast-paced environment where she had to be at the top of her game every day. And the cutting. She definitely missed the cutting. Surgery was her forte. And boy, did she miss it.

"Hey," Naomi's voice startled her back to reality.

"Hey," Addison replied.

"So…"

"So… what?"

"You kissed Pete last night."

"Yeah, I vaguely remember something to that effect," she replied sarcastically.

"Care to explain?"

"Not particularly."

"Addison, I'm saying this because I'm your friend, and I care about you. Pete is not the commitment kind of guy. He hasn't had a relationship since Anna died. And quite frankly, I don't think he wants one. He's a good guy… I just don't think he's the kind of guy for you. Do you get what I'm saying?"

Addison was annoyed. She didn't need Naomi to tell her something that she already knew. Something that Pete had already told her himself. So she said bitterly, "What happened to me telling you that I don't need you to take care of me?"

"I'm _not_ taking care of you. I was just… okay, fine. I'm taking care of you. But Addison, what's so bad about that?"

"What's so bad about it is that you feel this need to protect me from things that I _don't_ need to be protected from. I'm a big girl, Nae. I can take care of myself, despite what my past track record might say."

"Addie… if you want to talk about anything… like De--"

"No," she cut her off. "I don't. It's over and done with, and there's no need to relive the past."

"It's just that he was a huge part of your life for so long, and you haven't said a word about him since you've been here."

"I've moved on. Okay? End of discussion." Addison glanced out the window behind Naomi. "It looks like everyone else is here."

She got up and walked past Naomi out of her office.

- - - - - - - - - -

It was 11:45 am, and Addison had already finished with her scheduled patients for the day. And she was bored.

Wandering out to the lobby, she saw Dell blatantly staring at Naomi, who was walking a patient out. She almost felt bad for the guy. It was pretty obvious that he worshiped the ground Naomi walked on. But seriously, he didn't stand a chance in hell. No matter how many cakes he had his grandmother bake.

Addison rolled her eyes at him and walked into the kitchen.

"You're avoiding me."

She hadn't seen Pete in there. Damnit.

"No, I haven't. I had patients."

"_And_ you've been avoiding me."

She sighed and rolled her eyes as she walked over to the fridge.

"So are we just going to pretend that last night didn't happen?"

"No. I kissed you, and you're not interested in anything more."

"Well, I wouldn't say _that_."

"There's really nothing else to talk about," she said, ignoring his remark. "You know I'm the marrying kind, and I know you're not."

"Addison, I--"

"On second thought, I think I'm going to go out for lunch."

Today was definitely not going as planned. Not at all.

- - - - - - - - - -

"I'm going out," Addison said as she poked her head into Naomi's office. "Wanna come?"

"I have a patient in an hour."

"Okay. Fine. But just be aware that the man-child will probably be watching your every move if you stay here."

"I'll get my purse."

Ten minutes later, the two were sitting at an outdoor café a few blocks away from the office. Addison absently stared off at the ocean, only half hearing what Naomi was talking about.

"Addison? Are you listening to me?"

"What? Yeah. Of course."

"Okay, what gives?"

"Nothing. I'm fine."

"I know you better than that. Spill."

"Today was supposed to be a good day. I told myself that it would be. And all I can think about is that stupid kiss."

Naomi opened her mouth to say something, but Addison cut her off.

"Before you start, let me just say that I knew what I was doing. I don't need to hear another lecture on how Pete isn't the commitment kind of guy." She sighed, frustrated. "You know, this isn't really even _about_ Pete."

"What's it about then?"

"It's just… yesterday… talking to Angie… telling her that a person should get to have everything they want… I felt like such a hypocrite. How can I tell someone something like that when most of the time I feel like there's some big, cosmic force keeping me from getting everything _I_ want… like the reason I'm alone and childless is because of everything wrong I've done the past few years. I mean, I _had_ the opportunity to have it all, and I just threw it all away."

"Addison. You can't think that way. It's not good. It's not healthy."

"I know. But still…"

"Listen, you _are_ going to find someone. You _are_ going to get your whole life. It'll happen."

"You think?"

"I _know_. And I'm your best friend. I wouldn't lie to you."

"You already did," Addison pointed out, remembering Naomi's little speech about absolutely no fertility potential.

"It was a one-time thing. Won't happen again."

"You are so full of shit. But thank you."

"You're welcome," Naomi said with a smile. "Let's order now. I'm starving."

- - - - - - - - - -

"Hey, Dell, where's Naomi?" Pete asked. "I need her to swing by and see my patient."

"She went out to lunch with Addison. They should be back soon. She has a patient scheduled in twenty minutes."

"Okay. When she gets back, let her know I'm looking for her."

Dell nodded and went back to the paperwork he had been working on.

A few minutes later, he heard the elevator door open. He jerked his head up from his desk, hoping it was Naomi coming back from lunch early.

The doors opened, revealing a person that Dell had never seen before. She was tall with long, dark auburn hair. She had a familiar appearance, but he was sure she had never been to the practice before.

She walked off the elevator and strolled right past the reception desk without a second glance.

"Uh, excuse me?" he called after her. "Can I help you?"

"Nope," she replied casually and continued on down the hall.

He followed behind her, wondering just where she thought she was going. A second later, she opened the door to Addison's office and went in, taking a seat at her desk.

"Do you have an appointment? Because you're not really supposed to be back here without one of the doctors."

"It's fine," she replied simply. "Addison won't care."

"Actually, it's--"

"You have a patient," she said, pointing at the front desk.

Dell turned around, seeing that there was indeed someone at the desk.

"Don't go anywhere."

He went back to his desk and got the patient checked in and escorted her to the exam room, assuring her that Naomi would be there in just a few minutes.

As he returned to front to pull the woman's chart, the elevator doors opened, and Addison and Naomi stepped out.

"Hey, Dell," Naomi greeted him.

"Hey. Your patient is ready to go in exam #1," he said, handing her the chart. "And Addison, there's someone in your office."

She looked confused. "Who? I'm not expecting anyone."

"I don't know. She just strolled on in there and wouldn't leave."

"Okay, thanks."

Addison walked the short distance to her office and stopped in her tracks when she saw who was sitting in her chair.

Today had just taken a really unexpected turn.

"Teagan. What are you doing here?"

* * *

You know the drill.

Review.


	2. Sunshine Go Away Today

Glad you guys seem to be liking this so far. Fair warning – this week is going to be a busy one with school, so I wanted to get this up before I get buried in homework. I have started the next chapter, but it could be a week or so before I get it finished and posted.

Ready, set, read.

* * *

_**Chapter 2  
**__**Sunshine (Go Away Today)**_

"Teagan. What are you doing here?"

"Good to see you, too."

"You know I'm happy to see you," Addison said. "It just would have been nice to know ahead of time."

"Yeah, just like it was nice to receive all those phone calls and e-mails from you over the past year and a half. Oh… wait… that's right. There were none. Unless you count the ten-minute call on Christmas, which I don't."

"Teagan—"

"I e-mailed you, I called you. I had some very meaningful conversations with your voicemail. That was fun."

"Don't even start, Teag. You have no idea what the past year has been like for me."

"And whose fault is that? I would have been there for you, Addison. I would have helped you as much as I could."

Addison sighed. "I don't know what to say. I'm sorry. I've had a really rough year."

"Yeah, well… so have I."

- - - - - - - - - -

Naomi and Violet were in the kitchen when Pete walked in.

"Hey, Pete, you still need me to see that patient of yours?"

"No. She left."

"Oh… okay," Naomi replied as she and Violet watched Pete pull things out of the fridge and then put them back, apparently confused as to what he was actually looking for.

"What's with you today?" Violet asked. "You're being weird."

"I'm not being weird."

"You are," Naomi said. "It's Addison, isn't it? She's getting to you."

"She is _not_ getting to me."

"Uh-huh…"

He was silent for a minute and then asked, "You don't happen to know if she has plans for dinner tonight… do you?"

"Don't do this, Pete," Violet said.

"Do what?"

"Make her think that you're interested when you aren't," Naomi interjected.

"What makes you think I'm not interested?"

"She wants the whole package. And you're not going to give it to her."

"It's just dinner. Dinner doesn't translate into a lifetime commitment."

He left the kitchen and walked toward Addison's office with Naomi and Violet trailing behind him.

"Pete, come on," Violet said as he came to a stop just outside her door.

Addison had her back turned to the door and hadn't yet noticed them congregating outside.

"Who's that?" he asked, pointing at the girl sitting behind Addison's desk.

"I don't know," Violet said, confused. "I've never seen her here before."

"Oh, boy…" Naomi said.

"What?"

"That's Teagan."

"Who's Teagan?"

Naomi sighed. "Addison's sister."

- - - - - - - - - -

"What's going on, Teag? Why are you here?"

"Just… needed a break. Thought I'd come visit you… see what you've been up to the last few years."

Addison put a hand on her hip and stared her down.

Teagan averted her eyes, not wanting to look at her sister.

"Stop looking at me like that. It's creepy."

"Does Dad know you're here?"

Teagan shrugged. "I left him a note."

"What about your mom?"

"Oh, please. Like she cares where I am."

"She'd probably care if she knew you were with me."

"Well, too bad. Here I am."

"And?"

"And what?"

"There's more that you're not telling me."

"Look, can I stay with you or not?" Teagan asked, annoyed with her sister. "Because if not, I won't waste any more time here."

Addison sighed. "Of course you can stay with me."

"Thank you," Teagan said quietly. She looked behind Addison. "I feel like we're on exhibit at the zoo."

"What?"

Teagan pointed behind her. Addison turned around to see Naomi, Violet, and Pete gathered outside her office. She walked over and pulled the door open.

"What are you doing?" Addison said, glaring at the three of them.

"I was just wondering—" Pete began.

Naomi cut him off. "If you enjoyed your lunch today. Which you did. See? Told you, Pete. Don't you have a patient?"

"Real smooth" he said. He took her hint, though, and turned to go back to his own office.

"I've got… uh… something to do…" Violet said as she left, too.

"What's your sister doing here?" Naomi whispered.

"I'm not exactly sure."

"Is she staying?"

"I guess so. For a while, at least."

"If you're going to talk about me, could you at least speak up?" Teagan called from Addison's office. "It's hard to hear you when you whisper like that."

"Hi, Teagan," Naomi said, pulling Addison down the hall away from her sister. "Okay, what's going on?" she said once they were out of earshot.

"I don't know, Nae. She just showed up here."

"Are you okay with that? I mean, you haven't had a whole lot of contact with your family in… years."

"I kind of have to be, don't I? It's not like I can just throw her out on the streets."

The two women stood together silently for a few seconds, unsure of what to say.

"Well… you don't have any more patients today, so why don't you just take the rest of the afternoon off and deal with… this."

Addison sighed. "Yeah, okay."

"That guy at the desk is leering at you," Teagan said bluntly as she approached Addison and Naomi.

"Yeah, I know," Naomi said as she walked back to her office.

"So, what's going on? Plotting the easiest way to get rid of me?"

Addison ignored her sister's remark. "Go get your stuff."

Addison watched Teagan's retreating figure, wondering to herself why her sister chose to come here, of all places.

Tonight would certainly be interesting.

- - - - - - - - - -

Later that night, Addison and Teagan were sitting on Addison's deck, watching the ocean and finishing the last of their dinner in silence.

After discovering that, except for clothes, Teagan didn't have much with her as far as essentials, the two made a quick trip to the store and then picked up Chinese take-out on the way back to Addison's house. Aside from a few sarcastic comments here and there, Teagan hadn't said much, and Addison still had no idea why her sister was really here.

"Teag, what's going on?"

"You're different here, Add. More annoying than I remember."

"Funny. Seriously, though…"

"Why'd you move to L.A.?"

"Don't try to change the subject."

"You won't answer _my_ question. Why should I answer yours?"

"Because you're the one who showed up out of the blue and just waltzed right into my life with no real explanation."

Teagan looked taken aback. "Good God, Addison. If I'm such a burden on your precious life, why did you agree to let me stay?"

She looked away from Addison, staring blankly off toward the beach.

"Look, Teag… I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. I really have missed you."

Teagan didn't move.

"Come on, Teagers… you can't be mad at me forever," Addison prodded. "I'm your favorite sister."

"_Half_-sister."

"I'm still your favorite."

"You're my _only_."

"Minor details."

Teagan finally showed a hint of a smile, although still refusing to look in Addison's direction.

"Ah, is that a smile I see?"

"Shut up," Teagan replied, smiling wider.

Addison smiled back at her.

"For the record," Teagan said, "I missed you, too."

"So… are you going to tell me why you're here?"

"Are you going to tell me why _you're_ here?" she asked, still avoiding the subject. "What the hell happened in Seattle?"

"I don't want to talk about Seattle. And that includes Derek. And Mark."

Teagan was quiet, carefully judging the expression in her sister's face.

"Then I guess you're not interested in the fact that I made a little stop in the Emerald City on my way here."

* * *

That seemed like a fun place to end it. You may disagree.

The next chapter will be interesting. Teagan in Seattle…

Review, por favor.


	3. Have You Ever Seen the Rain?

You're all lucky that I'm the master of procrastination. I should have been doing homework when I was writing this, but it was just much more entertaining than marketing research. Shocking, I know.

So, I loved the review that said that they loved Teagan, but they didn't know why because she was pretty annoying. I'm glad that's the way you see her because that's how I've been trying to portray her. She's sarcastic, bitter, and cynical, and you'll find out why later. I'm hoping she'll turn into a real person eventually, if I can get her to snap out of this annoying phase she seems to be going through.

But for now… the adventures of Teagan in Seattle.

* * *

_**Chapter 3  
**__**Have You Ever Seen the Rain?**_

_Someone told me long ago  
__There's a calm before the storm  
__I know  
__It's been coming for some time_

"What do you mean you 'made a little stop?'"

Teagan shrugged. "I had a really long layover in Seattle."

Addison was getting more irritated by the minute. "You're telling me that you _had_ to take a flight with a layover in Seattle? That there was no other option available?"

"I never said _that_," she answered mischievously.

"So you went there on purpose?"

Teagan simply shrugged again.

"And you saw Mark? And Derek??"

"_And_ played Monopoly with them. I forgot how fun they are."

Addison sat up straighter in her chair. "What the _hell_ would prompt you to do that? Damnit, Teagan!"

"How else was I supposed to find out what's been going on with you? I've barely talked to you AT ALL. I missed my sister. And I missed my brother-in-law. Or _ex_-brother-in-law, I guess I should say."

"You could have—"

"What? Called you? Yeah, that worked out _real_ well."

Addison couldn't argue with her. She had a point there. But still.

"That doesn't mean you just _go_ to Seattle and find out things for yourself. Did you ever stop to think that maybe, just _maybe_, there was a _reason_ I didn't tell you anything about Seattle?"

Teagan didn't answer, and Addison didn't say anything further. The two sat in silence, both quietly fuming while listening to the waves crashing on the beach.

Eventually, Teagan stood up with a frustrated sigh and began clearing off the table. She took the plates inside, and as she came back out and was about to take the second load in, Addison grabbed her arm.

"I want to know."

- - - - - - - - - -

_**Yesterday in Seattle**_

Teagan's cab pulled up at the front of Seattle Grace Hospital a little before noon. Paying the driver, she thanked him and made her way through the front doors of the hospital. The same doors that Addison herself had strode through a little more than a year previously.

The woman at the desk called out to her as she strolled on by.

"Miss? Excuse me, miss? Can I help you?"

"Nope."

She had no idea where she was going, but she didn't want that woman's help. She was perfectly capable of finding what she looking for. Or, to be more precise, _who_ she was looking for.

Teagan soon discovered that if you walked through these halls purposefully, like you spent all your waking hours here and knew exactly where you were going, no one would question you.

She walked all over the hospital for a good fifteen minutes without being stopped by anyone. She was about to give in and ask someone for help when she heard a familiar voice coming from around the corner.

"Why would she say something like that? Did she _really_ think we were a _couple_?" Derek asked.

Mark let out a short laugh. "I doubt it. I'm sure she realized that I could do _much_ better than you."

"You wish."

Derek and Mark turned the corner where Teagan was standing. Derek saw her first and stopped dead in his tracks, causing Mark, who hadn't been paying attention, to run right into him, almost knocking them both to the ground.

"Derek, what the he—"

"Well, well, well… if it isn't Seattle's most attractive couple," Teagan quipped.

Mark spoke first. "Teagan?"

"In the flesh. Miss me?"

"What are you doing here?" Derek asked.

"Came to see my sister. Happen to know where she is?"

Derek and Mark looked back and forth between each other, wondering how Teagan couldn't know that Addison wasn't here anymore.

"I'm kidding," she finally told them. "I'm here to see you." She pointed at Derek.

"Why?"

"Do I need a reason to visit my favorite brother-in-law?"

"Okay, one: you don't have any other brothers-in-law. And two: I'm really not your brother-in-law anymore."

"Technicality."

"Seriously, why are you here?"

She shrugged. "Had some time on my hands."

Derek was annoyed already. "Okay, Teagan, I have a surgery in an hour, and I don't have time to play games. So you're going to hang out with Mark until I'm done, and then I'll deal with you."

"Looking forward to it," she called after Derek as he walked away. She turned to Mark. "So, you're my babysitter for the afternoon?"

"Looks that way."

"Hmmm… then you can buy me lunch. I'm starving."

He crossed his arms and looked at her, trying to keep a straight face but failing miserably. His face broke out into a grin, and he threw an arm around her shoulder.

"Come on, squirt. Let's get you some food," he said as he led her down the hall in the direction of the cafeteria. "Hey, what's the first thing that comes to mind when I say the words 'gentlemen's evening?'"

- - - - - - - - - -

"So you and Derek are… friends again?"

"Looks that way."

Teagan was surprised. "Wow."

"I know. I didn't think he'd ever forgive me after what I did to him."

"No one did."

"Wow, Teag, how do you _really_ feel?"

"Come on, Mark. What you did was really low and sleazy. But… you're his brother. Blood or not. He's stuck with you for life."

"And apparently _we're_ stuck with _you_ for life, too?"

"If you're lucky," she said, grinning at him.

They were quiet for a few minutes as they finished the rest of their lunches.

"Alright, Teag. I bought you lunch, _and_ I've graced you with the presence of my company for the last hour," Mark said. "Now _you_ get to tell me what you're really doing here."

Teagan sighed. "I need to know what happened while my sister was here."

Mark grimaced. He was _really_ hoping that she wouldn't bring up Addison. But after everything he'd put her sister through, he figured he owned Teagan somewhat of an explanation.

"How much do you know already?"

"I know she moved in with you after Derek came out here to do his 'soul searching' or whatever. And she called me crying the day after she had the…"

Teagan saw Mark visibly contort.

"Sorry," she said. "But that's the last time I _really_ talked to her."

"This'll be fun…" Mark said sarcastically. "Okay, well, I'm going to give you the _Reader's Digest_ version. A few days after you talked to her, I came home, and she was gone. I knew she'd come out here to find Derek. From what I've pieced together, she offered him divorce papers, but he didn't sign. He told her he wanted to work things out, even though he'd started another relationship with an intern. Meredith Grey. He kept pining for her even after he told Addison he was trying. It killed Addison to see her husband looking at another woman that way. I came out here a couple months later and tried to get her to come back home with me. Stupid, I know. I knew she would never come. She loved Derek too much. So I went back home, and things apparently got worse from there… Derek cheated on her. She found out, called me, and I flew out here. A transcontinental booty call, she said. Either way, I knew she needed someone here, even though she wouldn't admit it. They finally divorced, and Derek and Meredith have been on and off since then."

Mark paused.

"Teagan… your sister had a _really_ rough time here. Especially the past year. She tried to hide it, and she succeeded for the most part. But she's one of my best friends, so I can read her pretty well. And I could tell how much it was killing her to see Derek with another woman. I hated that she still felt that way about him. Anyway, somehow we made this ridiculous deal that we would start a relationship if I was celibate for 60 days."

Teagan stifled a laugh thinking about _Mark_ practicing celibacy, to which he sent her a nasty glare.

"Sorry," she said.

"Long story short, she never wanted to be with me. So I let her off the hook. She took a trip down to L.A. to visit Naomi, and I guess Naomi offered her a job while she was down there. Four weeks later, there was a resignation letter on the Chief's desk, and she was gone. Didn't say goodbye to me or Derek. Not that I can blame her."

Teagan didn't know how to respond. An hour ago, she had been furious at her sister. Now… well, now she understood. She was still mad, but at least there was some explanation behind the lack of contact she'd had with her.

"Thanks, Mark," she said softly.

"No problem, squirt."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Shoot."

"Did you love my sister?"

Mark paused for a moment, unsure of how to respond. "I have always loved her. I still do. But I don't think I was ever _in_ love with her. I just convinced myself that I was."

Teagan nodded. That was what she had suspected.

"Is she… I mean, do you think she's still in love with Derek?"

Mark looked right at Teagan and said, "She'll deny it if you ask her... but I'd bet my life on it."

- - - - - - - - - -

"Teagan's coming to the gentlemen's evening tonight," Mark stated as he approached Derek in the locker room.

"What? Why?"

"She doesn't have anywhere else to go."

"But it's a _gentlemen's_ evening. And we're not even sure what that entails."

"She's 21, Derek. Not 12. She'll be fine. And come on, it's _Richard_. The man brought assorted cheeses and a suitcase on wheels when you guys went camping. I really doubt the evening is going to get too risqué."

"Well, yeah…"

"Plus, she's fun. Maybe she'll even get you to loosen up some. _You_ used to be fun."

Derek sighed, defeated. "Fine."

They grabbed their coats and headed for the door.

"What do you mean I _used_ to be fun?"

- - - - - - - - - -

An hour later, Derek, Mark, and Teagan were sitting on the porch outside Derek's trailer waiting for Richard to show up.

"So, you really live out here, huh?"

"Ugh. Here we go," Derek mumbled, mostly to himself.

"It's… weird. You're living in a tin can in the woods. You realize that, right?"

"Yes."

"You _are_ aware of the fact that you make enough money not to have to live in a _trailer_, right? Because you're kinda acting like you don't know that. And I get it… you're doing the Paul Bunyan thing… getting in touch with nature and whatever. That's cool. But seriously, where is civilization? There's nothing but nature out here. If you died out here, it would take days for someone to find you. This is why I'm really not a big fan of nature. Well, in the daytime, it's okay. I'm not real fond of nature at night, though. Mosquitoes and bears and all that jazz…"

Derek simply nodded his head and took another drink of his beer as Teagan continued to chatter. He'd learned over the years that it was easier to just nod his head and let the Montgomery women say what they wanted to say. Half the time, it didn't even matter whether or not he was listening, anyway. They talked a lot.

"Does she ever stop talking?" Mark whispered.

"Not usually."

"So when do the festivities begin?" she asked. "I'm getting bored."

"Go inside and get a book or something then," Derek told her.

Teagan sighed, rose from her chair, and went inside.

"He doesn't have any… fetishes, does he? He doesn't seem like the fetish type of guy," Mark reasoned.

Richard's car pulled up beside his trailer just then, and he stepped out.

"Okay, Richard," Derek said. "You have been vague about this all day, and it's been fun, but seriously… what _is_ a gentlemen's evening?"

Richard looked at him as if he were insane. "Just what it sounds like. An evening with the gentlemen. No ladies."

Teagan chose that particular moment to emerge from Derek's trailer.

"You have absolutely nothing that interests me," she told him. "Word," she said to Richard.

"What's going on here?" he asked, watching Teagan sit down between his two attendings.

"Stripper," Mark said quickly.

"What?!" Teagan and Richard exclaimed at the same time.

"Richard, this is Teagan. She's just _visiting_ for the night," Derek informed him.

"We weren't informed of the 'no ladies' rule," Mark said.

"Pretty boys living in the woods," came a voice from behind Richard. Erica Hahn walked up the steps and came to a stop in front of Derek and Mark. "Cute. Or pathetic. Not sure which."

"I thought you said 'no ladies,' Chief," Mark said.

Richard shrugged. "Plans change."

Erica turned her attention to Teagan and stuck out her hand. "Erica Hahn. And you are…?"

"Teagan Montgomery."

Richard shot Derek and Mark a questioning look to which Mark responded with a look that told him not to say anything.

"Nice to meet you. So which one of these schmucks do you belong to?"

"Neither. They're just… old friends."

Mark interjected before the conversation could go any further. "Alright. Drinks, anyone?"

- - - - - - - - - -

"No way! You cheated!"

Mark held up both of his hands in front of his chest. "Did not."

"You _so_ cheated," Teagan accused him. "I've played this game with you tons of times, and the only time you win is when you're the banker."

"And, _conveniently_, you just so happened to be the banker," Derek pointed out.

"Alright, well, I think that's about enough fun for me," Richard interrupted. "Teagan, it was nice to meet you. And the rest of you… I'll see you tomorrow, if you don't kill each other first."

"Well, I think I'm going to call it a night, too," Erica said, reaching for her purse and then standing up.

"See you tomorrow," Derek called after her. He turned to Mark. "You crashing here tonight?"

"Well, I'm certainly not in any condition to drive, now am I?" he responded, pointing at the empty bottles beside him.

"Right. And I assume you're staying here, too?" he addressed Teagan.

"You betcha. Wouldn't want to deprive you of my presence, even if I _do_ hate nature."

"Great."

"Don't sweat it. I have to be at the airport around 7:00 tomorrow, so I'll be out of your hair soon enough."

Derek began to clean up the bottles and other items that had collected on the porch throughout the night. Teagan stood to help him, and by the time they were finished, Mark was already asleep in the hammock.

"Hey, Derek?" Teagan asked as they went inside for the night. "Can we talk? For real?"

Derek considered it for a second before replying, "Sure."

They sat down on the couch a few feet apart.

"What's up?" Derek asked her.

"I miss my sister," Teagan started. "I've needed her so bad lately, and it's like she just disappeared. And I don't know what I did to make her not want to talk to me."

Derek felt terrible. "It's not you, Teagan."

"You don't know that."

"It's not," he insisted.

"How would you even know? From what I hear, you treated her like shit while she was here, and she put up with it until she finally came to her senses. You had no idea what was going on in her life. You didn't care." She paused and then said, "I should hate you, you know."

Derek just stared at her.

"For the way you treated Addison. You know what our family is like. You should have known that you were her entire world. She didn't really have anyone else, and you just… didn't care. Didn't even _try_ to make an effort."

"Now, wait a second…"

"Hey, I'm not saying that she's not partly to blame. She is. But you know her better than anyone. You should have seen what you were doing to her. She was falling apart, and you didn't even _try_ to put her back together."

Teagan expected a defensive rebuttal from him. Instead, he simply said, "You're right."

She stared at him in amazement.

"You're right. I didn't care. And she put up with everything I put her through. And she… I… I broke her. You did nothing wrong."

Teagan watched her former brother-in-law, seeing the pain that was evident in his face.

"When we got divorced, I was _sure_ that was what I wanted. But lately… I've been thinking about her every day. Wondering what she's doing, who she's with, if she's happy."

"You miss her, too."

"Yeah. I miss her, too."

"How much?"

* * *

Oooh. Let the fun begin. Well, in a few chapters or so. 

The lovely Montgomery sisters have other things to deal with first.

Review, and I'll give you a cookie.


	4. ObLaDi, ObLaDa Life Goes On

Oh, boy. What to say? I am _still_ full from Thanksgiving, and I have an insane amount of homework to get done in the next few weeks.

BUT… because you are all so great about reviewing (which I love), I am posting this for you guys to hold you over until I can update again. Derek and Mark make a brief appearance, but this chapter is mostly the Addison and Teagan Show.

Also, the title of the chapter is a song by The Beatles. My aunt randomly started singing it the other day, and it's been stuck in my head. So… I really just threw it in here for my own amusement. But the "life goes on" part is pretty applicable, I think.

READ.

* * *

_**Chapter 4  
**__**Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da (Life Goes On)**_

Addison woke up the next morning around 5:30, unsure of why she was awake at this time of day when she didn't even have to be at work for another three hours.

Something had startled her from her peaceful, complacent state of being.

"What the hell…" she said groggily, dragging herself out of bed and down the stairs to the kitchen.

There she discovered the source of the noise that had woke her up.

Teagan. Dancing in the kitchen. While attempting to make breakfast.

"_What_ are you doing awake at five-frickin-thirty?"

Teagan almost dropped the carton of milk in her hand.

"Shit! Addison, don't _do_ that!" she said, turning the music down.

"You're the one who woke me up. In _my_ house."

"Sorry. I didn't think you'd hear the music. I was just up and thought I'd make something to eat."

Addison sat down at the table and laid her head on her arm. "Why _are_ you up?"

"Still on east coast time," Teagan replied. "Hungry?"

"No. It's _five-thirty _in the_ morning_."

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't you used to being woken up at all hours of the day?"

Addison groaned. "Not anymore."

"L.A. has made you soft."

"Has not."

"Go back to bed. I'll turn the music on again in an hour or so."

"Don't want to move. What were you listening to, anyway?"

"The Beatles."

Addison smiled slightly. "Dad's favorite," she remembered.

"Yeah."

_Ob-la-di, ob-la-da  
__Life goes on  
__La la la la  
__Life goes on_

"This song is ridiculous," Addison said, half-asleep again.

"Whatever. You love it."

- - - - - - - - - -

"How are things going with the prodigal sister?" Naomi asked Addison later that morning.

"Fine, I guess. Still not sure why she's here, but we made it through the night without killing each other, so that's a step in the right direction." Addison paused. "She went to Seattle the other day."

Naomi looked at her surprised. "What?"

"Yeah…"

"To see…?"

"Yep."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

Addison sat her glass down on the counter and let out a frustrated groan.

"You okay?" Naomi asked.

"Yeah. It's just… frustrating. You know? I was just getting used to this new life, and now all this crap from the past is surfacing again."

"Your sister is crap from the past?"

"No! I mean, I love her and all… but I don't even know her anymore. I barely feel like I had a chance to know her before. Eighteen years is a big gap."

Naomi just nodded.

"And now she's here – everywhere – and talking about Derek and Mark and Seattle… and I just… I don't know." She paused. "Anyway… I can't deal with this now. I've got patients."

Addison hurried off, leaving Naomi standing in the kitchen. She sighed, remembering the stories Addison had told her about her family back in med school. She _really_ hoped Teagan wouldn't cause her as much grief as the rest of her family had.

- - - - - - - - - -

Addison's mother passed away when she was thirteen years old. Patricia Montgomery had battled ovarian cancer for three years before developing breast cancer as well. She had been a kind, compassionate woman who loved her husband and her daughter very much. Addison was her pride and joy, and Edward was the love of her life. When she passed away, they were devastated.

Edward never showed any interest in re-marrying throughout most of Addison's high school years. He knew she had a rough time having lost her mother right before starting high school. It was never easy to lose a parent, but a girl needs her mother, especially at that age. So he focused on providing for his only child and being there for her as both parents.

When her senior year began, Addison was busy with school and band and applying to colleges for the fall. A few years later, she realized that this was probably the time when Edward had become conscious of the fact that his baby girl would soon be leaving him, and he would be alone. He started seeing Lorraine around this time. By the end of her senior year, her father had married Lorraine, who was pregnant with Addison's half-sister. Teagan Elizabeth Montgomery was born in November of Addison's freshman year of college.

Addison never really had the chance to spend much time with her little sister, mostly due to the fact that she was away at college. But the other part of it had to do with Lorraine. She had never really accepted Addison as part of her family. Edward had tried his hardest to get the two to bond, but it never happened. Addison dreaded long breaks from school when she had to spend time at home with her step-mother, and she tried to spend as little time as possible there. She missed her father, but he would come visit her at school when he was in New York on business. So she stopped coming home as often.

A few years later, she began her first year of med school, where she began dating Derek Shepherd. The first (and only) time she brought him home, they had been together almost a year. He had wanted to meet her family before then, but she had refused, afraid that her step-mother would scare him off.

The weekend he spent at home with her was a disaster. Of course, her father was pleasant and even accepting of Derek. Lorraine, on the other hand, did everything in her power to drive Derek away. Addison tried to ignore her behavior, but the final straw came with Lorraine blatantly told Addison that Derek was not suitable for a young woman of her social standing. In front of Derek. Her father never actually agreed with his wife, but he didn't stand up for Addison, either. She and Derek ended up leaving that night, and she never went back.

The only times that Addison saw her sister after that was the week during the summer when Teagan would come stay with her and Derek. Lorraine was always gone at least a week each summer, so Edward let his daughters spend the time together. He would come get Teagan at the end of the week and spend a day or two with both of them before returning home.

That's how it had been ever since Addison could remember. Well, up until a few years ago. She hadn't really seen any of them since then.

Naomi remembered back to med school when Addison had told her why she wasn't going home for Thanksgiving. It made her sad then, and it still made her sad now. How could a parent put someone else over his own child? Naomi had never actually met Edward Montgomery, and even though Addison insisted that he was a good guy, she didn't quite believe her. All she knew was Addison preferred not to talk about her family, if she could help it. Which is why she was concerned that Teagan was in town.

She really hoped everything was alright.

- - - - - - - - - -

Addison left work around 5:00 and made a quick trip to the grocery store after realizing that she didn't really have anything to make for dinner.

She pulled into her driveway and gathered her things from the back seat. She headed up to the front door, hoping that Teagan had left her house in one piece after being home alone all day with nothing to do.

Everything was quiet when she walked in, and all the lights were off.

"Teagan?"

No answer.

"Teagan?" she called out again, getting a little more worried.

Addison made a quick sweep through the living room, but her sister wasn't in there.

"Teagan? Answer, please."

She walked upstairs, thinking that maybe Teagan had fallen asleep earlier that afternoon. As she walked toward the guest bedroom where her sister was staying, she heard a muffled noise coming from behind the partially closed door.

She knocked softly while pushing the door open further.

"Teag?"

Teagan didn't seem to hear her. Addison slowly walked in and found her sister sitting on the floor, leaning up against the bed with her back to the door. She was clasping onto to a pillow that was situated between her chest and her knees, which were pulled up close to her chest. And she was crying.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Addison asked concerned.

It was then that she noticed the piece of paper that Teagan was holding in her hand. And the image on the paper was something that Addison recognized very well.

Addison slid down on the floor next to her sister and pulled her into a tight hug. Teagan laid her head on Addison's shoulder and sobbed even harder.

- - - - - - - - - -

After the crying had subsided, Addison convinced Teagan to come downstairs to the living room where it was more comfortable and they could talk.

"Teag? What's going on?"

"I can't go back home."

"Why not?"

"Because of this," she said, handing Addison the piece of paper she had been holding earlier.

It was a sonogram.

"You're…"

"No."

"Did you have—"

"No."

Addison put an arm around her sister's shoulder as she began to softly cry.

"Teag, I'm so sorry."

"Yeah… me, too."

Teagan took a deep, shaky breath, and Addison gave her hand a little squeeze.

"When I found out that I was pregnant, I freaked out. But then… I don't know. Somewhere along the way, I fell in love with that little life. When I told my boyfriend, he left me. Said he couldn't be a father and couldn't deal with it. So I decided I was going to do it on my own. I finally got up the courage to tell my mom. And all she could say was that I was a disgrace. She went on and on about what people were going to think about her 21-year-old daughter getting herself knocked up during her senior year of college. That's all she cared about."

Teagan paused, seemingly thinking of what to say next.

"Anyway… she refused to pay my tuition anymore, and with the job I had, I was making just enough for rent. And I didn't have enough in savings to pay for school. So I thought what better time to just… leave. Leave Connecticut and get a fresh start on life. I was packing and trying to find a place to stay until I figured out where I was going to go when I guess I passed out."

She took a breath, trying to choke back a sob.

"Next thing I knew, I was in the hospital. Alone. And no baby."

"Teagan…"

"I had my friend Katie come get me, and I moved in with her for a couple days. I withdrew from school, bought a plane ticket, and two days later, I was in Seattle."

"What about Dad?" Addison asked softly.

"He's been away on business for… I don't even know how long. He had no idea what was going on."

"Oh, Teagan… I wish I would have known before."

"It's okay."

"No, it's not. I should have been there for you. I should have made an effort to call more and visit."

"It's not your fault. I didn't want to tell you. All I wanted to do was forget about it."

Addison looked at her, her heart breaking because she knew exactly how she felt. It was the same way she had felt back in New York with Mark.

Teagan spoke, her voice barely above a whisper, "I know it would have been _so_ hard to do it alone… but I _really_ wanted that baby."

Addison took her hand and looked her directly in the eye. "It gets better, Teag. I know it doesn't seem like it right now. But it does."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

"God, I hope you're right."

Addison hugged her sister and rubbed her back, silently letting her know that she had someone who was there for her.

- - - - - - - - - -

**Seattle**

"I had your surgeries cancelled for the next week," Derek declared.

Mark spun around to face him. "Excuse me?"

"We're taking a trip."

"Oh, we are, are we?" Mark asked as he crossed his arms and look curiously at Derek.

"Yes. You accused me of not being fun anymore? Well, this is fun. And it starts tomorrow at 8:00 am."

"And clearly not a minute sooner. Mind telling me where we're going?"

Derek paused from pulling things from his locker and looked over at his friend. "_Fun_, Mark. Remember? Where's your sense of adventure?"

Mark paused. "You're not taking me somewhere to have me killed, are you?"

Derek laughed. "That idea is no longer appealing to me. We're just taking a road trip. Like we used to do back in college. Come on, it'll be fun."

"What else aren't you telling me?"

"You've gotten rather cynical in your old age, buddy. Look, I talked to Richard, and he gave both of us the time off. So you can either come with me, or you can sit around here for a week with nothing to do."

Mark looked at Derek, knowing there was still another reason to his sudden need to take this road trip. But Mark had never been one to turn down an opportunity for a little adventure.

"Alright, let's do it."

* * *

I hope this was enough to last you guys for a while because I wasn't kidding when I said that I have a TON of stuff to do the next few weeks.

Review. Because I am a review whore. There. I said it. 


	5. Acting As If

Contrary to popular belief, I have _not_ died. The end of the quarter was hellish. I don't want to talk about it.

One of my professors told us the other day, "I have a job that I really love. And I'm sorry that in a few months, you won't." How encouraging.

This chapter is kind of short. At least it seemed like it to me. But I blame that on the fact that my creativity was stifled from the over-abundance of studying I've done.

* * *

_**Chapter 5  
**__**Acting As If**_

"Hey, how're you feeling this morning?" Addison asked as Teagan stumbled lazily into the kitchen the next morning.

"Better. Tired. I was up until 2:30 this morning crying, which sucked, but I think it helped."

Addison nodded. "Yeah, it usually does. Coffee?"

"No, thanks. I plan on sleeping most of the day. I'm only up because I heard you down here, and I just wanted to say thanks again for… you know… being there for me."

"You're welcome, Teag. If you ever need to talk some more… I'm here."

"Thanks."

Teagan sat at the table a few minutes longer, absently watching as Addison got her coffee and breakfast ready.

"Well," Teagan said, standing up. "That was a nice moment of civilized sisterly bonding. Dr. Phil would be proud. And now I'm going back to bed."

"Have a good day," Addison said as she closed the door behind her.

- - - - - - - - - -

"We need to talk," Naomi approached Addison as soon as she stepped off the elevator.

"And good morning to you, too."

"Yeah, whatever."

She hurried Addison to her office and closed the door.

"Ugh. I haven't had enough coffee yet to properly deal with you," Addison said, plopping down in her chair and staring at Naomi.

Naomi ignored her remark. "Remember the other day when we talked about Pete, and you thought I was meddling?"

"Yeah…"

"Well, you _may_ think this constitutes meddling again. But Pete is dead-set on asking you out, and I told him he shouldn't, but I'm pretty sure he didn't hear a word I said. So I thought you might want to know so you can find a way to turn him down nicely."

Addison was quiet for a minute before saying slowly, "I think I'll go."

"You think you'll _what_?"

"Go out. With Pete."

"Why?!"

"Why not? Why shouldn't I go out and have a good time? I haven't been on a date in… fifteen years. Plus, there's the added bonus of pissing you off."

Naomi glared at her. "You are impossible, you know that? You _just_ said the other day that you _know_ that Pete isn't interested in anything long-term."

"Yeah, I know what I said. But I'm not just going to sit around and _hope_ that the perfect guy appears at my doorstep. I need to get out there. I need to feel _something_ again, even if that something is only temporary."

"What if that something is only going to hurt you?" Naomi asked gently.

Addison considered her question for a moment before answering.

"Anything would be better than feeling so… numb."

- - - - - - - - - -

Teagan was awakened around noon by the sound of her cell phone ringing on the nightstand next to her.

She grabbed it and flipped it open without looking at the caller ID.

"Hello?"

"It's me."

"Ugh. I don't know who 'me' is. You're going to have to be a little more specific."

"It's Derek."

"Why are you whispering?"

"I'm not," he lied. "Just wanted to check in and see how things are going."

"They're fine. She's at work and doesn't know anything. She asked me about Seattle, but I '_accidentally_' left out our conversation. Oops."

"Okay, good. So I'm planning on being there late tomorrow afternoon at the latest, but I'll have to call you tomorrow morning and let you know for sure."

"Sounds good. So Mark actually agreed to come with you, huh?"

"Uh… yeah… yep, he's with me."

Teagan heard Mark's voice in the background, and then Derek said quickly, "Hey, Teagan, I gotta go. Talk to you tomorrow."

Before she could answer, he hung up. "That was weird…"

- - - - - - - - - -

"Hey," Pete greeted Addison later that afternoon.

"Hey."

"You saw Janie Hayes this morning?"

"Yeah, she's doing really well with this pregnancy. Looking over her chart, I wasn't sure she would be with all she went through last time, but everything's going smoothly so far."

"Good to hear."

Addison nodded, knowing what was coming.

"So… are you free tomorrow night?"

She smiled slyly. "Maybe. Depends."

"Well, if you are, I was thinking we could… have dinner or something."

She cocked her eyebrow.

Pete took notice and began rambling. "I know what was said the other day, but it's just dinner. Just come out with me, and we'll see where it goes from there."

She pretended to consider it before answering, "Okay. But I'm not promising anything."

"Neither am I."

"Okay. Pick me up at 7:00."

She brushed by him much closer than necessary on her way out the door and turned around, smirking at him because she knew he was watching her walk away.

He smiled and shook his head, afraid to believe that he could really be falling for her.

- - - - - - - - - -

Teagan was sitting on the couch in the living room with her feet propped up on the coffee table and watching TV when Addison got home later.

"I'm home," she announced, closing the door behind her.

"In here," Teagan replied.

Addison headed to the living room. "Hel-looo," she said, drawing out the syllables.

Teagan just stared at her.

"What?"

"You're being weird," Teagan said bluntly.

"I am _not_ being weird, unless it is weird for me to be happy to see my one and only sister."

"Yep. You're definitely being weird."

"Oh, so funny. But really, I thought about it a lot today, and I think I need to go on record and apologize for my attitude toward you when you first got here."

"Okay…"

"I shouldn't have given you such a hard time because it really wasn't _you_ that I was angry with. Because I think that… well, I – I have a lot of pent-up anger and hostility, you know? And I've been wondering who I should blame that on."

"Uh… I'm not really qualified to…"

Addison continued, seemingly not hearing a word Teagan said. "You know… because I've been blaming it on your mother and my ex-husband, and, well… that doesn't seem to be working."

"It usually works for me."

"So I thought about it a lot today, and I've decided that I'm tired of placing the blame on other people. _I'm_ the one I've been angry at this whole time. I haven't been letting myself _live_. I've been holding back and wallowing in self-pity for a long time now. So I'm going to stop."

Teagan couldn't figure out what had prompted this journey to self-discovery that Addison currently seemed to be on. "Did someone slip you something at work today?"

"No," she said with a laugh. "Pete asked me out, though. And I said yes."

Teagan sat up straight and stared at her sister.

"What?!"

"Yep. I'm going out to dinner with him tomorrow night."

"Noooo!" Teagan shouted without thinking. "That's not part of the plan!"

"What plan?"

_Oh, shit_. "Uh… my plans. For tomorrow. I was hoping you and I could have some… girl time. You know… watch chick flicks, order pizza, get fat. Come on, it'll be fun."

"How 'bout we do that _tonight_ instead? I picked up some stuff on my way home for a girls' night in. Thought we could spend tonight catching up."

"I… uh… I'm kinda tired tonight," Teagan said, blurting out the first excuse that came to mind.

"Didn't you sleep all day?"

"Yes… yes, I did…"

"Look, I know you've had a really rough couple of months. So I wanted to try to cheer you up. I picked up some deliciously fatty food and a couple of movies on the way home, and we're going to do our sisterly bonding thing tonight. We'll laugh, we'll cry… good times will had by all."

Teagan rolled her eyes. "Okay, I don't need a pity party, so if that's what this is going to turn into…"

"It's not, oh cynical one. I just feel bad that I haven't been around. So I wanted to spend some time with you."

Teagan sighed. She couldn't really say no to that, now could she? "Are you _sure_ about going out with Pete tomorrow? From what you've said about him, he doesn't really seem like your type."

"Okay, one: I've hardly said anything to you about him. And two: I don't have a type."

"You _do_ have a type."

"And it's just one date. I don't even know if it will go anywhere. But I think I owe it to myself to at least give it a shot."

"Fine," Teagan relented. "Now, where's the yummy food I was promised?"

"I'll go get it," Addison said, heading back into the kitchen.

Teagan sighed and sank back into the couch. This wasn't supposed to happen. Addison's date was definitely going to mess things up.

She would have to figure something out in the morning, though. There wasn't much she could do about it tonight.

* * *

Someone is in denial. Her name starts with "A" and ends with "ddison."

It's almost Christmas; therefore, I think you should review. Especially since I will soon have a lot more free time now that finals are almost over…


	6. Here Comes the Sun

I don't even have anything witty to say.

But thanks to Kendel for the oh-so-helpful schedule you made me. I didn't follow it at all. But it's the thought that counts, right?

Read.

* * *

_**Chapter 6  
**__**Here Comes the Sun**_

"Derek Shepherd. If you don't answer your phone, I am going to do something _very _unpleasant to you the next time I see you. You can count on that."

Teagan snapped her phone shut and groaned.

He and Mark were supposed to be here later today, and she couldn't get a hold of them.

Having Addison come home announcing that she was going out with Pete had seriously thrown a kink in Teagan's plans for the evening, and now the gruesome twosome were God-knows-where, and she had no idea what was going on.

She picked up her phone and dialed Derek's number again.

Four rings and then voicemail.

- - - - - - - - - -

"Give me the keys, Mark!"

"Over my dead body. We're going back home."

"No, we're not. I can leave you here, and _you_ can go back home. But I'm going to L.A."

"_You_ said we were going to Vegas."

Derek rolled his eyes. "Well, of course I did. How else was I going to get you to come with me?"

"This is the _dumbest_ idea you've ever had," Mark groaned. "And you've had some pretty stupid ones. I should have known something was up… you've been acting weird since Teagan came to visit."

"Give me the keys," Derek demanded again.

"I never would have come with you if I'd have known that this was your plan all along."

"Then go back home. No one's stopping you."

Mark was frustrated. "If I'm going home, you're coming with me."

"Wrong again."

"Do you remember the last time we went along with an idea that originated in the mind of Teagan? It ended with us standing outside your house. In the dead of winter. With no pants."

"That was _years_ ago."

"But Teagan is still the same," Mark pointed out. "And I don't want to lose my pants again. I need my pants."

"If I recall, you weren't complaining about having no pants when Lucy invited _you_ in," Derek said, remembering how his neighbor had heard them outside and invited Mark (and Mark only) inside.

"That's not the point."

"Well, what is the point then?"

"Derek, Addison has moved on. She moved away from us for a reason. Let's just go home and try to salvage whatever dignity we have left."

"I can't," Derek said, lowering the tone of his voice. "I miss her."

"We all miss her, but you don't see any of the rest of us jumping in a car and driving down to see her. A _normal_ person would just pick up the phone."

"You don't get it, Mark. I _miss_ her."

Mark sighed and began to pace.

"Why, all of a sudden, did you decide that you miss her? What about all that time that she was right there in front of your face?"

"I don't know. I just… I just know that there has been a piece of me missing for a while, and until a few days ago, I didn't realize what that piece was."

Mark looked at him skeptically.

"I know it's probably too late and that she's probably moved on. But I need to see her."

"And what do you plan on doing once you get there?" Mark asked skeptically.

"I'm going to talk to her. Tell her how I feel."

"Uh huh… and how, exactly, are you going to get her to give you the time of day?"

"Well, I haven't quite worked that out yet. But I'm sure groveling will be involved."

- - - - - - - - - -

"Good morning," Addison greeted Naomi.

"You're in a good mood."

"Yes. I am. So don't try and ruin it for me. This is the new Addison. The happy Addison. And I like her, so don't go scaring her away."

"Fine," Naomi said dejectedly. "So I assume this sickeningly good mood means you're still set on going out with Pete tonight?"

"He's picking me up at 7:00 for dinner."

Naomi opened her mouth to say something, but Addison cut her off.

"And yes, for the seventeenth time, I'm sure. Drop it, please."

Naomi sighed. "Will you at least call me afterwards and let me know how it goes?"

"Promise not to be all negative and judgmental?"

"No. But I'll do my best."

- - - - - - - - - -

Teagan's snatched her phone off the table as soon as it started ringing.

"It's about time," she said annoyed.

"Addison's gonna kill you when she finds out what you are up to," Mark's voice came over the line.

"Oh, it's you."

"She's gonna kill you both."

"Uh, correction: the _three_ of us."

"No, no, no," he protested. "I'm not in on this. No way, no how."

"What?"

"I just found out about this stupid idea. And I don't want to be part of it."

"What do you mean you just found out?"

"Derek didn't tell me the real reason behind his sudden need for adventure, or I else wouldn't be tagging along on this train wreck. Although now that I am, I kinda want to see Addison kill the two of you. It could be fun."

Teagan scoffed, "Addison doesn't know what's good for her. She'll thank me. Eventually. Until then, I've got _you_ to back me up."

"We'll see about that."

"Put Derek on the phone."

She heard Mark pass him the phone. "Hey."

"How long until you get here?"

"I think we're about three hours away," Derek replied.

"Seriously? That doesn't put you here until around 6:30," Teagan pointed out, frustrated. "You were supposed to be here _now_."

"Yeah, well… Mark and I had a little… disagreement. And then we had to stop for food."

"I don't care," she said. "Just get here soon."

"Why? What's the rush?"

"Just because. I have to go do something. Call me when you get closer."

She snapped her phone shut in annoyance and bolted up the stairs to Addison's room.

- - - - - - - - - -

"I can't find my black shoes," Addison complained. "Pete is going to be here in twenty minutes, and I can't find my shoes, I still need to do my make-up, and _you_ are just sitting there watching me."

Teagan shrugged.

"You're not going to help me?"

"How should I know where your shoes are? I've only been here a few days. That doesn't give me enough time to borrow and lose them yet."

"Would you at least get up and _pretend_ you're looking for them? It would make me feel better."

Teagan stood up and wandered into Addison's closet, pretending to look for her shoes while Addison went in the bathroom to do her make-up. She knew the shoes weren't there, but she was going to wait a while longer before "finding" them.

"Can't find them, Add."

She let out an irritated groan. "Great. Just great."

Teagan plopped back down on Addison's bed with a mischievous grin, knowing that Addison couldn't see her from where she was in the bathroom. She heard Addison begin rifling through her make-up drawer.

"And now I can't find my eye make-up. Fan-frickin-tastic."

Teagan smiled to herself.

"Can I borrow yours?"

"Yeah, I'll go get it," Teagan said as she walked to her room as slowly as she could.

So far, so good. It was taking Addison much longer than necessary to get ready, and Derek and Mark would be there any minute.

Teagan sat on her bed and counted to fifty before returning to Addison's room with her make-up.

"Here ya go," she said, setting it down on the counter.

A few minutes later, Addison was finished.

"Ugh!" she exclaimed. "Where are those shoes? I just had them yesterday. And if I can't find them, I'm going to have to change."

"I'll go check downstairs," Teagan volunteered.

She meandered downstairs to the hall closet where she had hidden the shoes earlier that day and returned to Addison's room a few minutes later.

"Found them," she said, holding them out for her sister.

"Thanks. Where were they?"

She lied, "By the door."

"That's weird. I never leave my shoes there…"

"Hmmm…" Teagan replied vaguely.

As she walked out of Addison's room, the doorbell rang.

"Can you get that, Teag? It's Pete, and I'm not ready yet."

"In the bathroom," she replied.

Addison groaned and hurried down to the front door. She swung it open and began talking before she saw who was really there.

"Hey. Sorry, I'm not ready yet, but I should only be a few more—"

"Hi, Addie."

She didn't reply. Instead, she just stood there staring at him, not believing what she was seeing and unable to speak for a moment.

When her sense of speech returned, she managed to blurt out, "Derek."

"Hey," he said nonchalantly.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"I came to see you."

"What?"

"I. Came. To. See. You," he repeated more slowly.

"Wh—why?"

Derek shrugged. "I missed you," he said sincerely.

"You missed me?" she repeated suspiciously.

"Yeah."

Addison crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow, staring at him like he was insane.

He simply smiled back at her. "Well… are you going to invite me in?"

"No."

"That's a little rude."

"Too damn bad. You showed up here, without even calling, I might point out, and you just expect me to drop everything and invite you in so you can tell me that you 'miss me?'"

"Can I at least use your bathroom?" Derek asked smiling.

"No. You can't come in at all. I was getting ready to leave."

"Leave?"

"Yes. I have a date, who will be here any minute, and _you_ are not the first thing I want him to see when he gets here. So go, please."

Derek masked his disappointment enough that Addison didn't notice. "How about lunch tomorrow then?"

"What? Derek, no."

"Think about it. I'll come by in the morning."

"No. You are _not_ coming by in the morning. Or any other time, for that matter."

They both turned at the sound of the horn blaring from her driveway.

She turned back to him. "Who's in your car?"

"Mark."

"You brought Mark?"

"Brought. Tricked."

"You have seriously lost your mind, Shepherd. Now go. Please. Before my date gets here."

"Looks like I'm too late," Derek said as another car pulled into her driveway.

Pete got out of the car and walked toward her door, pausing for a moment when he saw the two standing in the doorway.

"Hey…" he greeted Addison tentatively.

"Pete, hi."

"Who's this?"

Derek stuck out his hand. "Derek Shepherd. Nice to meet you."

"Pete Wilder. How do you know Addison?"

"Oh, we were ma—"

"Old friends," Addison cut him off, glaring angrily at him.

"Oh. Well, are you ready to go?" Pete asked her.

"Absolutely. Just let me grab my purse," she said, dashing quickly back into the house.

Derek and Pete stood in uncomfortable silence until Addison returned.

Pete escorted her out to his car, giving Derek a sideways glance as he closed her door.

- - - - - - - - - -

Teagan came downstairs as soon as she heard Pete's car pull away. To be honest, she was surprised that Addison hadn't figured out that she had had something to do with Derek randomly showing up, but to be fair, Addison was probably a little too flustered to put the pieces together right away.

But Addison was smart. She'd probably put it together before long. And Teagan wasn't looking forward to when she did.

"Well? How'd it go?" she asked Derek.

"Oh, just great. First she asked me what the hell I am doing here, and then she not-so-politely told me that I am _not_ invited to enter her home. Oh, and then she left to go on a date with another man. Hey, thanks for _not_ mentioning that earlier."

"In my defense, you were supposed to be here hours ago. I didn't have much time to do anything about her date." She glanced around. "Where's Mark?"

"Pouting in the car."

"Tell him to get in here. I'm making dinner."

"You're cooking?" Derek asked skeptically.

"I called Domino's fifteen minutes ago."

- - - - - - - - - -

"And that's kind of why I wanted to go into alternative medicine instead of a traditional specialty. So what about you? What made you want to go into OB?"

Addison didn't respond.

"Addison?"

"Hm? Oh, sorry. What did you say?"

He sighed. "Nothing."

"Pete, I'm sorry. It's been a… weird day with Derek showing up."

"He's more than just an old friend, isn't he?"

"Yes."

"How much more?"

"He's my ex-husband."

Pete looked taken aback. "You were _married_?"

"Yeah. For almost twelve years."

"Oh."

Neither said anything for a few moments until Pete got too uncomfortable of sitting in silence.

"Look, Addison… we can go. Try this again some other time."

"No," she replied quickly. "No, it's fine. I'm fine. It's just… argh! He's not supposed to be here. I left him in Seattle. Him and my umbrella. They're both supposed to _stay_ in Seattle. They're not supposed to be here. On my doorstep. Telling me things. I don't want to hear what they have to say."

Pete just stared at her, aware that she was no longer actually talking to him.

"Why? Why now? What would make him come now, after all this ti—"

She stopped abruptly as the pieces all came together in her mind.

"I'm going to kill my sister."

* * *

Push the button. 


	7. Nothin' To Lose

Yeah, I know. It's been a while. Sorry about that. Christmas, family, work… those are my excuses.

READ.

* * *

_**Chapter 7  
**__**Nothin' To Lose**_

"Teagan Elizabeth!" Addison yelled as she threw the front door open. "Where are you?"

Teagan's head appeared from the couch. "Whaaaat?" she asked in a half-tired, half-winey voice.

"Don't play dumb with me, sister. You know exactly what," Addison said sternly, placing her hands on her hips and glaring at her younger sister. "_Why_ would you do that?"

Teagan played dumb. "Do what?"

"You're really going to make me say it? Fine. Why would you invite Derek and Mark here, especially without telling me?"

"Why is this automatically my fault?"

"Because I know you. I know your ways. We may not have seen each other much the past few years, but I know what you're capable of, and this has _you_ written all over it."

"Okay. We can talk about this tomorrow," Teagan said, pulling herself up off the couch and heading upstairs.

"No! We're going to talk now."

"Goodnight."

"Teagan!" Addison shouted up the stairs.

Teagan's door slammed shut.

"Argh!" Addison exclaimed as she went into the kitchen to pour herself a glass of wine.

Grabbing a sweater that was draped over a chair in the kitchen, she threw it on and opened the door to her deck. She stepped outside, trying to clam herself by taking in the peaceful rise and fall of the waves and scanning the beach.

"Oh, you have _got_ to be kidding."

She set her glass down on the table and walked out onto the beach, approaching a tent that looked all too familiar to her.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Derek's head poked around the side.

"Camping."

"Yes, I can see that. Why here?"

He shrugged. "Seemed as good of a spot as any."

"Why aren't you staying in a hotel?"

"This seemed more fun."

Mark scoffed from his spot a few feet away where he was sitting in the sand, refusing to help. "Speak for yourself."

"Hi, Mark," Addison greeted him obligatory. She turned back to Derek. "Okay, do you recall _any_ of our conversation from earlier?"

"Yes," Derek replied. "You said I couldn't come in your house. And I'm not. I'm on the beach."

"In front of my house."

"Told you she'd be mad," Mark butted in.

"She's not mad."

"She's not _happy_," Addison said. "Go camp somewhere else. Somewhere that's not on my property."

"This technically isn't your property," he pointed out. "You don't own the beach."

"I overpaid on that house for the view of the beach. _You_ are ruining my severely overpriced view."

"You should lighten up. It would be good for your blood pressure," he said. "Oh, hey, how was your date?"

He tried to hide the smirk on his face, knowing that she had been bothered by him showing up earlier and that had probably had an effect on the course of her date.

"How do you _think_ it went, Derek? It's 9:30, and I'm standing here talking to _you_."

"Hey, guys," Sam's voice came from behind them. "I found some wood for a fire."

"Sam!" Addison yelled. "What are you doing?"

"Oh, hi, Addison. You wanna join us? We're roasting hotdogs."

She threw up her hands, frustrated. "No. I'm going inside. I'll deal with you tomorrow," she said to Derek.

Back in the house, she dug her phone out of her purse and dialed Naomi.

"Well?" her voice came on the line. "How'd it go?"

"I think you should come over and see for yourself," Addison said, throwing back a gulp of wine.

"Come over?" Naomi repeated.

"Yeah. Come over."

Twenty minutes and another glass of wine later, there was a knock at Addison's door.

"Wanna fill me in?" Naomi asked.

"Go look out the window."

She looked at Addison questioningly and slowly walked to the window.

"Oh, my God," she exclaimed. "Is that Derek?"

"Yep. And Mark. Oh, and _your_ ex."

"What is he doing here?"

"I don't really know yet. But I know Teagan had something to do with it."

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she insisted. "Fiiiine."

"You want me to go out there?"

"No."

"You wanna just sit here and watch them?"

"Not really. But they're three city boys out there trying to make a fire. It could be mildly amusing."

Naomi grabbed the bottle of wine Addison had opened earlier and another glass.

"It will be more amusing with a little more alcohol in our systems."

"Fill me up."

- - - - - - - - - -

Addison and Naomi were still asleep in the living room when Teagan wandered downstairs the next morning. She looked at them and the empty bottles on the table and shook her head as she went into the kitchen to make coffee for them. It looked like they'd be needing it.

She opened the door to the deck and walked out to Camp Shepherd.

"Hey, guys," she greeted Derek and Mark.

"Ugh. It's too early for you to sound that chipper," Mark complained.

"It's 9:00."

"And _you_ got to sleep in a real bed last night."

"So," Derek said. "Did Addison and Naomi drink themselves into oblivion last night?"

"I don't know what they did. I was in bed. But they are both passed out in the living room, so I would say that that's a distinct possibility."

Mark piped up. "Well, they sat and watched us for at least two hours and never put down the wine. I'd be surprised if they _weren't_ passed out right now."

"What is this Pete guy like?" Derek asked, changing the subject.

"Jealous much?"

"No," he replied defensively. "Just curious."

"Well, I don't really know. He works with Addison. Has some weird specialty… alternative medicine or something."

"She's dating a quack?" Mark interrupted.

"No. She had _a_ date with the quack. Which, in my opinion, was a huge mistake on her part, and I'm glad it was cut short."

Derek smiled at her remark. "So they're not together?"

"No. Not yet, anyway. You better get your act together, Shepherd."

"_You're_ supposed to be helping me."

"I can only do so much. She's a little upset that I invited you two down here."

"Hey," Mark said defensively. "She can't be mad at me. I didn't want to come in the first place. And as an innocent bystander in this whole mess, I think I at least deserve a couch to sleep on. Pass that along, will ya?"

"Yeah. It's on the top of my 'To Do' list," she replied sarcastically.

"What is she doing tonight?" Derek asked.

"I don't think that's a good idea," Teagan warned.

"Why not?"

"Well, for one, she can't be in your presence without _yelling_. At least not yet. Just… start slow. You're going to have to get her trust back. Which is going to be no small feat."

"And how do you propose I go about doing that?" he asked skeptically.

"Simple. Back to basics…"

- - - - - - - - - -

"Good morning, sunshine," Teagan greeted Addison. "I made you some coffee."

"Voice loud. Head pounding."

"Long night?"

"I am never drinking again," Addison said, massaging her temples.

"You say that every time."

"I mean it this time."

She poured herself a cup of coffee and sat down at the table, glancing out the window.

"He's _still_ out there?"

"Yep."

"Why won't he just leave? And why did you tell him to come down here in the first place? What were you thinking?"

"He needed a break from Seattle, Addie," Teagan said seriously, trying to help Derek out as much as she could.

"There are tons of other places he could have gone."

"He misses you."

Addison scoffed, "He does _not_ miss me. He _thinks_ he misses me. And _you_ had no right butting into the situation."

"But Add—"

"No," she interrupted. "I'm doing the talking right now. Listen, Teag. You are my sister, and I love you. But there are certain parts of my life that are off-limits to you. And this is one of them. There are reasons – good reasons – why Derek and I are no longer together. And as for Pete… who I do or do not date is not up to you. Okay? Now, if you can respect that, then I don't see any reason you can't live here with me. But if you can't... then you're going to have to find somewhere else to go. Is that understood?"

"Yes."

"Good."

"And about Derek and Mark… I can… try to convince them to go somewhere else…"

"No," Addison said wearily. "Leave them there. They'll get bored eventually and move on to something else."

Neither talked for a few moments.

"Can I say something?" Teagan asked, finally daring to break the silence.

Addison nodded.

"I think you should at least talk to Derek. I mean, he _did_ drive all the way down here… you could at least _talk_ to him. Come on… admit it. You miss him a little bit."

"That is… neither here nor there. "

"Talk to him," Teagan insisted.

"Don't you have something to do?"

"No. I am currently unemployed, in case you've forgotten. This is all I have."

"Here," Addison said, pushing the newspaper toward her. "Find something else to occupy your time."

- - - - - - - - - -

"Oh, thank God. Real food," Mark said happily.

Addison stepped outside with a plate of sandwiches, heading toward Derek and Mark's makeshift campsite.

"Thought you guys might be hungry."

"You have no idea. What we ate last night was _not_ food."

Mark stood and took the plate from Addison as Derek approached her.

"Hey."

"Hi," she replied.

"So listen… about last night…"

"Forget it," she said passively.

"No, I need to apologize. I didn't mean to ruin your date. I'm sorry. And if you really want us to, we can find somewhere else to stay."

She thought about it for a minute, but said, "No, you can camp here if you want."

He smiled.

"But," she continued, "there _will_ be boundaries. You will not come into my house without permission, and under no uncertain terms will you pull another stunt like last night. Understood?"

"Understood."

She nodded her head in agreement.

"So… can we at least _try_ to be friends?" Derek asked tentatively. "If I recall correctly, I used to be a pretty good friend to have around."

"You were alright. _I_ was the great friend."

"Yeah… something like that."

Addison smiled. "You know, if you want any of those sandwiches, you better get over there and get one. Mark's inhaling them like there's no tomorrow."

"Thanks, Addie."

"What are friends for?"

* * *

Yeah. Friends. That always works out well. 

I am pretty excited for what's coming two chapters from now. Unfortunately, I have to find a way to get there. Because Derek asks a favor of Addison which I'm pretty sure she won't agree to just yet…

REVIEW.


	8. Hey, Hey, Good Lookin'

I meant to post this yesterday, but my cousin talked me into going to dinner. And then we went to my grandparents', which was just a whole mess of bickering craziness. Case in point:

**Grandpa**: (_after hitting his head on the cabinets_) I'm going to saw the corners off of these darn cabinets.  
**Grandma**: No, you're not sawing the corners off my cabinets!  
**Grandpa**: Don't worry, I'll put some rubber up there to cover it.  
**Grandma**: You will not. That would look terrible.  
**Grandpa**: But it will be a lot softer when people hit their head on it.  
**Grandma**: I don't care. You're still not sawing the corners off my cabinets.  
**Grandpa**: You let me saw the corners off those shelves in the pantry.  
**Grandma**: (p_ause_) You are NOT sawing the corners off my cabinets!

Read.

* * *

_**Chapter 8  
**__**Hey, Hey, Good **__**Lookin**__**'**_

"Hey," Pete greeted Addison on Monday morning.

"Hi," she replied nervously.

Both simply stood there, neither knowing if they should speak first.

Pete looked over at her, and she started rambling.

"Listen, Pete, I'm really sorry about the other night. I didn't meant to ruin our date, and I know I should have called and apologized before, but I didn't know what to say. So I didn't call, and now things are weird. And I'm sorry. And—"

"Addison. Stop," he cut her off. "Take a breath."

"Sorry."

"Stop saying that. It's fine. Really. I mean, yeah, it was kind of a shock to find out you had an ex-husband, let alone meet him on our first date. But I still want to try this. That is… if you do, too."

"I do," she replied, a little too quickly.

"Okay. Then… how about tomorrow?"

"Sounds great. And don't worry, I talked to Derek, and he promised not to pull another stunt like he did the other night."

"Wait… he's still around?"

"Well, yeah," she said as if he should have already known the answer to his question.

"Why?" he blurted out. "I mean… I just thought it would be weird for you is all," he continued after receiving a questioning look from Addison.

"Well, he _did_ drive all the way down here from Seattle. What was I supposed to do?"

"He's not staying with you, is he?"

"No. I mean, not technically…"

"What exactly does 'not technically' really mean?" Pete asked curiously.

"He's camping on the beach. _Outside_ my house. So see? It's fine."

Pete just crossed his arms and looked at her.

"What?" she asked. "Don't tell me that you're intimidated by him."

He raised an eyebrow.

"Pete, seriously. There's nothing to worry about. He's my _ex_ for a reason."

"If you say so," Pete said skeptically.

"I do say so," she said, reaching around him and grabbing her coffee mug from the counter. "Pick me up at 7:00 tomorrow."

- - - - - - - - - -

"Get up," Teagan said as she threw open the flaps of the tent.

Derek and Mark were startled awake, not expecting her to burst in on them.

"What the hell?" Mark croaked as he covered shielded his eyes from the incoming sunlight.

"Out of bed, slackers. We have things to do."

"No. _We_ don't," Mark grumbled. "_You_ might. _I_ plan on sleeping off this hangover."

"What do you want, Teagan?" Derek asked sleepily.

"You're making dinner for Addison tonight?"

"I am?"

"Yes."

"Why am I doing that?"

"Because you thought it would be a nice gesture after Addison didn't send your sorry ass packing. Plus, you are her friend. Friends do things like this."

Derek just stared at her.

"When did I decide all of this?"

"This morning."

"Hmmm… okay," he said, laying his head back down on the pillow.

"Up. Now," she said, nudging him a little too hard with her foot.

"Ouch!" Derek exclaimed. He rolled off the cot unwillingly. "Fine. I'm up."

"Good. Okay, now… you need to take a shower because to be honest, you don't smell very good," she said, walking back toward the house with Derek trailing behind her. "Then we're going to go to the store so you can buy stuff to make dinner, and you're going to help me clean the house before Addison gets home because she really likes the house to be clean, but she never has time to do it, and then I'll help you cook so you don't burn the place down. Because that would really suck, especially after we spend all that time cleaning it. Sound good?"

"Teagan," he said, his head spinning from her fast talking. "However much coffee you drink every morning, I want you to reduce it by half."

"I don't drink coffee."

"Then hit yourself over the head with a baseball bat, will you please?"

"Hey, I'm trying to help you win some points here. You can do it on your own, if you want. We've both seen how well that's worked out for you."

"Fine. Let's do this," he agreed. "Hey, wait… if I'm out of bed, why isn't Mark?"

"Because he's not the one trying to win Addison back," she explained to him as if she were talking to a child. "And what are you? Five?"

Derek looked at her in mock hurt.

"Don't worry… he gets to help us clean," Teagan said with a grin.

- - - - - - - - - -

"Oh. My. God," Addison exclaimed as she walked through the door that evening. "If I had known how _bored_ I would be today, I would have just stayed in bed. Or counted the tiles on the kitchen floor. Even _that_ would have been more exciting."

She stopped talking as she noticed the smells coming from the kitchen.

"Teagan? Are you cooking?" she asked in a surprised voice.

"Hi, friend," Derek said as Addison walked into the kitchen.

"What are you doing in my house?"

"Making you dinner."

"You didn't break in, did you?"

He laughed. "No."

"Okay… do you remember what I said about not coming into this house without permission?"

"Your sister let me in," he said innocently. "Do you not want dinner? Because I can just take this back to the beach and mind my own business…"

"Well… you went through the trouble of making it and everything…"

He smiled. He knew he wouldn't be getting an apology, but that was close enough.

"Why don't you just go into the living room and relax? I'll call you when it's ready."

"Okay," she agreed. "Did you clean, too?"

Derek shrugged. "Mark and I had some time on our hands today."

Addison was genuinely surprised. She had never known Derek to be the kind of guy who cleaned without being told to or threatened.

"Thank you."

- - - - - - - - - -

"Well," Addison said. "I must say that your cooking skills have improved since the days of medical school."

Derek turned to face her. "Excuse me," he retorted, feigning insult. "I have _always_ been a good cook."

"No. You haven't."

"You never complained before."

"I didn't want to hurt your feelings."

He laughed. "Since when do you care about that?"

"Yeah, you're right… what was I thinking?"

They went back to watching the terrible movie they had found on TV. In just a few hours, Addison and Derek had fallen back into the routine they had perfected many years before. It seemed as though this friends thing might actually work after all. Maybe.

"This is fun," Derek said, interrupting Addison's thoughts. "We haven't done this in a long time."

"Well, being divorced probably has something to do with that."

"You know what I mean, Addie. Even before… we never just sat together and did nothing. We were always too busy. Or _thought_ we were too busy."

"Mmmm," she murmured in agreement, not really knowing what to say.

"So… how do you feel about doing this again tomorrow? Maybe Mark and your sister would want to hang around this time."

Addison didn't respond immediately, and Derek looked at her curiously. "What is it?" he asked.

"I can't tomorrow."

"Why? You have a date?"

"Yes."

"Oh." He didn't say anything else.

"Don't do this, Derek."

"Do what?"

"Act all weird now. This is why I didn't tell you. We were getting along for the first time in… years. And now you're getting jealous. Derek, if you want to be my friend, you're going to have to act like a friend, not a jealous ex-husband."

"Yeah. Okay," he agreed reluctantly. "Sorry. I didn't mean to ruin the night."

"Get me some ice cream, and things are looking up," she grinned.

"It doesn't take much, does it?"

"No, not really."

- - - - - - - - - -

Addison rushed through the door the next night after being held up in traffic for over an hour because of a car accident on the highway. She had less than fifteen minutes before Pete would be by to pick her up, and she was not at all ready.

"Teagan!" she yelled, running up the stairs and into her room.

"At your service," Teagan said, sauntering into her sister's bedroom.

"I tried calling you on my way home, but my cell phone died, and Pete is going to be here soon, and I'm going to need you to find me something to wear while I re-do my make-up. Damn those people for making me cry today. I really am going soft."

Teagan just shook her head as she walked into Addison's closet. She rifled through Addison's extensive wardrobe trying to find something that wasn't too formal but not too casual either. She finally settled on a simple black dress and a pair of red heels.

"This okay?" she said, holding them up for Addison.

"No. Bad luck dress. Pick another."

Teagan sighed and quickly found another.

"Better?"

Addison quickly studied the dress and nodded. "Yes. Thank you."

She quickly finished her makeup and slipped into the dress, running a brush through her hair.

"Well, that will have to do, I guess."

"You look good, sis."

The doorbell rang, and Addison smiled at her sister before grabbing her purse and heading downstairs to answer.

"Hey," Teagan yelled after her. Addison stuck her head back in the room. "What was wrong with the other dress?"

She hesitated. "I bought it to wear for my birthday two years ago. I sat in it all night waiting for Derek to come home. He never did. I swore I'd never wear it again, but I couldn't bring myself to get rid of it." She smiled sadly.

"Have a good time tonight, Adds."

"I will."

- - - - - - - - - -

Teagan and Mark jumped when the door slammed shut a few hours later.

"Well. That was awkward," Addison said, dropping her purse, kicking off her shoes, and collapsing onto the empty chair.

"Why? What happened?"

"We had absolutely nothing to talk about. We sat there staring at each other for the better part of dinner. I think he was weirded out by the fact that Derek is still here." She stopped talking and looked around. "Where is Derek, by the way?"

"He's outside… still playing _Survivor: Los Angeles_," Mark answered. "I voted myself off the island for a few hours."

"Okay…" Addison said. "Anyway, when he dropped me off, he walked me to the door, and I could tell he wanted to kiss me but wasn't sure if he should. So I leaned in to make the first move… and then he shook my hand. He shook my freakin' hand."

Mark and Teagan snickered not-so-discretely.

"Stop laughing," Addison ordered. "I looked like a fool."

"Could be worse," Mark offered, not removing his eyes from the TV.

"Oh, really? Please. Enlighten me."

He slowly turned his head to look at her. "I don't actually have an example…"

"Worthless. If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go put my sweats on and contemplate how many cats I should buy tomorrow."

Teagan rolled her eyes. "Don't be so dramatic. It was your first date in like… a century. So it was bad… you'll figure it out again."

"Yeah. It's just… I used to be really good at this dating thing."

Mark scoffed. "Either that, or you and Derek were both equally bad at it."

- - - - - - - - - -

"Well?" Derek asked. "How'd her date go?"

"Not good," Mark told him, lying down on his cot.

"That's too bad."

"Yeah. Right. I'm sure you really mean that."

"I do," Derek lied. "She's my friend."

"Addison is more than just your friend, no matter what you try to tell yourself. And despite what she insists." Mark yawned. "Ugh. When are we getting out of here?"

"I'm glad you asked…" Derek said. "I talked to Richard today."

"No."

"Kind of asked him for more time off."

"Nooo."

"After _a lot_ of groveling and begging, I got us another few weeks off."

"Noooo!" Mark whined. "I wanna go home, Derek. I miss home. I miss the hospital. I miss my bed. I miss… what's-her-name."

"Go, then."

"You know I can't do that. I can't leave you here unsupervised. I have to make sure you don't piss Addison off even more than you have already. You can't be trusted not to do that on your own."

"She's not mad anymore," Derek insisted.

Mark looked at him and raised an eyebrow.

"Seriously. We're friends."

"Stop kidding yourself."

* * *

I really like the next chapter. It's Christmas-y. A little late, I know. But it's funny. At least I think so.

REVIEW!


	9. Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer

Um… I had something mildly entertaining to say, but I don't remember that that thing was now… so I guess I will just say thanks to everyone who reviewed last time and… enjoy.

Oh, and Kendel, there's something in here just for you…

* * *

_**Chapter 9  
**__**Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer**_

"Addison!" Derek called from the back door early Saturday morning. "I need to talk to you. Let me in!"

A few minutes later, a not-so-happy Addison appeared at the door with a hand on her hip.

"What?" she asked shortly.

"How much do you like me?"

"In general, or at this particular moment in time? Because right now, I'm not all that fond of you."

"I need you to do me a huge favor. And I would really appreciate it if you didn't yell at me when I tell you what it is."

"What is it?"

"Before I tell you, remember how much you love my Nana? My old, dear, sweet Nana? My Nana who never forgets your birthday and who always—"

"Cut to the chase, Derek," she said impatiently.

"I need you to come home with me for Christmas."

She eyed him curiously. "Why?"

He hesitated. "Nana doesn't know we're divorced," he said slowly and quietly.

"What?!" she screamed.

"I asked you not to yell…"

"I don't care! How can she _not_ know?!"

"I couldn't bring myself to tell her. It would kill her. And I kind of made everyone else promise not to tell her, either…"

"Derek!"

"You're yelling again."

"I can't believe this, Derek! I can't believe no one told her that we're not _married_ anymore."

Derek stood still while Addison paced the length of her kitchen.

"Addie… this could be her _last_ Christmas…"

"You've said that for the last _seven_ Christmases!"

He couldn't deny that.

"So, let me just make sure I understand what you're asking," she said. "You want me to drop _my_ plans and go with _you_ to your parents' house for Christmas while you and I and, oh yes, your _entire_ family, lie to your _grandmother _and pretend like we're still married so that she never knows we got a _divorce_?"

"Well, when you say it like _that_… that just makes it sound wrong."

"It _is_ wrong!"

"Addison. Do you want to be responsible for killing my 94-year-old Nana?"

"Derek!"

"Who has never done anything except love you?"

"Derek!"

"Addison, come on… please?"

"No. This is ridiculous."

"Okay, well… how about this? I, uh… I will buy and wrap all of your Christmas presents."

"You don't know _how_ to wrap presents. And you wouldn't buy the right stuff, anyway."

"Fine. Then… I will squeeze you fresh orange juice every morning."

"With extra pulp?"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Come on, Addie… please?" he begged. "For Nana?"

She glared at him. He _knew_ she wouldn't be able to say no if he threw that out there.

"I hate you."

Derek sighed in relief. "Thank you."

"But you have to buy my plane ticket."

"Done."

"And there will have to be rules."

"Okay."

"And you give me back my iPod."

"I… don't have your iPod…"

"Then I lost it. You buy me a new one."

"You got it."

Addison let out a frustrated groan. "Ugh! I can't believe I'm doing this. It will never work, Derek."

"Sure it will," he replied confidently.

"We are horrible liars."

"Maybe you are. But I'm not. I'm good at lying. I really did take your iPod."

He ducked as a very heavy magazine came hurtling toward his head.

- - - - - - - - - -

Two days later, Addison was packing to leave for New York.

"I can't believe he talked you into this," Teagan said as she watched her sister pack her suitcase.

"I can't believe you're being so useless. Help me pack," she said frantically. "We have to leave in 20 minutes, and I'm not anywhere close to being ready."

"This is why you don't wait until the last minute to pack."

"Well, excuse me if I've been a little busy lately with work and Christmas and pondering the happenings for my fake year of marriage."

"Fine. What do you need me to do?"

"Closet. Find me some warm clothes and weather-appropriate shoes."

Teagan disappeared into the closet as Addison continued pulling items from her dresser and throwing them into her suitcase.

"So, where did you tell Pete you were going?"

"I… uh… I didn't tell him anything."

"You don't think your boyfriend is going to wonder where you disappeared to for Christmas?"

"Well, the beauty of this is that he's not technically my boyfriend, so I don't have to explain anything to him."

"You live in a land of denial," Teagan said with a roll of her eyes.

"No. I don't. I'll call him after we land. If I do it before, I'm going to feel too guilty for leaving without saying anything."

"You're not going to feel guilty anyway?"

"Well, probably. But I'll be on the other side of the country and therefore unable to do anything about it. Speaking of guilt, are you sure you don't mind me leaving you at Christmas, Teag?"

"For the seventeenth time, it's _fine_. Mark and I are going to Sam's with him and Naomi and Maya, and the others will probably be over later in the day. We'll be fine. It's you I'm worried about."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence."

"Eh, you'll be fine," Teagan said as she emerged from the closet with an armful of clothing. "I hope," she muttered under her breath.

- - - - - - - - - -

Addison struggled down the stairs with her suitcase as the doorbell started to ring.

"Just a minute," she yelled.

Abandoning the suitcase, she went to the door to let Derek in.

"You ready?" he asked.

"Of course," she replied calmly.

Mark appeared from behind Derek and strolled casually into the house with a duffle bag in hand.

"And just what do you think you're doing?"

"I'm done with this _Man vs. Wild_ thing. I'm not sleeping alone out there, and Sam's only extra room belongs to Maya."

"Fine," Addison relented. "But you keep this house clean while I'm gone. And no women here, Mark. I'm serious."

"Yes, mother," he replied, plopping down on the couch and turning on a football game.

"Teagan, we're leaving," Addison called up the stairs.

She came down to say goodbye, bringing Addison's forgotten cosmetic bag with her.

"Forget something?"

"Thank you," Addison said, relieved.

"Got everything now?" Derek asked her.

"I hope so," she said, tucking a strand of hair behind her ears. Derek grabbed her hand.

"Where are your wedding rings?"

"I… I don't have them anymore."

He looked at her, and she could see the hurt that was evident in his eyes. But as quickly as it came, it was gone.

"Here," he said pulling a small box from his pocket.

She opened it, revealing a simple white gold band with many tiny diamonds inset. She looked up at him questioningly.

"If we're gonna do this, we're gonna do it right," he responded.

"And you just happened to have this lying around?"

"In case I ever need to barter for food," he said with a smile. "Let's go."

- - - - - - - - - -

Many hours later, their plane had touched down, they had found their luggage and a rental car, and Addison had called Pete, feeling mildly guilty for leaving and not telling him anything. She and Derek and then agreed on the details for their pretend year of marriage and were now on their way to Derek's parents' house in Connecticut.

"Thanks again for coming with me, Add."

"I'm doing it for Nana, Derek…"

"I know," he replied. "But thank you anyway."

"Yeah, yeah…" she yawned. "You owe me."

"Go to sleep."

She did as she was told and slept for the rest of the ride. A little while later, they were pulling into the driveway of the Shepherd house. There were already three cars in the driveway, which meant that almost everyone had already arrived.

_Oh, boy_, he thought, _here goes nothing_.

"Addison, we're here," he said, gently shaking her to wake her up.

"What? How long was I asleep for?"

"About an hour. Okay, so… you ready for this."

"Of course. You know they love me more than you," she said with a smirk.

"Alright, then… here goes nothing."

They got out of the car and made their way up to the front door. Derek quietly opened it, and they stepped inside.

"Hello? Where is everyone?"

As soon as he said that, he could hear an excited squeal coming from the kitchen, and soon enough, his mother had emerged, her hands and apron covered in flour.

"Ooooh!" Jane Shepherd shrieked when she saw them standing in the doorway.

"Bracing for impact…" Derek mumbled as she headed toward them. "Merry Chri—"

He abruptly stopped talking when he realized that his mother wasn't coming toward him. Jane bypassed Derek, who had his arms open to hug his mother, and went straight to Addison, enveloping her in a huge hug and getting flour all over her black coat.

"Addison! I'm so happy to see you! I wasn't sure you would agree to come, and here you are. Oh, you look so good, honey," Jane rambled.

"Hi, Mom," Derek muttered to himself as his mother hugged and fussed over Addison. "Good to see you, too… yes, I'm doing fine. How about yourself?"

"Oh, Derek, I almost forgot about you!" Jane said as she turned and hugged her son. "It's just so exciting that both of you kids are here. It's the best Christmas present I could have asked for. PATRICK!" she yelled a little too close to Derek's ear.

"Ouch! Okay, thank you, Mom. Now I'm deaf in one year."

"PATRICK!" she called again, trying to get the attention of Derek's father.

"What do you want?" they heard a muffled reply from the basement.

"Don't ask questions. Just get up here now!" Jane called back.

A few seconds later, they could hear him slowly trudging up the stairs. "Jane, I was showing the boys my new rifle. We're going turkey hunting later, and I have to teach David how to use it, unless you want us all to die. Now, what's so important?"

"Look who's here!" she said excitedly as he rounded the corner into the entryway.

"Well, aren't you two a sight for sore eyes?" he said, walking over to hug Derek and Addison. Just as Jane had done, he immediately bypassed his son and went straight to Addison.

"Hi, Dad," Addison greeted her former father-in-law.

"Merry Christmas, honey. So good to see you here," Patrick said.

"Well. I'm glad that my parents are so happy to see _their son_," Derek said sarcastically.

"You know I always hug the pretty one first," his dad replied, making Addison smile and blush a little. "Now shut up and give me a hug." He pulled Derek into a bear hug.

"Good to see you, Pops. How're you doing?"

"Doin' great. Jason, Matt, and I were just down in the basement teaching David how to use a rifle. For being such a smart guy, he's not all that knowledgeable about using a firearm. Kind of like you."

"Hey!" Derek said defensively. "I do alright."

Jane sniffled quietly from where she stood.

"What on God's green earth are you crying for, woman?" Patrick asked his wife.

"They came here _together_. It just makes me so happy!" she said in between her joyful sobs.

Patrick rolled his eyes. "Why don't we go get your bags out of the car?" he asked Derek.

"Sounds good."

They headed back outside when Addison hear another voice coming from the kitchen. "Ma, what was all that screaming about?" Jill asked as she emerged. "Oh, Addison! You're here!" she said, running up to give her former sister-in-law a hug. Jill was third in the Shepherd family line-up, in between Nancy and Derek.

"Hey, Jill! Merry Christmas," Addison greeted her.

"I'm so glad you came. We were all sure that you would never agree to Derek's idiotic plan."

"Yeah, well… I had vacation time and just couldn't pass up the opportunity to come home for Christmas," Addison told her with a smile. "Plus, I don't want to be responsible for killing Nana."

"Yeah, no kidding. I don't know what Derek was thinking not telling her. Nancy is supposed to pick her up and bring her over later, so—"

She was cut off by Kathleen's voice coming from the top of the stairs. "Addison? Is that you?"

"Merry Christmas, Kathleen," she answered. Kathleen was the oldest of the Shepherd children, and although she had been the least understanding when everything happened between Derek and Addison, they had managed to patch things up after the divorce.

"Hey, sis. Where's our wayward brother?"

"He and Dad went out to the car to bring in the bags."

As if on cue, the front door opened, revealing Derek and Patrick lugging the suitcases into the house.

"Hey, loser. Glad you decided to come home for Christmas," Jill greeted her baby brother.

"Ahhh! Addie, I thought I heard you!" exclaimed Amy as she entered the now-crowded entryway. Amy was the baby of the bunch.

"Hi, Ames!" Addison said as she hugged her.

"Okay, you all need to move before I drop this suitcase on one of you. In case you've all forgotten, Addison doesn't know how to travel lightly."

"Honey, why don't you put Addison's stuff up in your old room? We'll have to find a place for yours later, I guess," his mother told him.

Derek sighed. Leave it to his mother and her conservative Connecticut upbringing. It was alright for the family to pretend that he and Addison were still married to fool his grandmother, but God forbid they sleep in the same bed, despite the 12 years of marriage they once shared.

While Derek and Patrick got all of the luggage put away. Addison was pulled into the kitchen with Jane, Kathleen, Jill, and Amy. Their kids were in there decorating Christmas cookies, and if they weren't supervised, things would quickly spiral out of control. Seven kids, ranging from age 1 to 13, was a recipe for disaster, anyway.

"Where are Nancy and Jeremy and the girls?" Addison asked.

"Oh, you know Nancy… always late for everything. She was supposed to be here over an hour ago with Nana."

"Who cares about Nancy?" Amy said, changing the subject. "Tell us about California. How do you like it?"

"It's… different. Not bad different. Just not quite what I expected."

The women continued to talk while the kids decorated cookies. During some point, the men had emerged from the basement, declaring that they were leaving to do some "manly bonding." Derek elected to stay behind. He had never been a huge fan of hunting, and he had no desire to sit out in the cold waiting for a turkey to cross their paths. Besides, he knew Addison would skin him alive if he had left her there with his sisters when Nana arrived. After all, that was the whole reason Addison had agreed to come along in the first place, and if she was going to lie to the poor, delusional old woman, so was Derek.

- - - - - - - - - -

"This isn't your house, Nancy. Did you move?" they heard a voice come from the entryway.

"No, Nana. This is Mom and Dad's house. I told you we were coming here, remember?"

"Oh, yes… must have slipped my mind…"

Derek stood from the table and nudged Addison, signaling for her to follow him into the other room. She sighed heavily and stood up, wondering again why she ever agreed to do this.

"Hi, Nana," Derek greeted her with a hug. "Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas, handsome. I'm so glad you came all the way here to spend Christmas with your old granny."

"Where else would I be, Nana?" he asked with a smile.

"Well, I don't know… you didn't come see me last year…"

Derek heard Jill mumble behind him, "Pack your bags, D. You're going on a guilt trip."

He chose to ignore her.

"Addison and I couldn't get the time off last year after just starting new jobs and everything."

"Oh. Well, that's reasonable, I suppose. Even though I am 133 years old and could drop dead at any minute."

Derek rolled his eyes.

Nana looked around at the crowd that had gathered. "Where is that beautiful wife of yours?"

"Right here, Nana," Addison spoke up, walking over to hug the old woman.

"It's good to see you, dear. Are you eating? You look too skinny."

"Yes, Nana, I'm eating."

"It doesn't look like you're eating. You're just skin and bones."

"I'm eating. I promise. Someone tell her that I eat."

"And you're tan." She turned to Derek. "She's tan. Why is she so tan?"

Derek and Addison looked back and forth between each other while his sisters stood by with amused looks on their faces.

"I, uh…" Addison stammered.

"I hope you're not doing that fake tanning like all the kids are doing these days. It's not good for your skin, dear. You should know that; you're a doctor."

"Yes, Nana, I know."

"And when are you two going to make me a great-grandmother? I won't be around forever, you know."

"Nana, you have _nine_ great-grandchildren already," Kathleen pointed out.

"But with his hair and her bone structure… my God, that would be a beautiful child."

"Okay, Nana," Nancy interrupted. "Let's get you settled in before you unintentionally insult anyone else."

"Oh, dear… did I say something wrong?" Nana asked innocently as she ushered her out of the room, and the rest of the clan slowly followed.

Derek turned to Addison and said, "Well… so far, so good."

She glared at him.

- - - - - - - - - -

Derek headed down to the basement a while later to get his things put away. The basement was home to a pull-out couch circa 1975 that had definitely seen better days. And that would be Derek's bed for the next three nights.

"Hey," Nancy's voice came from the doorway.

Derek jumped. "Damnit, Nancy. Make some noise or something on your way down the stairs. I think I just had a mild heart attack."

"Oh, quit being so dramatic."

"What do you want?"

"Did you get Addison anything for Christmas?"

He stared at her. "We're divorced."

"Yeah. So?"

"So… that means I am under no obligation to buy her Christmas gifts anymore."

"Well, I think Nana might notice if her favorite granddaughter-in-law has no gifts from her 'husband' on Christmas. You're the brain surgeon, Derek. I thought you had this all figured out."

"I do. We're just going to tell her that we left the gifts at home because it didn't make sense to drag them all the way across the country."

"You are so damn stupid. Did twelve years of marriage teach you nothing? You _always_ have a gift for your wife on Christmas. No matter what. Come on. We're going into town."

- - - - - - - - - -

By the time Derek and Nancy had gone into town and back, Derek had developed an awful headache, and his only thoughts had to do with getting far, far away from his sister. He swore that she talked so much just because she liked the sound of her own voice. She chattered about how glad she was to see him and Addison and about his job and her job and her kids and when was he going to get his hair cut and how the color of his sweater didn't really work for him and just about every other topic imaginable.

He got out of the car and walked up to the door, not even bothering to wait for Nancy. He closed the door in her face and ignored her whining as she bypassed the living room and went into the kitchen.

He plopped down on the couch next to Kathleen, who was watching an old Christmas movie on TV with some of the kids. He had an exasperated look on his face, and his eyes were focused on nothing in particular.

"Have a nice trip into town, bro?" she asked snidely.

"That woman never stops talking. Not even to take a breath. I swear she has gills or something."

"If you would have brought a gift for Addison in the first place, you never would have to endure her incessant chatter."

"Shut up."

"Addison was asking where you went."

"Where is she now?"

"Downstairs watching the game with the boys. And Nana, who probably has no idea what's going on."

Derek smiled. Despite the fact that they were divorced, Addison still seemed to be enjoying spending time with his family. He didn't know why it surprised him, though. She had always been closer to his family than she had her own.

"What are you smiling about?" Kathleen asked him. "I thought you guys were just putting on this show for Nana. Don't tell me you've finally realized what an ass you were."

Derek didn't respond.

"Oh, you did. And let me guess… she won't take you back. Karma's a bitch."

She had that smug, all-knowing look on her face that Derek hated so much. He glared at her and stood up to leave.

"Hey, Nancy?" Derek called into the kitchen. "Kathleen wants to talk to you. Something about who's driving to church tomorrow night…"

He knew this would get Nancy going off on a variety of tangents that would keep her talking to Kathleen for a good fifteen minutes. At least. He smirked at his handiwork and left his oldest sister sitting on the couch with an angry look as Nancy came in to talk her ear off, and he sauntered downstairs.

- - - - - - - - - -

The rest of the evening was relatively uneventful, which was surprising considering that when the Shepherd household was full, it was usually a given that chaos would ensue.

By 10:00, however, most of the kids were getting tired and were cranky, and Momma Shepherd declared that it was bedtime for everyone. Derek helped Nana upstairs to her room while Addison followed. After saying goodnight to his grandmother, Derek headed back downstairs.

"Derek?" Nana called after him. "Where are you going? Your room is up here."

"I was… uh… just going to get some water."

"Nonsense. You go spend time with your wife. You can get water later."

He opened his mouth to argue with her, but she pointed a finger at him and said, "Go!"

Derek knew there was no sense in disagreeing with her, so he opened the door to Addison's room and went in.

"Hey!" she shouted as the door closed. "I'm changing."

That she was. She was facing him, wearing only her bra and a pair of pajama pants. He stared a little longer than appropriate before answering.

"Sorry. Nana refused to go in her room until I came in."

"Oh," Addison answered, pulling one of Derek's old t-shirts over her head. "Okay."

He sat down on the bed, and she joined him a few seconds later.

"So…" he began.

"Thanks for asking me to come," she said abruptly.

He looked at her, surprised by what she had said. "Uh… you're welcome."

"I didn't realize how much I had missed everyone until I spent time with them. It's good to be home."

He tilted her chin upward so that they were looking at each other in the eye, and he leaned forward.

"Derek," she whispered.

He shook his head. "For appearance sake."

He captured her lips with his own and kissed her slowly and meaningfully. She was hesitant at first but then began kissing him back, opening her mouth to allow his tongue to slip inside. A few moments later, they pulled apart.

"'Night, Addie," Derek said softly as he quietly left the room.

Addison just sat on bed dumbfounded by what had just happened.

"Whoa."

* * *

I'm pretty sure it would be beneficial for you to review. Because I know what's going to happen in the next chapter, and I think all of you would probably like to know, too…. 

Push the button.


	10. Sexy Mistake

Yeah. It's been almost two weeks. I'm back at school, so I blame that. Apparently if I want to graduate this spring, I have to do all this work. Huh. Who would've thought…

And thanks to Kendel for her help during my brain fart.

Just fair warning – this chapter is a little more PG-13ish than the last.

Okay, read.

* * *

_**Chapter 10  
**__**Sexy Mistake**_

"Up, up, up!" a little voice called as it descended down the basement stairs.

Before Derek had time to brace himself, Jill's daughter Caitlyn had jumped on his stomach, effectively knocking the air right out of him.

"Out of bed, lazy head," she chanted, smiling innocently down at him.

"Who told you to come jump on me, sweetie? I know you didn't think of this on your own."

She answered sweetly, "Aunt Nancy."

"Well, you better go back upstairs and tell her that if she isn't nicer then Santa isn't going to bring her anything tonight."

Caitlyn gasped. "He would really do that?" she asked worriedly.

"Only to Aunt Nancy," Derek reassured her. "So, go tell her."

"Okay!" And with that, she was gone as fast as she had come.

Derek sat up on the pull-out bed, trying to stretch out his back. He _hated_ sleeping down here. He couldn't remember the last time he had been forced to, and with the way his back was feeling, he wasn't sure how he was going to make it for two more nights.

He grabbed a change of clothes before heading upstairs to shower. His sisters and Addison were all in the kitchen as he passed through. She avoided eye contact with him as he passed.

"Whoa, nice hair, bro. Sleep well downstairs?" Amy asked, mocking Derek's hair that was sticking up in every direction. She knew how uncomfortable the pull-out was and knew he had probably spent most of the night tossing and turning.

"Yeah, usually we have to do something really bad to be banned to the basement. You'd think Mom would be happy you came home," Jill chimed in.

"Well," Nancy interjected. "He _did_ bring Addison with him, and we all know that Mom has always loved her more than him…"

"Yes, true."

"Have I told you all yet how much I've missed you?" he asked.

"Um… no," Nancy answered.

"Good. Oh, and thanks for the wake-up call, by the way," he said, eyeing Nancy. "Don't think I won't be getting you back for that."

"I was only trying to help," she said defensively. "Nana will probably be up soon, and although she is pretty old and a little crazy, she would probably notice if you wandered through the kitchen like this when she was here."

Derek sighed and chose not to respond, instead turning to Addison.

"Hey, Addie, can I talk to you for a sec?"

She stood and followed him into the next room, out of earshot from his sisters.

"What's going on?" he asked.

"What, uh… what do you mean?"

"You. You wouldn't look or talk to me in there. I know I caught you off-guard last night, and I'm sorry if it made you uncomfortable. Okay?"

"Okay," she answered softly.

"So, do you think you can look at me and at least pretend like you like me for the next couple days? For Nana?"

She sighed. "Yes, of course."

"Thank you," he said, touching her arm.

"Go shower, stinky," she responded with a smile.

- - - - - - - - - -

Christmas Eve flew by relatively quickly. Addison volunteered to help Jane and Kathleen cook dinner, which had helped to keep her a good distance from her ex-husband for the better part of the day.

It wasn't that she didn't want to be around him. He had actually been relatively pleasant lately, and she had realized that maybe she had been missing him a little. But that kiss. It had definitely thrown her for a curve, resurfacing old feelings, both good and bad. And she was having a hard time figuring out what to do with those feelings.

Derek had watched her throughout the day interacting with his family. He loved how well she still fit in. And he knew he was lucky. Very few women would have agreed to do what she did for him. But he wanted more, and he didn't know how to convince her of that.

Eventually, his nieces and nephews had drug him outside to help them build a snowman, and he had willingly obliged. Not only did it get him away from his sisters, who unfortunately had not lost their ability to talk non-stop in the last year or so, but it distracted him from thinking about Addison. He wished _his_ life was as simple as whether to give Frosty a top hat or a baseball cap.

Addison had been watching him through the window, though unaware of for how long. Jane had noticed the look on the face of her former daughter-in-law, and simply smiled at her when Addison realized she was watching her.

"What?" Addison asked.

"Nothing. It's just nice to have him home," Jane said casually.

"Yeah."

"Everything okay, dear?"

"What? Yeah. Of course. Why wouldn't it be?"

Jane shrugged. "I don't know. You just seem a little distracted today."

Addison forced a smile and told her, "Just tired."

The look on Jane's face made it perfectly clear that she knew or at least had a pretty good idea about what was going on, but Addison was grateful when she didn't press the issue any further.

- - - - - - - - - -

Dinner passed by in its traditional chaotic manner with the usual bickering and laughing at the "grown-up" table and the mandatory juice spilling and crying kids at the other table.

After dinner was finished and the dishes were done, everyone gathered in the living room to open their traditional Christmas Eve presents: pajamas. Patrick and Jane had started this tradition with their kids when they were little, and it had continued every year, even though there were now many more "kids" to buy for.

Soon after, everyone disappeared to get changed for the Christmas Eve service at church, and after a brief argument over who didn't want to drive and who was riding with whom, they were finally on their way. Derek had motioned to Addison while his sisters had been arguing, and they had quietly slipped away and taken off by themselves.

"Close call," Addison said soon after they had left the house.

"No kidding. There was no way we were going to ride with any of my sisters. I love them and everything, but even being in the same house with them is starting to get confining, not to mention being in the same mini-van."

Addison let out a small laugh and leaned her head back against the seat, pretending not to notice when Derek snuck a peak at her out of the corner of his eye.

"You look beautiful tonight, Addie."

She blushed a little, despite her best attempts not to be flustered by him. "Thanks. You look pretty good yourself, mister."

They made it to the church a few minutes before the rest of the clan and went inside to save a couple pews. Soon enough, the rest of the family had filed in, and the service had begun. Derek and Addison sat together in the second pew, close enough so that Nana wouldn't have any reason for suspicion, but not close enough so that his sisters would give him a hard time about it later (as Nana was prone to nodding off about halfway through the service).

After a while, though, Derek began to care less about what his sisters were thinking, and as they were all standing and singing _O, Holy Night_, he reached for Addison's hand and laced his fingers with hers. She looked at him, and he gave her hand a squeeze, but she didn't pull away. He let go when they sat back down to listen to the sermon, and she surprised him by reaching for his hand again.

At the end of the service, as the entire congregation held their individual candles and sang _Silent Night_, Derek snuck another glance at Addison, thinking about how gorgeous she looked in the candlelight and how her voice sounded beautiful as she sang along. For the first time in as long as he could remember, he sent up a prayer, asking God for just one more chance to make everything right again.

- - - - - - - - - -

Later that night after everyone else had gone to bed, Addison sat on the couch in the living room watching the snow fall outside the window. She couldn't sleep. There were too many thoughts running through her head, and she was having a hell of a time sorting them out. She was mad at Derek for kissing her and resurfacing all of these old feelings, and she was angry with herself for stupidly holding his hand all throughout the service, possibly making him believe that she was interested in something that she actually was not.

Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard footsteps behind her. Turning around, she watched as Derek entered the living room. He didn't notice her at first, as the only lights illuminating the room were coming from the tree in the corner, but he soon noticed her on the couch and stopped in his tracks.

"Hey."

"Hi," she answered.

"Nice PJs," he said, nodding at the black and white plaid pajamas she had received earlier that evening.

"You, too."

"What are you doing down here?"

She shrugged. "Can't sleep. You?"

"Same."

He sat down in the chair across from the couch, and she turned her attention back to the snow outside. Anything to keep from looking at him and saying or doing something she might regret.

"What's wrong?" he asked after a few moments of uncomfortable silence.

"Nothing."

"Bull. Something's bothering you. What is it?"

"I said it's nothing," she answered, now a little more irritated.

"And I said I don't believe you. What's wrong?"

"You!" she exclaimed.

"What did I do?"

"You kissed me! And it's messing with my mind. I moved away from you because it was _too hard_ to be around you _all the time_ and not be _with_ you. _Too hard_ to see you with someone else, who, by the way, I'm hoping you're not still with because that would make this little trip about ten times _more_ inappropriate than it already is. And _then_, when I finally think I've moved on and gotten over you, you show up on my doorstep. And you convince me to come home with you. And then you _kiss_ me. And I don't know what to _think_ anymore."

"Then let me simplify things for you," he said firmly, standing from the chair and moving closer to her. "You left without saying goodbye. Fifteen years of history and _nothing_. You were just gone. I tried to move on and be with Meredith, but I couldn't stop thinking about you. So no, Addison, she and I are not together. I _missed_ you. So I got in my car and drove down to see you. And I don't regret it. I don't regret bringing you here, and I don't regret kissing you. I want to be with _you_."

Addison's eyes had begun to tear up as she listened to him. But she still wasn't convinced.

"Where was this a year ago, Derek? I was right in front of your face. And you just pretended like I didn't exist. So how you expect me to believe anything you're saying now?"

"Because it's true!"

She shook her head. "I can't trust you anymore, Derek," she whispered. "I just… can't."

He took a step closer to her, and she looked the other direction.

"Addison. Look at me."

She blinked but didn't move her eyes.

"Look. At. Me."

She did.

"I'm sorry for breaking your trust. And I'm sorry for hurting you. But I'm here now. And I'm begging you to at least _try_."

He sat down next to her and reached for her hand, rubbing his thumb against her skin. She then noticed the ring on his finger. The same ring she had placed there so many ago. He hadn't gotten rid of it. She had thrown hers in Elliot Bay, but he still had his.

"You still have your ring."

"Yeah. I do."

"I thought for sure you'd gotten rid of it."

"I tried to," he admitted. "But I never could."

She looked down at her own left hand, examining the ring he had given her to wear the other day.

"What's this?" she asked, holding up her hand.

Derek sighed. "_That_ is what I bought you for Christmas last year. I couldn't work up the courage to give it to you, not after what I said to you. So I was going to give it to you for your birthday instead… but by then, everything had gone to hell. So I just held onto it. Didn't really know what else to do with it."

He took her left hand and spun the ring around on her finger. "There are fifteen diamonds in it. Fourteen for all the years we'd been together, and one for all the others that were to come."

His voice sounded sad. She looked up and met his eyes, and he slowly but surely leaned toward her. When she didn't move away, he kissed her softly. She didn't kiss him back at first, but when he cupped her face with his hands, she began to respond.

She stood and he followed suit, managing not to break the kiss as they walked toward the stairs leading to the basement.

As they reached the top of the stairs, Derek pulled Addison into his arms, then reached behind, grabbing her thighs and pulling her upward. She wrapped her legs around his waist, continuing to kiss him as he carried her down the stairs.

He closed and locked the door when they reached the bottom of the stairs and then carried Addison over to the bed and gently set her down. He took her hands in his and whispered quietly, "Are you sure?"

"I'm not sure of anything anymore," she replied before pulling him toward her and kissing him deeply.

She began to undo the buttons on his pajama top. She slowly slipped the shirt off his shoulders and down his arms, letting it fall to the floor. She pulled him on top of her as she fell backward into the bed.

He met her lips with his, parting them with his tongue as he kissed her, all the while slowly undoing the buttons on her pajama top, tossing it aside after pulling it from her arms. He pulled back, admiring her in the dim light. He slipped his hands under the thin tank top she was wearing underneath and began to remove it as well. He planted a trail of kisses from her navel up to her neck as he slipped her shirt off and discarded it on the floor along with his own.

He kissed down her neck as she ran her hands through his hair, and he slowly made his way to the spot behind her ear that he knew drove her crazy. Addison let out a soft moan and arched her back slightly as Derek began removing her pajama bottoms and panties. He tossed them aside as she grabbed his face, pulling him in for a deep, sensuous kiss. She pulled back slightly, meeting his eyes as she took off his pants and boxers.

They lay together, skin on skin, briefly meeting each other's eyes before Derek attacked Addison's mouth with his own. She had one hand in his hair and the other was roaming his back. He slowly moved his hands up and down her sides and thighs before pulling her as close to him as he could and sliding inside her. She let out soft moans as he moved rhythmically with her. She wrapped her legs around his, moving her right leg up and down his left, and pressed her fingers hard into his back. Her toes began to curl as she felt wave after wave sweeping over her. She moaned into his mouth as the last one came.

Derek rolled onto his side, pulling Addison close. He pulled the thick comforter over both of them and then laced his fingers with hers and planted kisses on her forehead as she drifted off to sleep.

"I love you, Addie," he whispered.

She pretended to be asleep.

- - - - - - - - - -

"Merry Christmas, Derek. Get your ass out of bed and come help me put the rest of the presents under the tree," Nancy called out as she barged into the basement early Christmas morning and flipped on the light.

Two heads shot up from the pull-out bed at the sound of her voice, clearly confused and disoriented at the foreign voice in the basement.

"Oh, my… well, it's a Merry Christmas, indeed, eh, little bro?" Nancy said smugly as she saw Addison tangled up in the bed with him and clothes discarded beside them.

"How did you get in here?" Derek asked confused. "I made sure to lock the door."

"Please, Derek. You underestimate me. Have you forgotten that I am the master of getting into places that I'm not supposed to be? Remember your trailer? All I had to do was jimmy a paper clip in that cheap lock and—"

He cut her off. "I don't care. Get out!"

"I'll get out, but you might want to consider the fact that Mom will be up any minute now, and she may not find this situation quite as amusing as I do. Just a thought." With a smug, all-knowing look, Nancy went back upstairs.

"Ugh. She's right, as much as I hate to admit it," Derek said, flopping back down on the bed.

"Yeah… I should sneak back upstairs before your parents or your other sisters are up," Addison replied, knowing how his sisters would have a field day if they saw her leaving the basement this early in the morning.

She sat up and grabbed her clothes from where they had landed the night before, and Derek just lay on the bed, watching her dress.

"You're beautiful," he said.

"You're just saying that because you got some last night," she said, winking at him. She quickly finished dressing and began to head up the stairs.

"Wait!" Derek called out.

"What?"

He wrapped a blanket around his waist and walked over to her, pulling her in closely and kissing her intensely. After a good half-minute later, he pulled away.

"Merry Christmas," Derek whispered.

"Um… yeah… you, too. I, uh… yeah…" she stammered as she began climbing the stairs.

Derek watched her go before getting dressing himself and going upstairs. _Merry Christmas, indeed_, he thought.

- - - - - - - - - -

Back up in her room, Addison flopped down on the bed and stared at the ceiling. For the life of her, she couldn't figure out what had possessed her to jump in bed with her ex-husband. In his parents' house, nonetheless. And then being caught by Nancy… well, that was just the icing on the messiest, most complicated cake ever.

_I can't do this_, she decided. Getting involved with Derek again simply wouldn't work. She would play the part of the loving wife until they left tomorrow afternoon, and then she would tell Derek it had all been a mistake. That she got wrapped up in the moment. That holidays make people nostalgic and cause them to do things they wouldn't normally do otherwise. And a plethora of other reasons. Anything to convince him that she never meant for it to happen.

She couldn't go down that road again.

- - - - - - - - - -

Christmas morning passed by in its usual frenzy. In no time, wrapping paper was being thrown everywhere, and the kids were squealing excitedly at their presents.

Addison sat quietly in the rocking chair, holding baby Natalie, the daughter of Derek's youngest sister Amy and her husband Matt. When Derek wasn't playing Santa and handing out presents to the kids, he had been watching her as she rocked back and forth with the baby and happily watched the rest of the kids.

She'd been trying not to acknowledge the fact that she knew Derek had been watching her, even though he was making it blatantly obvious. She was hoping and praying that Nancy hadn't said anything to the others about what she had witnessed that morning, and so far it seemed as though she hadn't, but if Derek kept looking at her like _that_, they were going to figure it out sooner rather than later.

"This one," Derek said, reaching under the tree for the next present, "is for Addie."

Addison looked at him questioningly. "What?"

"Merry Christmas," he said, handing it over to her.

"Here," Amy walked over to her. "I'll take Nat so you can open your gift."

Addison reluctantly handed over the sleeping baby and began ripping the paper off the package. Underneath the paper was a deep red cashmere blanket. She looked at Derek.

"You like it?" he asked.

"Yeah. I do," she said, still surprised. "Thank you."

He smiled at her. "You're welcome."

Derek continued to hand out the rest of the gifts, and Addison ran her hands absently over the blanket, wondering what had prompted Derek to buy it for her. They had agreed – no presents. She had a strong suspicion that Derek had had some help with the gift, but that didn't totally stop her from feeling a little excited about it.

And for just a moment, she completely forgot about everything she had been thinking earlier.

- - - - - - - - - -

"What is this all about?" Addison confronted Derek later, holding up the blanket.

"It's Christmas. Giving gifts is kind of a tradition," he answered with a grin.

"You know what I mean. Why did you buy me a gift?"

He shrugged. "I thought you should have _something_ to open on Christmas."

"_You_ thought? Or someone thought for you?"

"I may have had help," he admitted. "But I picked it out all on my own. Nancy even gave her approval."

Addison didn't respond.

"Are you mad?" Derek asked tentatively.

She sighed. "I don't know what I am."

He looked disappointed.

"I really do like the blanket, Derek," she said, taking notice of how sad he looked.

"Good. I'm glad."

They sat side by side for a few minutes, neither of them speaking. He glanced at her occasionally, but Addison just stared straight ahead, seemingly lost in thought.

Finally, Derek said, "I don't regret it."

She knew he wasn't referring to the present. She didn't say anything.

- - - - - - - - - -

Addison sat alone at the kitchen table early the next morning, sipping her coffee and thinking. As much as she appreciated, and even liked, Derek's gift to her, she almost wished he hadn't gotten anything for her. He was trying to make an effort again; that much was clear. But one gift didn't make up for everything he had put her through before. She still had to tell him that it had been a mistake. But now it was going to be about ten times harder.

She was so lost in thought that she didn't notice that Nana had entered the kitchen until she sat down next to her.

"What's on your mind, dear?" she asked Addison.

Addison looked over at her and forced a smile. "Nothing. I'm fine."

"You're a terrible liar."

"I'm not lying," she protested.

"Honey, please. I may be old and a little senile, but despite what my grandchildren may believe, I'm still aware of what's going on."

Addison looked at her timidly. "You know?"

"How could I _not_ know?"

"I don't know… it's just… everyone thinks…"

"I know what everyone thinks," Nana said. "For the past year, they've avoided talking about you two around me. They think I'm better off being kept in the dark. I've just let them believe that I am."

"So you've known this whole time?"

"Of course, dear. You two put on a good show the past few days, I have to say. It was a worthy effort."

She paused and then said, "Anyway, it's not important that I know. What's more important is what _you_ are going to do."

"About what?"

"Your feelings for my grandson."

"There are no feelings," Addison denied. "We're divorced. We've both moved on."

Nana shook her head. "Addison. Listen to me. There is nothing worse in life than not doing something that could bring you happiness. That kind of regret… well, it'll eat you alive. Just follow your heart, honey. That's all you can really do. And the little details… they'll work themselves out."

- - - - - - - - - -

Derek and Addison sat together at the airport later that day. He looked over at her. She had her nose in a book, pretending to read, but looking at the page number, he could tell that she'd been on the same page for the past fifteen minutes. He sighed, frustrated.

Addison had barely talked to him since they left his parents' house. She had, of course, spent last night talking with his mother and sisters and had even managed to act as though everything were normal this morning at breakfast. She had hugged everyone goodbye and promised to visit again soon.

But since they had left the house… nothing.

An hour or so later, they had boarded the plane, and Derek couldn't take the silence anymore.

"Addison. Talk to me. Tell me something. Anything."

Nothing.

"Add. I meant what I said the other night. I don't want to lose you again."

She didn't move, but Derek could see a tear run down her cheek.

She finally answered, her voice barely above a whisper.

"I can't trust you anymore."

* * *

I don't know if you caught that, but they had sex. In his parents' house. And now Addison's more confused than ever.

I'm confused, too.

I'm not quite sure where I want to go with this, and since school has decided to take over my life as of next week, updates won't be as frequent. But I WILL finish this story. It just may take a while.

REVIEW, por favor.


	11. Goodbye, My Lover

Okay, so, two chapters ago, I give you a kiss. One measly kiss. And I get 18 reviews. THEN, last time, I gave you Addek sex. And I get 11 reviews. What's the deal with that, peeps?

Anyway, here it is. Sorry it took so long. I avoided this for like... a week. Whoops.

Ready, set, read.

* * *

_**Chapter 11  
**__**Goodbye, My Lover**_

Teagan and Mark had taken up residence in the living room when Addison walked through the door that night. Both heads turned at the unexpected sound.

"What are you doing here?" Teagan asked. "I thought you were going to call when you landed so I could come get you."

Addison shrugged. "Took a cab instead." She dragged her suitcase out of the way, threw her purse on the table, and took a seat in the chair across from where her sister and Mark were sitting, not actually looking at them. They glanced at each other, confused.

"Why would you pay for a cab when we're perfectly capable of picking you up?" Mark asked. "And where's Derek?"

"Don't know. Sam's. I think."

"Addison, what's going on?" Teagan asked worriedly.

"Nothing," Addison lied. "I'm tired. I've been on a plane all day, and I'm still on east coast time. That's it."

Mark gave her a look. "You also look like you haven't slept in two days."

"I'm fine," she insisted.

"So, how'd it go?" Teagan asked her, knowing Addison wasn't going to admit something was wrong. At least not yet.

Addison forced a smile and replied, "Good. Better than expected, actually. It was nice to see everyone again."

"Well, good. At least it wasn't a total bust then."

"Mmm," Addison mumbled.

"You did something naughty, didn't you?" Mark inquired with a smirk playing across his face.

"Believe it or not, Mark, s_ome_ people are actually capable of keeping their pants _on_," she snapped, failing to mention that she was apparently not one of those people. She raised an eyebrow. "You didn't sleep with my sister, did you?"

"What? No!" Teagan exclaimed.

"I _tried_," Mark whined. "She wouldn't let me."

Addison shook her head. "Good for her. So, who _did_ you sleep with, then?"

Mark tried to look offended. "Why do you automatically assume that I slept with someone? It's possible for me to come down here to visit some old friends and just have a good time. No sex involved."

"It's possible, just not _probable_," she pointed out. "What's her name?"

"No one."

"Mark."

"I know," Teagan interjected.

"Shut it, squirt," Mark threatened.

"Mark, _please_ tell me it wasn't someone I work with. _Please_."

Teagan smirked, and Mark didn't say anything.

"I _hate_ you," Addison stated. "I'm going to bed. Keep it in your pants for the night, please, if you could."

Addison trudged up the stairs and into her room, closing the door behind her. After changing into her pajamas, she grabbed her laptop and climbed into bed to check her e-mail.

_To: Addison Montgomery  
__From: Callie Torres  
__Sent: December 23  
__Subject: __(none)_

_Hey. I've been trying to call you, but your cell is either off __or__ you let the battery die. Again. Anyway, I just wanted to make sure you're doing okay since I just found out that the ex and his trusty sidekick were in town. I would have called earlier, but no one tells me anything. Call me when you get a chance. If you need me to come down there and kick some ass, say the word and I'm on the next plane. Miss you. Merry Christmas._

_Callie_

Addison reached for her phone on the nightstand and quickly dialed the familiar number.

"Hello?" came the voice on the other end a few seconds later.

"Hey," Addison said softly.

"Where have you been?" Callie demanded. "I've been trying to get a hold of you for days."

Addison sighed. "Long story."

"I've got time."

- - - - - - - - - -

Derek walked out to the beach, shuffling his feet slowly through the sand. He looked over to the spot where he and Mark had been camping prior to Christmas and was grateful when he saw that Mark had already torn down camp and put the tent away. Just one less thing he'd have to do in the morning.

"Hey."

Derek turned at the voice coming from behind. Mark was standing a few feet away, his arms crossed and a concerned look on his face.

"Hey," Derek responded quietly.

"You okay, man?"

"Yeah. Fine. Why?"

Mark shrugged. "Something's off."

Derek sighed heavily but chose not to say anything.

Mark kept prodding. "Everything okay with you and Addison?"

"Fine."

Mark raised an eyebrow. "You're lying. What happened?"

Derek shrugged. "She can't trust me. Simple as that."

"Derek. C'mon man. You don't give up that easily."

"I'm not giving up," Derek replied sadly. "It's just time to… let go. No more playing around on the beach. It's time to go home and get back to our real lives."

Mark looked at him curiously. There was more to this than what Derek was telling him, but past experience had taught him that if Derek didn't want to tell you something, it was best not to push him.

"Okay. Then we'll leave in the morning, if that's what you want."

"Yeah. Okay," Derek agreed, even though that was the last thing he wanted.

"Okay."

- - - - - - - - - -

Teagan was walking down the hall to her room when she noticed Addison's light was still on. She knocked quietly on her sister's door before slowly opening it.

"Can I come in?"

Addison looked up from the book she was reading. "Yeah."

Teagan flopped down on the bed next to Addison and stared up at her sister.

"What's wrong, Add?"

"Everything," she finally admitted, setting her book aside and cuddling down into the soft blanket Derek had given her.

"Okay… think you can narrow that down a little bit?"

"I had sex with Derek," Addison blurted out.

Teagan's eyes widened. "What? When?"

"Two days ago."

"At his parents' house?"

Addison nodded.

"And?"

"I don't know. It seemed so… right. You know? But after everything we've been through… I can't deal with that again. I don't know how I can ever trust him again. He's saying all these perfect things, and the last time he promised me something remotely close to what he's been saying lately… well, we ended up divorced."

Teagan looked at her sympathetically and said gently, "People change, Addie."

Addison didn't reply. She pulled the blanket up further around her shoulders and stared aimlessly out the window.

"Christmas present?" Teagan asked, holding up a corner of the blanket.

Addison nodded.

"You didn't have sex near this blanket, did you? Because these things have to be dry-cleaned. "

Addison cracked a smile despite herself. "I'm really glad you're here, Teag," she said sincerely.

"That's kind of something I wanted to talk to you about…" Teagan said tentatively.

"What?"

She hesitated. "The _real_ reason I went to Seattle last month was to check out the University of Washington. I talked to one of the counselors there… and the program they have is really great. And all of my credits from UConn will transfer."

Addison felt sick. "So you're telling me…"

"I'm moving to Seattle, Add. Classes start in two weeks."

- - - - - - - - - -

There was a sharp knock on the back door the next morning. Addison sat her coffee cup down and went to open the door.

Derek stared back at her with tired eyes. Clearly he didn't get much sleep last night, either.

"Hi," he said despondently.

"Hey."

"I, uh… I'm going home today."

"Yeah," Addison said. "Mark told me."

Derek nodded. "I wanted to come by and thank you again for coming home with me. And to say I'm sorry for barging in on you when I first got here. It's just… I really do miss you, Addie."

"Don't."

"And I still love you."

"Derek. Stop."

He didn't listen. "And because I love you, I will respect the fact that I've broken your trust, and I'll leave here and not bother you again."

Addison quickly wiped away the tears that were falling down her face.

"But there's one thing," he said.

"What?" she choked out.

"I can't leave without kissing you goodbye," Derek said quietly.

He closed the gap between them, placing a hand on her cheek and pulling her face to his. He gently kissed her, sucking on her bottom lip. A moment later, he slowly pulled away.

"I gotta go," he murmured.

- - - - - - - - - -

"They're gone." It was more of a statement than a question.

"Yeah," Teagan replied. "I just told them bye."

"Mmm."

"Are you sure you're okay to see patients today? I'm sure Naomi would understand if you took the day off."

"No," Addison said quickly. "I need to go to work today. I need to think about something else. Something that won't make me want to crawl in bed and never move."

"Okay," Teagan nodded.

An hour later, Addison walked off the elevator, through the lobby, and straight to Naomi's office, where she and Violet were already convened.

"Good morning," she greeted them, though not all that convincingly.

"Oh, really?" Violet asked cynically. "And what, might I ask, is so good about it?"

Naomi rolled her eyes. "You'll have to excuse her. She's full of bitterness and unrelenting rage today."

"Mark?" Addison asked.

Violet looked at her in surprise. "How did you…?"

"He's Mark," Addison said, as if that would be a sufficient explanation. They both looked at her, making it clear that they needed a little more information. "He's kind of a man-whore. I knew he wouldn't sleep with Naomi, so you were the next possible choice."

"Oh, well, thanks for the head's up," Violet scoffed. "He sleeps with me, then refuses to return any of my calls. And now, I hear he's gone back to Seattle. Without as much as a goodbye, I might add. Who does that?"

"Sorry," Addison mumbled, too tired to bother pointing out that Violet was a big girl and therefore responsible for keeping her own legs together.

"Okay, good start to the morning," Naomi quipped. "Now, Violet, out. I need to talk to Addison."

"Fine," she said, getting up and closing the door behind her.

Addison stared at Naomi. "What's up?"

"Well," she started, "remember when you started here, the contract you signed was just for 6 months."

Addison nodded, remembering this conversation from before.

"We do this for all of our employees. After 6 months, we evaluate their performance and decide whether or not to keep them on staff."

"What are you getting at, Nae?"

"Addison, you've been here for 6 months. Sam and I talked while you were back east." She paused and took a breath before continuing. "Your work is perfect, and all the patients love you."

Addison raised an eyebrow. "But…"

"But… there's something not… right."

"Are you saying you don't want me here anymore?"

"Addison, no. You know I love having you here. But I'm not convinced that _you're_ happy in this kind of environment. I think you miss the hospital and the surgeries and the cutting."

"I do, but—"

Naomi cut her off. "If this is where you really want to be, I will put a contract together, and we'll have it signed before you know it. I promise. But first… I want you to take some time for yourself. Decide if this is what you want."

"It is," Addison insisted.

Naomi held up a hand to stop her. "Take some time and think about it, and _then_ decide if this is really where you want to be. Okay?"

"Okay," she agreed.

- - - - - - - - - -

"So," Pete said, strolling into Addison's office later that day. "How was your Christmas?"

"It was alright," Addison replied vaguely. "Hey, listen… sorry I didn't call you when I got back. I was exhausted."

"You didn't call me until you were on the other side of the country, so I wasn't really expecting much," Pete said pointedly.

Addison sighed. "I know. And I'm sorry. Things were just a little hectic. That's all."

"Hmm… I don't think so."

"What are you talking about?"

"Derek," he said calmly.

"What? No. Derek has nothing to do with this. With us."

"Addison. There is no 'us,' as much as I wish there was."

"Pete…"

"Look. I'm giving you an out. Take it, okay?"

"Are you sure?" she questioned. "We can try this again. We…"

"I would take you up on that offer in a heartbeat if it weren't obvious to everyone except you that you're still in love with your ex-husband."

He walked out of her office and closed the door behind him, leaving Addison bewildered.

- - - - - - - - - -

"How was your day?" Teagan asked Addison when she got home that evening.

"Pete and I are done. And Naomi put me in a time out."

Teagan turned to look at her sister. "Excuse me?"

Addison sighed. "I am supposed to take some time and think about things."

"Like what?"

"Like if this is where I really want to be. As if I packed up my life and moved down here on a whim."

"Well, you kinda did…"

"Not the point."

"Well… _is_ this where you want to be?"

Addison considered it for a minute. "I don't know. I think so…" She paused for a moment, seemingly thinking about it. "So," she said, changing the subject, "you're really moving to Seattle?"

"Yeah."

"I really love having you here, sis. Even if I haven't always acted like it."

"I know," Teagan said. "It's just something I need to do."

Addison flopped down on her sister's bed and stared up at the ceiling.

"Why is Seattle so appealing to you people? I just don't get it."

Teagan smiled to herself. "I think you liked it more than you admit."

"Well, if you insist on going, I'm coming with you," Addison said. "At least to help you move."

Teagan looked surprised. "Really?"

"Of course. I mean, what are half-sisters for?" she smiled. "Besides, I have to make sure you're not living in some crap hole above a whore-house."

"Really? A whore-house? Is there an abundance of those in Seattle?"

"I just need to make sure my baby sister has a safe place to live."

Teagan smiled at her. "I can live with that."

"So… when do we leave?"

* * *

Alright. You know the deal. I write, you review. GO. 


	12. Fix You Up

Basically, they're in Seattle. And this makes me happy. I love Seattle.

And… it's my birthday.

READ.

* * *

_**Chapter 12  
**__**Fix You Up**_

"Last one," Addison said, dropping the heavy box on the living room floor. "I don't remember buying this much stuff."

"Me, either," Teagan said. "Now I have to figure out where to put everything."

Addison sat down on the floor and leaned against the wall. "That's all you, sister."

"Yeah," she said, sitting down next to her. "I can't believe we actually found a decent apartment this close to campus."

"You brought me for a reason," Addison pointed out.

"Yes. Your amazing apartment-finding skills."

"And my sparkling personality."

"That, too," Teagan laughed. "So…"

"So…?"

"Are you sure you don't want to call…"

"No. I'm _not_ calling him. For the sixth time."

"Why not?"

"There's no reason to. I came here to help you move and to maybe visit a few friends from the hospital. That's it. I've gotta get back home. I don't have time for Derek drama."

Teagan sighed, but didn't respond, instead choosing to stand up and start unpacking some of the boxes.

"I've got a few errands to run," Addison said. "I'll call you later, though, and we'll plan something for tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay," Teagan agreed. "Hey, Add?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks. For everything."

Addison smiled at her sister. "Anytime."

- - - - - - - - - -

"I got stuck in the pit today," Cristina whined as Meredith approached the desk where she was sitting.

"Then why are you sitting here?"

"I made my escape. Hey, switch with me."

"No."

Cristina feigned a look of insult. "I'd do it for you."

Meredith laughed. "Yeah. Right."

"I'll tell you what I know," she persisted.

"You don't know anything," Meredith scoffed.

"I do. And trust me… it's something _you_ _want_ to know."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "You just want out of the pit."

"True. But you _want_ to know this," Cristina insisted harder.

"Fine," Meredith grudgingly agreed. "What is it?"

"You'll never believe this," George said, suddenly appearing next to them with Izzie. "We just saw Dr. Montgomery up on three."

Meredith stared at them. "What?"

Cristina groaned. "Thanks a lot, Bambi. You just ruined my shot of getting out of the pit today."

"Are you serious?" Meredith asked them.

"Yeah," Izzie confirmed. "Looked like she was headed to the chief's office."

"Told you I knew something good," Cristina said smugly.

"Why is she here?" Meredith asked somewhat worriedly.

"Consult?" Izzie guessed.

"Yeah, it's probably just a consult, Mer," George reassured her.

"Maybe she's moving back."

They all stared at Cristina.

"What?" she asked innocently. "I'm just being realistic. It's no secret that the neonatal department has gone to hell since she left."

Before they could speculate further, all of their pagers all off.

"911 in the pit," George read from the small screen. "Let's go."

Derek walked around the corner where he had been standing as they hurried off.

- - - - - - - - - -

"Addison," Richard said in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

He stood up from his desk and walked around to hug her.

"Just visiting," she replied. "I'm helping my sister move, and I couldn't pass up the chance to come say hi."

"I'm glad you did. How is California?"

"It's great," she replied, less than enthusiastically. "Great."

Richard looked curiously at her but chose not to comment. "So, how long are you here for? I'm sure Adele would love to see you."

"I'll be around a couple more days. I'll give her a call later."

"She'll like that," he told her. "You know… if you wanted, we could make this a permanent visit…"

"Richard," she warned. "We've done this before. It didn't work out. I'm happy in L.A. My job is great, and the weather is even better."

"You are a _surgeon_, Addison. You belong in a hospital. _This_ hospital. You are wasting your talent at that private clinic."

"I've gotta get going," Addison sighed. She should have expected this.

"Look," he stopped her. "I want you back here. Your old job is waiting for you. Just… just please think about it."

She looked around his office, avoiding eye contact with him.

"Addison. Please."

"I'll _think_ about it," she finally replied, although she had no real intention to actually do so.

"Thank you," he said, relieved. "How about I take you out to dinner before you leave?"

"Sounds good," Addison said with a smile. "See you later, Richard."

- - - - - - - - - -

"So, the rumors are true."

Addison stopped and turned around to face Derek.

"Apparently so," she replied.

He crossed his arms across his chest and looked at her. "Here to help your sister?"

Addison shot him a curious look. "How did you…"

"Teagan mentioned something about while we were down there."

"Oh. Well, yeah… we got here a couple days ago and found her a pretty nice apartment two blocks from UW. She's unpacking as we speak."

"Good," Derek said. "So I uh… I found a box of your stuff last week. If you want it, you can come get it."

"Why can't you just bring it here, and I'll pick it up?" she asked.

"Look, do you want it or not?" he snapped. "Because if not, I'm just going to throw it out."

Addison sighed. "I'll be by later. What time do you get off?"

"Five."

"Fine. See you at six, then."

- - - - - - - - - -

Derek was sitting at the table in the trailer when he heard a car pull up a few minutes after 6:00. A few seconds later, Addison knocked on the door.

"Hi," she said as opened the door.

"Hey. Come in." He stood aside so she could and closed the door behind her.

"I like what you've done with the place," she joked.

"Funny. Want anything to drink?"

"No, thanks."

He filled a glass with water and handed it to her anyway.

"So how have you been?" he asked.

"Good. You?"

"Same."

"Good…"

"You know," Derek said, "I'm surprised you agreed to come back here."

"It was for Teagan."

"Are you sure that's all?"

"Yes. Why else would I be here?"

"I think you miss it."

Addison laughed. "Hardly."

Neither said anything for a few seconds, then Addison spoke. "Naomi made me take some time off."

Derek looked surprised. "Why?"

"She wants me to think about if L.A. is really where I want to be," she confessed. "She thinks I miss the fast pace of the hospital. And the surgeries. And the cutting."

"You don't?" he asked skeptically.

"I like the practice," Addison insisted. "It's just… different. Takes some getting used to."

"Yeah," Derek said. "I guess you're right."

"So, where's my stuff?" she asked, changing the subject.

"Oh, right," he said, standing up and moving to the small closet. "Here." He handed her a box.

She took the lid off to see what was inside. Besides her umbrella, there was a stack of pictures, a pair of shoes she had been looking all over for, a bottle of her favorite perfume, and a black velvet box. She pulled it out and opened it.

"I got that for you for our tenth anniversary," Derek said quietly.

"I remember," she replied, running her finger along the chain of the necklace. "I'm glad you didn't throw it out."

"I wasn't really going to," he admitted.

"Good."

She closed the box and put it back with the rest of her things. She noticed Derek watching her, and she looked up and met his eyes. They stared at each other for a few seconds before she stepped forward and pressed her lips to his.

He pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her as she slipped her tongue in his mouth. He began guiding her backwards to the bed, and she didn't resist. He slowly laid them both down. She ran her hands through his hair, and he slipped a hand under her shirt, running it over her sides and stomach. She moaned softly as he began to move toward the button on her jeans.

Without warning, she pulled away with a look of panic on her face.

"I'm sorry. I can't do this. Not again."

She pulled herself out from under him and hurried out of the bedroom.

"Addison, wait," Derek called.

"Derek, I… I can't. I have to go," she stuttered. She grabbed her purse and box from the kitchen and hurried out the door.

"Addison! Wait!" Derek yelled after her, pulling his shirt over his head and following her out. "Addison!"

She hurriedly descended the stairs, trying to get away as fast as humanly possible. In her hurry, she missed one of the stairs, catching the heel of her shoe on the edge, losing her balance, and falling to the ground, the contents of the box flying everywhere.

"Ouuuuuch!" she exclaimed.

"Are you okay?" Derek asked, rushing over to her. He knelt down beside her.

"No, I'm not okay!" she shrieked. She grabbed her ankle with a pained look on her face. "My ankle."

"Let me see," he said, trying to pry her hands off her ankle.

"No, don't touch it. It hurts."

"I need to see if it's broken, Addie," he reasoned. "Move your hands."

She reluctantly obliged.

"Well, I don't think it's broken. But you messed it up pretty good."

"Oh, is that your professional diagnosis, _doctor_?" she asked sarcastically.

"Yeah, it is," he snapped. "And now that you can't get away, you need to tell me what the hell just happened in there."

"God, Derek. It really hurts. Do we have to do this now?"

"Yes. What is wrong with you? You're running so hot and cold that I can't keep up. You tell me a few weeks ago you can't trust me, then you come here—"

"I didn't come for _you_," she said icily. "I'm here to help my sister _move_."

"Then you come _here_," he continued. "And _you_ kiss _me_, and then you try to run. You're really messing with my mind, you know that?"

"Okay, seriously, my ankle _really_ hurts. Please, just take me to the hospital."

"It's not broken. It can wait a few more minutes. Just tell me what the hell is going through your mind."

"All that's going through my mind right now is how much my _ankle hurts_!" she exclaimed. For the most part, she wasn't lying. Her ankle really did hurt. But more than that, she just didn't want to have this conversation.

"Addison. Do you or do you not want to be with me?"

"Derek. I swear to God if you don't take me to the hospital right now, I'm going to put the heel of my shoe into your thigh," she threatened, picking up the shoe that had come off her foot during the fall.

He looked her straight in the eye and saw that she was serious. "Fine. Let's go," he relented. "But don't think this is over."

- - - - - - - - - -

"Oh, my. What a surprise. The former Drs. Shepherd," Sydney Heron remarked as Derek and Addison made their way into the ER. "I never thought I'd live to see the day…"

"Addison hurt her ankle," Derek said before Sydney could speculate any further. "I don't think it's broken, but she wants Callie to take a look at it."

"Dr. Torres is in surgery right now," Sydney told Addison. "I'd be happy to take look at it for you, though."

Derek saw Addison's face turn to panic. "How long until she's out?"

"About an hour. Maybe longer. But we don't want you to have to wait that long…"

"I'll wait," Addison blurted.

Sydney looked puzzled. "Are you sure? I am fully qualified to have a look at it."

"I'm sure," she insisted.

"Okay. Well. Let's get you into a room, and I'll have to get a chart and some paperwork started for you and then we'll get going with some x-rays."

"Is that really necessary?" Addison asked. "It's just my ankle."

"Now, Dr. Montgomery," Sydney chided. "I'm sure you remember our protocol. Every patient must have a chart."

"Fine," Addison said through gritted teeth.

"Great. Okay," she looked at Derek. "Go ahead and take her to room 1145, and I'll be right there with the papers."

Derek nodded as Sydney hurried off, and he slowly proceeded to get Addison into the room she had specified.

"Why?" Addison asked, clearly annoyed.

"Why what?"

"_Why_ did _she_ have to be the only available doc in the ER?"

Derek sighed as he helped Addison up onto the exam table. "She's not _that_ bad, Addison."

"Not that bad? I'm sorry, have you _met_ Sydney before?"

"Addie…"

"Don't 'Addie' me. She talks to herself. Non-stop," Addison ranted. "She talks to the computer screen. She talks to the air. She talks to no one. At times, I used to think she may have been talking to me, but I was too afraid to acknowledge it for fear that she may never _stop talking_. And there I would be… captive to the endless, mindless chatter."

Derek glanced behind him. "Okay, she's coming back. _Don't_ say that kind of stuff in front of her. I'll be back to check on you soon."

"No, Derek. No. Don't leave me alone with her," she hissed.

He shrugged. "Should've just stayed and let me wrap your ankle."

"Alrighty," Sydney said, breezing through the door. "Let's get started on this, okay?"

Addison forced a smile. "Sounds good."

"I'll be back later," Derek told her, stepping out of the room. She glared at him.

- - - - - - - - - -

"I need your help."

"What's your damage, Shepherd?" Callie asked, unimpressed.

"Addison wants you to take a look at her ankle."

"Yeah, I know. They paged me half an hour ago."

"It's only sprained – albeit a pretty bad sprain – but I need you find a way to keep her around."

"For you?"

"No," he answered quickly. "Well. Yes. But don't make it seem that obvious."

"Don't make what seem obvious?" Mark asked curiously as he strode into the scrub room.

"Addison's here," Callie informed him. "And _your friend_ wants to be sure she stays here, at least for a couple days."

"Yeah, I heard. Sprained ankle. What's your plan?" he asked Derek.

"Oh, you're kidding me, right?" Callie said exasperatedly. "You want me to keep this woman, my _friend_, here against her will?"

"I haven't really come up with one…" Derek told Mark, ignoring Callie completely.

"She should stay with Callie," Mark said. "Callie lives close enough that Teagan can come visit and close enough that you can drop by after work."

"I'm not giving him a key to my apartment," Callie informed Mark.

"He can use mine."

Derek looked questioningly at Mark. "Why do you have a key to her apartment?"

"Don't question the plan," Mark said. "Okay, Cal, go have a look at her ankle and tell her she needs to stay off it for at least a few days."

"Whoa. Hold up. I'm gonna need at least one good reason why I should lie to Addison so that _he_ can spend more time with her."

"I love her, Callie," Derek pleaded. "Please?"

She looked skeptically at Mark. He shrugged and said, "He loves her."

Callie let out a frustrated groan. "I can't _believe_ I'm helping you do this."

- - - - - - - - - -

"Hey," Derek greeted Addison later, handing her a bottle of water. "Callie just got out of surgery, so she should be here in about 10 minutes."

"Thank God. I finally got Sydney to leave a few minutes ago."

Derek shook his head.

"I'm serious. I have never met someone who talks _so much_."

"I have," Derek muttered. "You know, I really don't think she's _that_ bad."

"That's because you have 'woo.'"

He looked confused. "I'm sorry… I have what?"

"'Woo,'" Addison repeated. "'Winning Others Over.' You are good at telling people to go to hell in a way that makes them look forward to the trip. She will happily leave you be. Because of the woo. I, on the other hand, usually cause people to cry when I say, 'Get out!'"

Derek rolled his eyes. "I think she gave you too many pain meds."

"Hey, Addison," Callie greeted as she walked through the door. "How's the ankle?"

"Feels a little better. It's starting to swell, though."

"That's to be expected," Callie told her.

"So how bad is it?"

"I took a peek at the x-rays that Sydney ordered, and luckily, you didn't break anything, but you tore up your ankle pretty bad."

"So… what? You wrap it and let me go, right?"

"Well, yes and no. I'll wrap it, but you're going to have to stay off of it for a few days. At least."

"Off of it? No, no. I need to be _on_ it. I have to get back to work."

Callie jotted a few notes in Addison's chart, preferring to avoid eye contact with her friend. "As your doctor, I strongly suggest that you call your office and request a few more days off. I'm sure they'll understand."

"But—" Addison began to protest.

"Naomi _wanted_ you to take time off," Derek pointed out.

"But where—"

"You can stay with me," Callie answered, flipping Addison's chart closed. "It'll be fun. Give us a chance to hang out and catch up."

Addison began to realize there was no way she was getting out of this.

"Alright. But I'm not playing Scrabble. Or watching the Home Shopping Network. Or whatever else people do when they're cooped up against their will."

"Good," Callie said with a smile. "I would _kill_ you at Scrabble, anyway."

* * *

She's stuck in Seattle. At least for a little while. evil laugh

The next update may not be very timely… I have three papers to write and three tests this upcoming week, so I will be wanting to curl up and die by the end of it.

Now review. Because it's my birthday, and I'm not above begging for reviews on my birthday.


	13. All I Want is You

Apparently I have to use my birthday to guilt you all into reviewing. Either way, thanks for all the reviews. I'm sorry it's taken so long for me to update. School hates me.

And for anyone wondering, YES, the name of this chapter is a song from _Juno_, a.k.a. the greatest movie ever. Well, that and _The__ Sound of Music._ It's kind of a tie.

* * *

_**Chapter 13  
**__**All I Want is You**_

To be completely honest, Derek had _planned_ on forgetting about Addison after returning from Los Angeles. It was a great plan. In theory. In actuality, it wasn't panning out so well.

In keeping with the plan, his first night back in Seattle was spent much like his very first night in the city – at Joe's. Trying not to think about her. Although this time, he paid no attention to the waifish blonde at the bar sending lust-filled looks his direction, much to her disappointment. He remembered how well that turned out last time.

After a few drinks, Derek had finally come to terms with the fact that he and Addison were over. Done. Kaput. She moved on, and he told himself that he could, too. Of course, now that the alcohol's affect had worn off, it wasn't quite as easy to believe.

But things could be worse, he reasoned with himself. At least now he had his best friend back to keep him company. And he had more friends in Seattle now than before.

Okay. Two. He had two friends in Seattle. Mark and Richard. And Richard barely counted as a friend. So really, he only had one.

But that wasn't the point. The point was that he didn't need Addison in his life. He would move on, find someone new, and spend the rest of his life with whoever that person turned out to be. He wasn't going to call Addison or write to Addison or even _think_ about Addison.

Except since that night, all he ever did was think about her.

But that would pass. Right? It had to.

It had been almost two weeks since he made the resolution to move on with life, to forget about her.

And then he had heard the interns talking.

Addison was back in Seattle.

That had to be a sign.

On some level, Derek had always believed in fate. It was more of a selective belief, really. He liked to think that fate was gracious enough to turn over the reins to him during his surgeries and that he was ultimately in control during those times. But in situations like this, he chose to believe that it was fate that had brought Addison back to Seattle. That maybe fate had bigger plans that he didn't know about. And that maybe separating him and Addison was fate's way of slapping him in the face with the truth – he didn't know how good he once had it.

That was why he had convinced Callie to lie to Addison. He had to find some way of convincing Addison that this wasn't a mistake and that she was here for a reason, not simply to help her sister move.

She was here because they were meant to be together. For better or for worse. That's what the vows had said. They had both believed those sacred words at some point in their lives, and Derek believed with all his heart that they were still true.

That's why he couldn't give up. Not just yet.

- - - - - - - - - -

"Alright, full house," Callie said, spreading her cards out on the table in front of Addison and Teagan.

"Damnit!" Addison exclaimed, throwing down her cards. "You _have _to be cheating."

"I don't think she is, Add," Teagan said.

"She's right. I'm not cheating," Callie insisted. "You're just really bad at this. Pay up."

Addison groaned. "I don't know why I let you talk me into staying here," she complained, reaching for the glass next to her and downing the rest of Callie's wine, then glaring at her. "You're taking my money and making me sit on my ass all day doing absolutely nothing."

"You're here because you enjoy the pleasure of my company, and you love me and miss me," Callie told her. "And by the way, you're not supposed to be drinking with those meds I gave you."

"Good thing I didn't take them, then, huh?" Addison said. "I think the swelling's going down. Right?" she asked, looking down at her ankle.

"No," Teagan said. "It looks just as big as it did yesterday."

Addison gave her a look. Clearly that was not the answer she wanted to hear. "_You_ are not licensed to practice medicine in this state," she said, disregarding Teagan's opinion.

"Neither are you," Callie pointed out. "But you _could_ be if…"

Addison rolled her eyes. "No. I'm staying where there is sun and sand and no ex-husbands lurking around corners. I'm happy there."

"The more you say things like that," Teagan said, "the less I believe you."

"Well, believe it, sister. I'm heading back in a few days, just as soon as _Dr. Torres_," she glared at Callie, "gives me the okay."

"If you say so," Teagan said, shaking her head. "Well, I should go." She stood up and reached for her coat. "First day of class tomorrow."

"Call me afterward and let me know how it goes," Addison told her.

"I will," she replied. "Have a good night. And watch her," Teagan said, pointing to Addison. "She'll try to walk on that ankle as soon as you turn your head."

Callie laughed softly as Teagan closed the door and began to gather up the cards that were thrown across the coffee table.

"So…" she said, trying to act nonchalant.

"What?" Addison asked.

"You're really going to leave me again?"

Addison smiled sadly. "I don't belong here, Callie, and you know it. There's nothing for me here."

"I'm here. Mark's here. Derek's here."

"Exactly. They're _both_ here. Big, life-size reminders of everything I've done wrong. Everything that was ever important to me that I screwed up. Do you know what it's like to live like that?"

"Addison. George and Izzie prance around that freakin' hospital day in and day out with total disregard to how that makes me feel. Don't tell me that I don't know what it's like. My situation may be a little different than yours, but seeing the two of them together never fails to remind me what a sham of a marriage I got myself into. So trust me… I can relate."

Addison sighed. "I'm sorry, Callie. I'm sorry I wasn't here for you when all this was happening."

"It's not about that, Addison. I'm fine. Not great, but I'm okay. I'm worried about _you_."

"Me? Why? I'm fine," she insisted.

"You're not happy," Callie said quietly.

"I'm happy."

"No, you're not. You _want_ to be, but you're not. You thought moving to California would solve all your problems and that you could start over. But Addison… you're not happy. I can see it in your eyes. You smile, but your eyes still look dull and lifeless." She paused. "Except for yesterday."

Addison looked curiously at her.

"When I was in the exam room with you and Derek… your eyes looked different. They're different when he's around."

"Callie…"

She held up a hand to stop her. "I'm not saying this lightly. Believe me. I was all against you leaving his sorry ass in a cloud of dust. But then… I don't know. Can you honestly tell me that you would be happy going back to L.A. and never seeing him again?"

"We're _divorced_, Callie. We don't have a relationship anymore. We're… nothing."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes. Really."

"Then tell me…" Callie said coyly, "If you two are 'nothing,' why are you still wearing that ring?"

- - - - - - - - - -

Callie turned her attention from her book when her bedroom door quietly inching its way open.

"Hey," he said quietly.

"Hey, you," she replied with a smile.

He closed the door behind him and took off his jacket, laying it on the chair in the corner.

"How was your night?" he asked her.

She watched him unbutton his shirt. "Tiring."

He smiled. "Yeah. They tend to do that to you."

"How was yours?" she asked him.

"Good. I think everything's all set up for tomorrow. He'll be over around 7:00, and _I_ am taking _you_ out for a fabulous dinner."

"And dancing?" she asked hopefully.

He laughed. "Don't push your luck."

He removed his shoes and jeans, sliding into bed next to her in his t-shirt and boxers. She tossed her book on the floor and settled back into his arms.

"So," she said, "do you think they're actually going to make it?"

He sighed. "I hope so. They kind of give me hope for myself."

"What are you talking about? They're both a mess."

"Yeah, true. But if they can make it, anyone can. At least that's what I like to think."

Callie was still skeptical. "After everything, you still think they're made for each other?"

"Yeah, I do. I don't know… I just can't picture Addison growing old with anyone except Derek," he explained. "Don't get me wrong; they yell and scream and hate each other most of the time they're together. But it's that part where they're _not_ yelling and screaming and hating each other where you can see that they're… perfect together. I just wish she could see it."

Callie smiled. "You're a good friend."

"I don't know about that," Mark laughed. "Maybe it's just the guilt talking. Maybe I'm just trying to fix what I helped break so I don't feel like such an asshole."

"No, I don't think so," she disagreed, pulling his arms tighter around her. "If that were the only reason, you wouldn't be here right now."

- - - - - - - - - -

Addison was startled out of her quite reverie by a sharp knock on the door the next evening. She debated about not answering seeing as how she was home alone and quite content with life at the moment, but in the end, her curiosity won out, and she hobbled over to open the door.

"Hey," Derek greeted from the other side.

Addison was confused. "What are you doing here?"

He held up a brown paper sack. "Brought you some ice cream."

She looked at him inquisitively. "Why?"

"Because you're hurt. And because I wanted to."

She smiled a little despite herself and slowly moved back to let him through the door.

"You home alone?" he asked, knowing perfectly well that she was.

"Yeah. Callie had a date tonight. Wouldn't tell me with _whom_, though."

Derek smiled to himself from the kitchen. "Bowls?"

"Cabinet next to the sink," she replied from the living room.

He scooped out two bowls of ice cream and walked to the living room, handing one to Addison and sitting down on the couch next to her.

"Thank you," she said a few minutes later.

"No problem. How's your ankle?"

"I think it's getting better. I still can't walk on it very well, but I'm not taking anything stronger than Advil."

Derek simply nodded and scooped another bite of ice cream into his mouth.

Addison was watching him carefully. "Don't think I'm not grateful, because I am, but what's this really about, Derek? Why are you here?"

"Do I really need to tell you again?" he asked.

She simply looked at him and raised an eyebrow.

He spelled it out, plain and simple, "I love you. I want to be with you. How many times do I have to tell you before you'll finally believe me?"

"I don't know _how_ to trust you anymore," she said sadly.

Neither of them knew what to say, so they sat together in silence finishing the last of the ice cream.

"Callie says my eyes light up when you're around," Addison blurted out.

"Okay…" Derek said, somewhat confused.

"After everything… after all I've done to you, and after all you've put me through… it's still you. All I want is to move on. To get on with my life. To be happy. I don't even remember what it feels like to be really, truly happy. That's all I want."

Derek looked her directly in the eye. "What about what I want?"

"You don't even _know_ what you want," she cried. "First it was me. Then it was Meredith. Now it's me again. What happens if you wake up tomorrow and want something else? What then?"

"I want _you_," he stressed. "That's it. That's all I've ever wanted, Addie."

"How do you expect me to believe that when your actions over the past few years say the complete opposite?"

"Mid-life crisis?" he attempted, half-joking.

"I'm serious, Derek."

"Look," he moved closer to her, taking her hands in his. "I know how hard it must be to believe anything I'm saying. But I swear on my life that everything I'm telling you is true. I don't know why it took losing you for me to realize how much I needed you. But you being here… maybe it's fate's way of saying that we should to give this another shot. That we owe it to ourselves to try again."

"I can't let you hurt me again. I _can't_," she whispered.

"Add, I can't promise that I'll never do something to hurt you again. I'm not perfect," he said honestly. "But I will _never_ do anything to you again like what I did before. I can promise you that."

He leaned forward slightly, never breaking eye contact with her. A few seconds later, she pulled him closer, pressing their lips together. She let go of his hands and wrapped her arms around his neck, running a hand through his hair.

He gently pushed her back so that she was now lying on the couch, him on top of her and their lips never breaking contact. She pulled away long enough to catch her breath before he pulled her back to him and slipped his tongue in her mouth, making her moan slightly. His hands found their way under her shirt, and he ran them up and down her sides and over her stomach.

"Derek…" she said breathlessly.

"Mmm," he moaned against her lips.

"Bedroom… now…" she managed to get out.

He quickly pulled himself off her, standing up and grabbing her hands to pull her to her feet.

"My ankle," she warned.

He smiled and bent down, placing his arms underneath her to pick her up.

He carried her into the room she was staying in and kicked the door shut behind them. Setting her down gently on the bed, he proceeded to pull his shirt over his head and then joined her.

In a matter of moments, their clothing was strewn about the room, and Derek was on top of her, kissing her passionately. She cried out softly as he slipped inside her, moving slowly at first and then increasing the pace as they both came.

He rolled onto his side and faced her, one arm draped across her hip. He smiled tiredly as he watched her breathing in and out, and he leaned over and placed a soft kiss on her lips. She smiled back at him, and he pulled her closer, snuggling her up against him as he fell asleep.

Addison lay wide awake, a thousand thoughts running rampant through her mind. She didn't mean for this to happen. Not again.

On the other hand… she couldn't deny how _right_ it seemed to feel Derek next to her and to have his arms around her again.

She sighed and shifted slightly so that she was now lying on her back, causing the hand that was draped across her hip to now rest on her stomach.

Looking down, a small glint of gold caught her eye.

Derek was still wearing his ring.

* * *

And there we have it. Another chapter. 

I'm not gonna lie – I'm not quite sure where I'm taking this story from here. They kind of seem to be doing whatever the hell they want, despite what I tell them, so...

I'll try to update as soon as possible, but seeing as how it's the end of the quarter, and my profs like to save _everything_ for the last 3 weeks, it could be a while. Again. Sorry!

Until then, review and give me your opinions, ideas, general wonderings… like when did Mark and Callie happen??

And also, why does Hillary Clinton have it in her mind that she looks good in that God-awful yellow suit she always wears?

Push the button.


	14. Situations

So. I wrote a lot of this last night when I couldn't sleep because I was stressing about my exams and papers. I read through it and tried to fix things that didn't make sense due to my sleep-deprived state, so hopefully it flows a little better than before.

Enjoy.

* * *

_**Chapter 14  
**__**Situations**_

"I've missed this," Addison admitted softly as she lay curled up next to Derek. They had the thick down comforter pulled over them, and he was running his hand absently through her hair as they watched an old black and white movie on TV.

"Me, too," he said and kissed the top of her head.

They hadn't left the room in two days. Derek had called in sick and stayed with Addison instead. Alternating between sex and sleep had left them very little time to actually discuss what all of this meant. And although he wanted to put it off a little longer, there was only so many days that Richard would believe he was sick. And he needed to talk to Addison without the threat of being interrupted by a pager.

"Hey, Add?" he asked tentatively.

"Yeah?"

"What are you thinking? About us?"

She sat up and turned to face him.

"I don't know," she admitted. "Long-distance relationships don't tend to work out very well."

"Do you _want_ to make it work?" he prodded.

"Of course I do. It's just… I don't know. I don't see how you living _here_ and me living _there_ is going to work. One of us is going to be flying back and forth once a week, and let's face it… it's going to end up being me most of the time because of your schedule. You're on call a lot, and you have crazy hours. And what if I fly all the way here and don't even get to see you because you get paged? I just… I don't see how this is going to work out."

"You could move back…" he suggested cautiously.

Addison sighed. "No. Not gonna happen. I can't."

"Why not?"

"I _just_ picked up my whole life and moved to L.A., and six months later, you expect me to do the same thing again? I have a job there, a life."

"You can have a job and a life _here_, Addison. Richard would give you your job back in a heartbeat."

"Why do I have to be the one who moves?" she asked. "Why don't _you_ move to California?"

Derek sighed. "Addison, please."

"So what you're saying is that you want to be with me… just not enough to move in order to do so?"

"Addison…" he reached for her hands.

She pulled them out of his grasp and crossed her arms over her chest, leaning back in the bed. "Don't 'Addison' me. It's a fair question, Derek."

"I know it is… but come on. Be honest with yourself. You miss being a surgeon. You never knew, but I watched a lot of your surgeries, and I saw how much you loved saving those little babies' lives. You don't get to do that down there. I know you miss it."

He was right. She did miss it. But that wasn't enough. "Derek… I don't think you understand everything I went through here before. I was the wicked witch of the east. They all hated me. I barely had respect as it was the first time. You think the second time around will be any better? If anything, it's going to be worse. It's going be things like, 'Oh, guess that Dr. Montgomery couldn't cut it in down in California. She must've come crawling back here with her tail between her legs begging for her job back.'"

He looked at her understandingly, putting his arm around her shoulder and pulling her close to him. "Do you really, truly want to make this work?" he asked her again.

"Yes."

He kissed her forehead. "Then we'll figure something out. Okay?"

"Promise?"

"Cross my heart."

"Good," she smiled and snuggled closer to him. "Because I kinda think I could get used to this."

- - - - - - - - - -

"What time is your appointment with Callie?" Derek called from the bedroom the next morning.

"Around 1:00. She has a 10:00 surgery scheduled, so she should be done about then," she said, emerging from the bathroom wrapped in a towel. "Why?"

Derek grinned at her. "I was thinking we could have lunch."

"At the hospital?"

"Yeah. Or wherever. I'm not picky as long as I get something edible." He looked at the anxious look on her face. "What's wrong?"

"You and me having lunch together? I don't really need to be the source of that damn gossip mill again."

Derek chuckled. "It's just lunch. It's not like I'm going to be feeling you up while you eat your salad."

"Derek…"

"Well, what if I promise to keep my hands to myself?"

"Fine," she relented. "But we're going to that little bistro down the street. It has better food anyway."

"Does that mean I don't have to keep my hands to myself then?" he joked.

She smiled. "No… you will be on your best behavior while we're out in public."

"Then I guess I better get this out of my system now."

He grabbed her by the waist and spun her around, laying her on the bed and climbing on top of her. She laughed as he kissed up and down her next and loosened the towel she had tied around her.

"Derek," she protested, albeit not too strongly. "I just took a shower."

"Guess you'll have to take another."

She smiled deliriously as his hands began to make all rational thought impossible. She placed her hands on either side of his face and pressed her lips to his, massaging her tongue against his. He continued with his hands while she pushed his boxers off his hips and let them fall to the floor. In just a few seconds, he had slid into her, and she moaned into his mouth. She wrapped her legs around his waist to pull him closer, and he began to thrust into her faster until neither one could take anymore.

He stared down into her eyes and kissed her softly. "I love you."

"I love you, too," she whispered quietly for the first time since their marriage.

Derek rolled off of her and stood up, grabbing her hand and pulling her along with him. "Come on," he grinned mischievously. "It's shower time."

- - - - - - - - - -

After having lunch, they had gone back to the hospital, and Addison was now waiting for Callie to finish up with her surgery. Callie had insisted that she come in to get her ankle checked once more, despite the fact that she could have easily checked it at home. Addison had a sneaking suspicion that Richard was trying to find any possible way to get her into the hospital in the hope of luring her back for good.

She sighed, annoyed, and threw down the magazine she had been glancing through. She rifled through the others on the table next to her, finally settling on a tabloid featuring a Britney Spears headline. At least that might provide some mild entertainment for the time being.

A few moments later, she heard a group of voices coming from around the corner. She looked up just in time to see Meredith Grey approaching with a group of doctors whom she didn't recognize.

Addison gave Meredith a tiny smile as they made eye contact, and Meredith forced a smile back.

"Go on down to the clinic," she told the others. "I'll be down in a minute."

She approached Addison as the other doctors vacated the area.

"Didn't expect to see you back here again, Dr. Montgomery."

Addison replied vaguely, "Just visiting."

"How's your ankle?" Meredith asked, remembering that she overhead people talking about it a few days ago.

"Getting better, thanks."

Meredith nodded. "Have you seen Derek around?"

"Not for a while," she replied.

"Oh." She tried to hide her disappointment.

"I'm sure you could page him if you need a consult, though."

"No, that's not it," Meredith said. "I just wanted to say hello. He's been busy a lot lately. Haven't really gotten much of a chance to talk. Especially with that long vacation he took."

"Oh," Addison said passively.

"Yeah… we're kind of going through a rough patch right now," Meredith said defensively, more to convince herself than Addison.

"So, you two are still…"

"Well, yeah," Meredith answered, apparently confused as to why Addison would think otherwise. "Things have been weird for a while… but I'm hoping that we'll be able to work things out. We always do."

Addison saw Callie rounding the corner out of the corner of her eye. Thankfully. "Well, good luck with that," she said. "I've gotta go."

- - - - - - - - - -

"So, Callie said your ankle is better? You can walk on it normally again?" Derek asked when Addison picked up him that evening.

Addison didn't look over at him. "Yep."

"Good. So how was the rest of your day?"

"Fine."

"Okay…" he said slowly. "What did you do?"

"Walked around."

"Oh..."

"Anything you wanna tell me?"

He thought about it for a moment. "No… I don't think so…"

"Okay," she said shortly and turned volume of the radio up. Derek reached over and turned it back down.

"Alright, what's got you all riled up?"

She stopped at a red light and looked over, glaring at him. "I had an interesting little chat with Meredith earlier. She seems to think that the two of you are just 'on a break' or whatever the hell people are calling it these days."

Derek looked perplexed. "'On a break?' I've barely spoken to her in over a month. Are you sure you understood her right?"

"Well, I believe the phrase she used was 'going through a rough patch,' but yeah, I think I managed to catch the general idea."

"Addison," he explained, "we _aren't_ together. I told you that at Christmas. You don't think I was lying to you?"

"No, I know you weren't. But Derek, I _told_ you. I told you I didn't want to be the other woman."

"You _aren't_ the _other_ woman. You're the _only _woman."

He wasn't getting it. "Derek. It doesn't matter if you know that and I know that. She still thinks you two are something. In her eyes, and everyone else's, I'm still the adulterous bitch, except now I'm the adulterous bitch who managed to lure you back with her siren-like ways. You need to talk to her and straighten things out."

"She'll figure it out," he said dismissively. "And it's not like we're making out all around the hospital. No one besides Callie even knows we're together."

"But they _will_," she pointed out. "I don't need people talking behind my back again. As much fun as that was the first time, I don't particularly care to re-live it," she said sarcastically as she parked the car, got out, and slammed the door shut.

"So what, then, Addison?" he asked, trying to keep up with her as she made her way to the door. "You don't want to be with me because of what _other people_ might think?"

"I never said I didn't want to be with you, Derek," Addison said exasperatedly as she unlocked the door to Callie's apartment and pushed it open. "I'm just saying that she clearly doesn't realize that the two of you are over. So maybe you should do something about that."

"Addison, I made it perfectly clear to her over a month ago that it wasn't going any further. And the only time I've talked to her since then was strictly at work. If she hasn't gotten the clue by now…"

She sighed heavily and threw her coat and purse onto the couch. "I refuse to be _that_ woman again, Derek."

"What woman?"

"The evil witch who swoops in and breaks up the sweethearts of Seattle Grace," she reminded him. "Callie!"

"That's not how it is, Add."

"Yeah, it is. Callie!" she called louder this time.

"Addison! Stop," he called after her as she headed down the hallway. "Let's just sit and figure this out."

"Callie, you here?" she called again, knocking quickly before pushing the door open to Callie's room. "Oh, my God!" she exclaimed as she saw Mark pull himself off of her friend, and they both attempted to quickly cover themselves with the sheets.

"Addison!" Callie yelled, clearly surprised and probably embarrassed. "What… uh… what are you… I thought you were—"

"Nothing. I'm sorry! We're leaving. Come on." She grabbed Derek's had and pulled him away from the scene in front of them.

They stood outside the door, clearly stunned, until they both started laughing at once.

"Did you know about _that_?" Derek finally managed to ask.

"No sweet clue. How long do you think that's been going on?" Addison questioned.

"I have _no_ idea… although… it does explain a lot."

Addison started laughing again, and Derek smiled as he watched her. He stepped closer to her and pulled her in close to himself and hugged her.

"How about," he said, "we pick up some extremely awful Chinese food from that place around the corner and take it back to my place for the night?"

She looked up at him. "But what about…"

"Not tonight," he insisted. "We can talk tomorrow. Let's just… be together tonight. No mention of Meredith or _that_" he emphasized, pointing to the closed door. "Just us."

"Okay," she agreed.

"Okay." He grabbed her hand as they left the apartment complex together.

* * *

Oh, avoidance. Great way to deal with things. Kind of like I'm doing right now with all my papers, tests, etc. 

Anyway. I'll try to get another chapter up after finals and before I leave for my spring break adventure. So review. I need inspiration.


	15. If I Fall You're Going Down With Me

Okay, so, I told you guys I'd get the next chapter out before I left for my trip, so here it is. And I don't know about you guys, but it seemed unusually annoying to upload the chapter this time. Like, the dashes I usually put between sections decided not to show up... so I had to go through and put X's, which will hopefully still be there when I post. Has it been doing weird things to anyone else?

In other news, I seem to have sprained my ankle the other day. Guess that's what I get for making Addison a temporary cripple. She's probably laughing at me, thinking, "My, my... isn't that ironic?" Yes, kind of. But unlike her, I didn't lose the ability to walk on mine. It's just really swollen and bruised. But the way I see it, I don't have a Derek to take care of me, so I think we're about even.

Anyway. Ready, set, read.

* * *

**_Chapter 15  
_****_If I Fall (You're Going Down With Me)_**

Teagan was sitting on the couch in her apartment late that night, attempting to concentrate on her paper that just so happened to be due the next morning. It wasn't going well.

She sighed and set her laptop aside, deciding that she needed a half-hour break to clear her mind. She turned the TV on and stretched out on the couch, her eyes slowly drifting shut.

She woke sometime later to a knock at her door. Momentarily disoriented, she walked slowly to the door and looked through the peephole. She gasped when she saw who was standing on the other side.

He knocked again.

She took a few deep breaths to compose herself before opening the door.

"Brian... what are you doing here?"

XXXXXXXXXX

Addison cuddled up next to Derek, laying her head on his chest and closing her eyes as she listened to his heartbeat.

"Add?"

"Mmm?" she murmured.

"Are you happy?" he asked quietly.

"Very," she said sleepily. "I'd be happier if we weren't in this _trailer_..."

He smiled and kissed her head as he pulled her closer.

"I have to go back in a few days," she whispered sadly.

Derek sighed. "I don't want you to leave."

"I know... but we'll see each other every couple of weeks... and we'll call and e-mail. We'll make it work."

"It would be easier if we were in the same _state_..."

"Derek," she said as she rolled her eyes. "Don't. We've had a good evening up 'til this point. Don't start, okay?"

"Okay," he reluctantly agreed. "But tomorrow..."

She reached up and kissed him hard on the lips. "Goodnight, Derek," she said before curling back up against him and drifting off to sleep.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Can I come in?" Brian asked her, shuffling nervously from one foot to the other.

"Yeah. Sure." She stood stepped away from the door far enough to let him in and closed it behind him.

Brian paced back and forth across the length of the living room before sitting down on the couch and staring at his feet.

"Brian," Teagan said sharply. "What do you want?"

He ran his hand through his short brown hair and looked up at her. "I, uh... I bought something for you." He pulled a small onesie out of the pocket of his jacket and laid it out on the coffee table. The front of it read "My Daddy Loves Me." It was the corniest, sweetest thing he'd ever done for her, and Teagan stared at it as he continued talking. "I was walking down the street a few weeks ago, and I don't know why, but I went into this store. And toward the back, there was this section of baby stuff. I just stood there, looking at all these teeny tiny clothes and wondering to myself how I could have been so afraid of something small enough to fit into those clothes."

She swiped at a tear running down her check as he continued. "I went to your apartment, but you weren't there. So I went to Katie's and finally got her to tell me where you were. She made me tell her why I wanted to see you... and when I told her, she told me what happened."

Teagan wasn't even bothering to hide the tears anymore.

"Teagan, I am so sorry for leaving you. I never should have done that. I should have taken the responsibility for the baby... and maybe... I'm so sorry. I didn't realize how much I wanted to be a dad until I walked in the store that day and saw all that stuff. I know I don't have a lot of money or a great job or anything... but I would have loved that kid with everything I have."

Teagan wiped the tears off her cheeks and fell into the chair behind her as he continued to talk. "I kinda think it would have been a little girl. With my nose and your hair and eyes. I like the name Lily. Or Jillian."

"Stop it," she blurted out. "Just.. stop it. You can't just come here and say these things. It hurts. It's just too much, and it hurts, and I can't... just stop!"

"Teagan..."

"No! Stop. You don't get to do this to me. _You left me! I told you I was pregnant, and you ABANDONED me_," she exclaimed. "So don't. Don't talk about her like you _knew_ her. Because you didn't. And her name was Julianne."

Teagan angrily wiped the remaining tears from her face as Brian sat on the couch, still shell-shocked and unsure what to say.

"I'm going to bed," she told him icily. "You can sleep on the couch, but you better be gone by the time I get up in the morning."

XXXXXXXXXX

"I need to talk to you," Callie hissed in Addison's ear the next day, grabbing her arm and pulling her into an empty room before she had a chance to react. She closed the door behind them and sat Addison down in a chair.

"I can't _wait_ to hear the rumors that come out of this," Addison said amusedly, knowing that at least one nurse had seen Callie drag her in there.

"Not the time," Callie said.

"Okay, fine. What's going on?"

"You can't say anything about Mark and me. Not to anyone."

"Callie," Addison smiled, "who am I going to tell? Besides Derek? And he already knows. We both saw you. _All_ of you."

"Addison, I'm being serious. I don't want people knowing that we're... whatever we are," Callie told her in a panicked voice. "As soon as someone knows, people will start talking, and Mark will get scared and do something stupid. I just want to keep this under the radar. I'm happy... with him, and I want to stay that way. Please."

Addison looked at her friend. "Okay. Okay, don't worry, Cal. I won't say anything."

"And Derek?"

"I'll tell him, too," she promised.

Callie sighed, relieved. "Thank you."

Addison smiled at her friend. "You look happy."

Callie smiled back at her. "I am."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Hey there," Derek said as he approached Addison from behind and kissed her quickly on the cheek.

"Hey," she replied with a smile.

"What are you doing here? I thought I was meeting you at Callie's later."

She shrugged. "Got bored. Callie and I were going to have lunch, but some kid decided to break his leg on a skateboard, so she's otherwise occupied for the time being. So... I've just been hanging out." She flashed him a smile. "I'm glad you're here, though."

"Really?" Derek said, raising an eyebrow suggestively.

She rolled her eyes. "Not like that. But come with me," she said as she headed down the hall, away from any eavesdropping nurses that may have been lurking around just waiting for the newest gossip. Derek followed behind her.

"Have you talked to Mark?" she asked.

"Not today. I actually haven't seen him since..."

"Got it," she nodded.

"Yeah. There's no need to re-live that."

"No, thank you. Anyway, Callie cornered me earlier and told me not to say anything about the two of them. She thinks it will scare him off. So..."

"So I shouldn't say anything, either."

Addison smiled and ruffled her hand in his hair. "You're so smart," she teased.

He leaned in and pecked her lips. "I know."

"So..."

"So... what do you think about dinner out tonight? Someplace really nice."

"I think I like the sound of that," she agreed.

"Good," he smiled. "Because I already made reservations. Be ready at 7:00."

"You got it." She squeezed his hand and then let it drop to his side. "So, what do you have the rest of the day?" she asked as they walked back out to the nurses' station that Addison had taken over previously.

"Should be a pretty calm afternoon. I've got a couple consults, one's been having headaches off and on for the past couple weeks, and..." he trailed off when he realized that she wasn't really paying attention. He followed her line of sight down the hallway. "Is that..."

"Violet?"

The curly-haired doctor turned around at the sound of her name, looking bewildered.

"Oh, Addison," she sounded relieved. "Good. You're here."

Addison watched as Violet approached her, looking very nervous and twitchy. "What's going on?" Addison asked her. "Why are you here? Is everything okay? Naomi? Sam?"

"Yeah, yeah, they're all fine," Violet told her with a wave of her hand. "It's just... uh..." she paced back and forth, taking very short steps. "Have you seen Mark around? I kinda need to talk to him..."

XXXXXXXXXX

"You're supposed to be gone," Teagan said, throwing a beaded decorative pillow at Brian's face that she knew wouldn't feel good as it hit him. He jumped up, startled, and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. "What are you still doing here?"

"I don't have anywhere else to go," he mumbled tiredly. "Ugh. Ouch," he complained, trying to pop his back in any sort of effort to make it stop hurting.

"That's not my problem," she said unsympathetically. "Maybe you should have anticipated that I might react this way before you flew across the country in a feeble attempt to make up for what you did."

"Teagan. I am _sorry_. I don't know what else to say. There's nothing I can really say to make up for what I did. I know that."

She filled the coffee pot with water, poured it in the brewer, and angrily flipped the switch on. "So go home, then, and let me be."

Brian sighed. "I have nothing to go home to."

"You don't have anything to stay here for, either," she said bluntly.

"Teag... please. Can I... can we... do you think that you could at least _try_ to forgive me?"

She crossed her arms and stared at him incredulously. "You're serious?"

"Yeah," he said earnestly. He looked so sad.

"If you want to stay in Seattle," she said, "that's fine with me. But if you're staying simply for me, you might want to think again. There's no guarantee that we're going to be together. So if that's your only reason for staying, I'd reconsider."

"Okay," he agreed.

"And you need to find your own place. You can sleep on the couch for a couple more days, but then you either get a hotel or a roomy cardboard box to call home. I don't really care either way."

Brian let out a relieved sigh. "Thank you."

"Don't think this means that I forgive you," Teagan told him. "I'm still really mad at you."

"As is your right."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Violet?" Addison said, trying to get the attention of her co-worker.

"She hasn't blinked for a good minute, at least," Derek observed.

"Violet!" Addison said, clapping her hands together sharply to get her attention. Violet snapped back to reality. "Hi."

"Hey, hi... Mark. I need to talk to Mark."

Addison looked concerned. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Fine. Great. Never been better," she rambled as she folded and unfolded her hands together nervously. "Except... I, uh... I think I might be pregnant..."

Addison looked at her in surprise and then to Derek, who looked equally as shocked. "Why don't you go get..."

"Yeah," Derek nodded. "Okay."

"Vi," Addison said gently, leading her over to a chair to sit down. "Have you taken a test yet?"

"No," Violet shook her head. "It's just... I'm late. I'm _never_ late. Ever. And kids... I don't even _like_ kids. How can I possibly be having a kid of my own? I can't do it. I'd screw it up far worse than any of the patients I've ever seen. It would be a disaster."

"Okay, okay," Addison said as she patted Violet's arm. "Let's take you to an exam room. Derek's getting Mark, and then we'll do a pregnancy test, okay? Things will be fine."

"Yeah, okay."

XXXXXXXXXX

An hour later, Addison had taken a blood sample from Violet, who had effectively sent Mark into a mild to moderate panic which Derek was currently attempting to control. The lab was backed up more than usual, so Violet's results wouldn't be available for a while, and Addison had been called to consult on a patient who had just been admitted and was pregnant with triplets. She had reassured Violet that everything was going to be fine and then went to meet the patient.

"Mrs. Thorne?" Addison announced herself.

"Please, it's Lauren," the woman insisted.

Addison nodded. "I'm Addison Montgomery. How are you feeling?"

"Large and whale-like," Lauren joked. "But aside from that, a little nervous about my babies. I mean, we've been trying for so long, and we didn't know if we'd ever have one, let alone _three_. So the pain I've been having really scares me."

"That's completely understandable," Addison reassured her. "But you are in good hands."

"Sorry, it's just... being in a new hospital. It's just different. We're used to going to Mercy West, but when we heard that someone of your credentials was here... well, we figured, why not give it a shot?" Lauren explained.

Addison looked at her curiously. "You heard I was here? Really?"

"Yeah... when I went in for my regular check-up at my OB's office last week. When I told her about the pain I'd been having, she told me about you and said that you were only in town for a bit and that I should probably try to get in to see you as soon as possible. So I called here, and your boss made me an appointment."

"My boss?" Addison asked.

Lauren nodded. "Dr. Webber, I think his name was." She looked at Addison, who now seemed a little irritated. "I'm sorry... is something wrong?"

"No, Lauren," Addison assured her. "I'm more than happy to do anything I can to help your babies. So I'm going to start with an ultrasound to see how they're doing and if I can see anything that might be wrong on there, okay?"

Lauren smiled warmly. "Okay. Thank you so much, Dr. Montgomery."

Addison nodded and plastered a reassuring smile on her face for Lauren while she prepared to do the ultrasound. Inside, however, she was pissed. She and Richard were going to have a little chat later.

XXXXXXXXXX

"What am I gonna do, man?" Mark asked Derek worriedly. The two men were in a break room around the corner from where Addison had taken Violet, and Mark had been pacing anxiously ever since Violet had told him that she might be carrying his child. "I can't have a kid. I'm not ready to be a father. I'm terrible with kids."

"Everything's going to be okay," Derek said calmly.

Mark looked at him incredulously. "How can you say that? You don't know. What if she's really pregnant? I'm happy with the way things are. And everything with Callie has been-oh, shit. Callie. I never even told her about Violet."

"Mark, buddy... you've got to calm down. Let's just wait and see what the test says. You might be freaking out over nothing."

Mark sighed loudly and plopped down in the chair across the table from Derek. "I know, I know. It's just... I've had a lot of one-night stands before. _A lot_. But this is different. Callie was just supposed to be another fling, but... she's not. I don't want to hurt her. And this thing with Violet... it'll hurt her. Especially if she's pregnant."

"Especially if _who_ is pregnant?" Callie's voice came from behind. Both men turned and looked at her, and Mark was at a loss for words. "Who, Mark?" she asked again, placing a hand on her hip and staring at him. "Did you cheat on me?"

"No!" Mark exclaimed. "No."

"Then what?" Callie stared him down, and although Derek felt sorry for his friend, he was more than happy that it wasn't him on the receiving end of her glare.

"It was just... a fling. A stupid, one-night thing. And now she's here... she doesn't know if she's pregnant or not. Addison's running the test."

"Addison knew about this?" Callie asked angrily.

Mark nodded slowly. "I met her while I was in LA. On Christmas."

"_Christmas_?" Callie asked angrily. "You mean, just a little over a week after you were with _me_? You slept with someone else?"

"We weren't together then, Callie," Mark argued defensively. "We didn't start anything until afterwards. I never would have been with her if we were together."

"Why should I believe that, Mark? You cheated on Addison when you were supposed to be with her."

"That was different," he exclaimed.

"How? _How was that different_?"

"I, uh... um..." Mark stammered, not finding anything remotely intelligent to say to that.

"I knew it. I _knew_ I shouldn't have gotten involved with you again. But I did, against my better judgment, and I really thought you'd changed. But a tiger never really changes his stripes, does he?" She shook her head and turned on her heel to leave.

Mark jumped up from his chair. "Callie, please."

"No!" she yelled as she whipped around to face him. "Leave me alone, Mark. Go deal with your pregnant girlfriend and _leave me alone_." She stormed off, leaving Mark standing in the hallway alone.

Derek slowly approached him a few seconds later, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry, man."

"Thanks for all your help," Mark said bitterly as walked off.

"Hey! Wait a minute," Derek called after him. "How is any of this _my _fault?"

"If you hadn't insisted on going on that damn trip to woo Addison, none of this would have happened."

"It's not my fault that you can't keep it in your pants," Derek told him angrily.

"Just leave me alone, Derek. At least for the rest of today," Mark said as he stormed off.

Derek threw him arms up in frustrated and walked off in the opposite direction.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Richard!" Addison exclaimed as she entered his office. "Just what the hell do you think you're doing having people referred to me? I don't even work here."

"Addison, please... have a seat," he requested. "Let's just discuss this..."

"I don't need to take a seat," she spat at him. "This won't take long. I just want to make one thing perfectly clear. I have a job, and I am going back to it whether you like it or not. I will see this consult through to the end, and that's it. I'm _not_ coming back to work here, so stop with the ploys to get me to do so."

Richard crossed his arms and looked at her. "You _belong_ _here_, Addison."

"That's not for you to decide." She stared at him for a moment for her point to set in and then left his office.

She headed down the hall toward the lab to pick up Violet's results.

"Addison," she heard Callie's voice call out from behind. She stopped and turned around to face her.

"Hey," she greeted her friend. "What's up?"

"You knew about Mark and this woman from LA, didn't you?"

"Callie..." Addison looked at her sympathetically.

"You knew, and you didn't tell me! I thought you were my friend, Addison. Perhaps this is something you might have thought about mentioning to me." She didn't give Addison a chance to respond before storming off down the hallway.

"Callie!" Addison called after her, but she didn't turn around. "Damnit."

* * *

Well. That was fun, eh? At least Addison and Derek seem to be pretty content with each other, even if everyone else is about ready to kill someone. That's a plus... right?

I'm leaving on Monday for a week, so it'll be a while until the next update. I'd say sorry for leaving the story hanging like this, but then I'd be lying. I kind of did this intentionally. But you all know deep down that happy is boring, so really, I've just created more fun. Just think of it that way.

Now... you review, and I'll be more inspired to write when I get back.

Push the button.


	16. Sitting, Waiting, Wishing

Alright, well, after getting like… 3 reviews last chapter, I wasn't all that motivated to write. So, I apologize to those of you who wanted an update quickly. And for those who didn't like the last chapter… well, I can't change anything if you don't tell me what it was you didn't like. I'm not promising that I will (because I kinda sorta have a plan going here)… but I think it's nice to offer.

That being said, I'm still not completely satisfied with this chapter… but whatever, I'm posting it anyway.

* * *

_**Chapter 16  
**__**Sitting, Waiting, Wishing**_

Addison rapped her knuckle on the door of Violet's exam room before turning the handle and letting herself in.

"Are those my test results?" Violet asked, pointing to the papers that Addison was carrying in her other hand.

"Yes."

Violet looked nervously around the room, folding and unfolding her hands. "Can I see them? Wait, no. You tell me. I can't look at them."

"You're not pregnant, Vi."

She let out a loud sigh of relief. "Oh, thank God."

Addison didn't say anything.

"I mean, could you imagine me with a kid?" Violet continued. "Naomi asked me to watch Maya once a few years ago, and I turned my back for one minute, and she'd practically destroyed the kitchen. Then I said 'shit,' and she wouldn't quit repeating it. Just think of what I'd do to something that was around me all the time."

Addison just nodded sadly.

"Oh, Addison, I'm sorry," Violet said, mentally kicking herself after remembering how badly Addison had wanted a baby. "I totally forgot."

"It's okay," she insisted. "Some things just aren't meant to be. No matter how much I want a little terror of my own around to destroy my kitchen."

Violet didn't know how to respond, so instead she quietly mumbled, "Thanks, Addison… for doing this for me."

Addison nodded. "You're welcome."

"When are you… I mean, are you staying…"

"No," she said quickly. "I'm discharging my only patient tomorrow, and I'm flying home in a couple days. I'll book you a ticket, and we'll go together. _After_ you tell Mark he's not going to be a father."

XXXXXXXXXX

Mark was writing notes in his patient's chart when Violet found him. She approached him slowly, afraid of how he would react to seeing her after the mild panic he went into the last time.

"Hey," she greeted him tentatively.

He turned around and looked at her expectantly, though not able to find the words he was looking for to find out if his life had suddenly been changed forever.

She saved him the trouble.

"I'm not pregnant, Mark."

He let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding, grateful to hear those words come out of her mouth.

"I'm sorry for scaring you," she told him.

"Yeah," he said, now more annoyed and angry than relieved. "You know, you really should have just found out whether or not you were before coming all the way up here."

"I know," she conceded. "But I was scared and didn't know what to do. I panicked."

"Well, your panicking may have cost me the best relationship – hell, the only _real_ relationship – I've never been in," he said angrily.

"I'm sorry, Mark. I'll talk to her if you want – tell her I'm not looking for anything from you and that we were just a stupid mistake."

"You really think that will help?" he growled. "You think that's going to make her less angry at me for sleeping with you? Just go home, Violet."

She crossed her arms over her chest and nodded. "Yeah, okay. Bye, Mark. And for what it's worth, I really am sorry."

With that, she walked away. He watched her go as he ran a hand through his hair, wondering how on earth he was going to make this up to Callie.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Martini. Dry," Violet said as she sat down at the bar. Joe looked at her a nodded, turning to make her drink.

She propped her elbow up on the bar, resting her head in the palm of her hand. She was trying to figure out what in the world she had been thinking when she hurriedly wrote Naomi a note saying that she was going to see Addison and would be back in a few days before hopping on the plane. Why she wasn't able to calm herself down enough to realize that springing the news on Mark that she _might_ be pregnant was probably not one of the better ideas she'd ever had was beyond her. How was it that she was able to rationalize her patients' life but never her own? She still had yet to figure that one out.

"Martini dry," Joe said, sliding her drink across the bar. She smiled and nodded in thanks and took a sip, knowing that soon enough, things wouldn't seem quite as bad as they did now.

Out of the corner of her eye, she watched as a younger man took a seat on the barstool next to her. She hoped he would just keep to himself. She was not in the mood to make small-talk with anyone right now.

"You new here?"

No such luck.

Violet turned toward the man and nodded quickly. "Just visiting."

"Oh, yeah? Where you from?"

"California." She hoped the one-word answers would make him realize that she wasn't interested and stop talking.

It worked for a while, and she was able to finish her drink in relative peace and quiet. But as soon as she set her empty glass down, he started talking again.

"Can I get you another?"

She looked him up and down. He was definitely a lot cuter with a little alcohol in her system. And she was never one to turn down a free drink.

"Sure," she replied with a smile. "Why not?"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Derek, I'm not having this fight with you again," Addison said, exasperated, as she pushed open the door to Joe's. "Not here."

Derek followed closely behind her as she made her way to a booth in the back. "You just booked a plane ticket back to LA. You're leaving in two days. When _are_ we going to have this conversation?"

"Later," she insisted. "Right now I just want to have a drink. It's been a long day, what with Violet appearing like a pop-up book from hell, and now Callie's mad at Mark _and_ me, and she refuses to speak to me. I just want to have a drink in peace. Then we can fight. Okay?"

"Fine," he conceded. "I'll go get our drinks. And while I'm gone," he reached into his briefcase, "here's some reading material for you."

She took the book he held out to her. "Real estate? Derek! I already told you, no, I'm not moving here."

"Just have a look at it," he said before turning and headed toward the bar.

She sighed a flipped the book open to amuse him. She glanced at the first page and raised an eyebrow as she started flipping quickly through the remaining pages. Derek returned a moment later with their drinks.

"What's this?" Addison asked impatiently, pointing at a house on one of the pages circled in red. Just one of many throughout the book.

"That one's my favorite. Looks like a nice place, don't you think?"

"Uh, yeah… sure. Not sure what you're going to do with such a big house, though."

Derek smiled. "It would be for _us_, Addie. For you and me and hopefully a couple little rug rats in a few years," he said as he took the book from her and pointed at a second picture on the page. "See, look. It's got a huge backyard. We could put in a pool and build a tree house for the kids and…"

"Stop."

He looked confused. "Why? What's wrong?"

"This," she exclaimed, moving her finger back and forth between the book and him. "All of this. Derek, you don't get it? None of this is ever going to happen. I live in LA now, and you live here. We _just_ got back together, and you're already planning out this future for us. We don't even know what we're going to be like a year from now. We might hate each other again by that time, Derek. It happened before. What's to say it won't happen again?"

He reached out and grabbed her hand and squeezed it. "I've never hated you. I could _never_ hate you, Addie."

She sighed exasperatedly. "It's more than that… I can't have children, Derek," she told him slowly. "That's why I went to see Naomi in the first place. I wanted a baby. And I can't have one. I can't give you that." She paused for a moment. "You still see that future now?"

"Addison…"

"Look," she cut him off. "It's going to be hard enough to do the long distance thing as it is without you planning out a skewed version of the rest of our lives."

"Add, there _are_ other options, you know."

"I know," she snapped.

"Then what's the problem?" he shot back. "Why are you so against this? I thought you _wanted_ all of this."

"I did. I _do_," she clarified. "But I've got my hopes up enough times in my life to know that most of the time, that's all they are – hopes. I'm tired of planning and being disappointed. I just… I don't want to do it anymore."

Derek wouldn't let it drop. "Why are you being so negative about this? We're back together, after everything we've been through, and that's kind of a miracle, if you ask me. Why can't you just have a little faith?"

"Derek, please. I have to leave the day after tomorrow, and that's going to be hard enough, and this isn't making it any easier. Okay? I just want to have a drink and then spend as much time with you as we can before I go back home."

Derek nodded unwillingly and gave her hand a reassuring squeeze, forcing a smile for her benefit. He'd let it go. At least for right now.

She forced a smile back and began to stand up. "Be right back," she promised.

Addison headed back toward the ladies' room, running a hand through her hair as she walked quickly, her heels clicking on the floor. She needed a moment, needed to clear her head. She almost wished she was back in California already. The longer she stayed around Derek, the harder it was getting to be to leave him again. And now, knowing that he still wanted the two-story house, white picket fence, and the 2.5 kids she was unable to give him, she felt even worse. Why did he have to bring this up now? Or at all?

As she pushed the door of the restroom open, she could hear muffled noises coming from the end stall. Male and female. Grunting and moaning.

Well. That definitely cleared her head.

She spun quickly on her heel and went back out the door faster than she came in.

Derek looked up as she re-approached. "That was fast."

"There are two people going at it in there."

He raised an eyebrow, intrigued. "Really? Who?"

"How should I know?"

Derek shrugged and then slid around so he was sitting on the same side of the booth as her.

"What're you doing?" Addison asked.

"Waiting 'til they come out," he replied, as if she should have already know the answer.

"Are you serious? What are you? Twelve?"

Derek just grinned at her and took a drink of his scotch. Addison took the opportunity to snuggle up against him, and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer and kissing her lightly on the top of her head.

"I'm really going to miss you," she said quietly.

"Me, too," he agreed. They sat like this for a few minutes, both just enjoying being close to each other, until Derek quickly sat straight up. "Ooh, the door's opening."

They both turned their eyes toward the restroom door as Alex Karev poked his head out not-so-inconspicuously and then strolled past the bar with a smug look on his face.

Addison rolled her eyes. "That should've been obvious."

"Wanna take bets on who the girl is?"

"Derek!" Addison scolded and then reconsidered. "Ten says it's Stevens."

Derek scoffed. "Twenty on Callie."

"You're on."

They waited a minute or two until they saw the door slowly opening again. And out stepped Violet, straightening her shirt and trying to smooth down her unruly curls.

"You have _got_ to be kidding," Addison said, "What is it with Seattle? Huh? Is there something in the air here that makes women sleep with inappropriate men? I just don't get it."

She watched as Violet skirted nervously around the bar past Alex, who was now sitting there with a smug look plastered on his face, and then slipped out the door, managing to bump into only three people during her graceful exit.

Addison shook her head and finished off her drink.

"Well. She'll be regretting _that_ in the morning."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Hello?" Addison asked hurriedly as she flipped her phone open the next morning.

"I believe you have something that belongs to me," came Naomi's voice from the other end.

"Yeah, and you can have her back. She's managed to do more damage in her first 24 hours here than I did. And that's saying something."

"I don't even want to know," Naomi said. "Just tell her to get back here."

"I can do you one better than that. I'll bring her myself."

"Oh," Naomi said, puzzled. "You're coming back?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, you still want me there, don't you?"

"Of course… I just thought that you'd be staying there now that you and Derek are back together."

Addison sighed. "I'm not moving back here, Nae. I'm flying out with Violet tomorrow, and we'll be to work the next morning. I will see you then." She snapped her phone shut. She really wished everyone would just give up on the fact that she wasn't moving back to Seattle.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Hey," Addison said quietly as she carefully approached Callie. "I brought you coffee."

Callie glanced over at the cup that Addison slid her direction and then turned away, uninterested.

"Callie, come on. I brought you a delicious, steaming hot cup of peace offering. Please talk to me. I'm leaving in the morning, and I can't have you mad at me."

She pointedly ignored her and continued to scribble notes in the chart.

"Okay, fine. You don't have to talk. But at least listen to me. I just wanted to say thanks for letting me stay with you and that I'm sorry for upsetting you. I'm really going to miss you… and I hope you can find 

a way to work things out with Mark. For what it's worth… he's a better guy now, and I think a lot of that has to do with you. And he's really upset thinking that he lost you. So… that's it. I guess I'm gonna—"

Addison stopped short as Callie abruptly wrapped her arms around her.

"You're really leaving me again?"

"Yeah," Addison said sadly. "But I'll be back."

"And under Derek the whole time you're here."

"Not the _whole_ time," Addison smirked. "Sometimes on top."

"Very funny," Callie said.

Addison smiled. "I'll see you. I promise."

"You better."

"So… we're good?"

"We're good," Callie affirmed.

"And you'll talk to Mark? At least hear him out."

"Don't push your luck."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Guess what I just did," Derek said, enthusiastically grinning as he approached Addison.

She narrowed her eyes and looked at him suspiciously. "What?"

"I called a real estate agent about that house I showed you the other night."

"You did what?"

He didn't seem to hear her. "It's a really great place, Addie. Beautiful yard, nice neighborhood, good schools. It took some convincing, but I talked her down on the price. And she said we can go look at it later, if we want."

"Derek! What is wrong with you? Did you not hear a word I said last night? I'm _not _going to look at that house because I'm _not_ moving here. What's it going to take to _get that through your head_?!"

"Well, forgive me if _I'm_ not as quick as you are to give up on us being together."

Addison threw her hands up in frustration. "I'm _not_ giving up on us, Derek! I'm just being realistic about it. _You_ are planning out our _entire life_ when we've only been back together for _a week_."

"Because I know what it's like to live without you! And I realized I don't want to do it anymore. I love you!" he practically screamed.

Addison looked around the now-crowded hallway of the hospital. "I'm not doing this here. I'm going back to Callie's," she said calmly before reaching for her purse and walking determinedly toward the doors.

Derek hung his head and ran a hand through hair. That could have gone better. He sighed and then looked up at the people watching him. Seeing the look on his face, they all scurried away and went back to their business.

He angrily threw open his patient's chart and began scribbling notes in it, trying to ignore the whispering around him.

"Hey," Meredith said, walking up to Cristina who had been a witness to the yelling match. "What's going on?"

"The former Drs. Shepherd just put on a show for the hospital," she stated. "It was one of their better ones, I think."

"She's still here?"

"Apparently," Cristiana said, providing as few details as possible hoping that Meredith would change the subject.

"I think I should go talk to him," Meredith said unsurely. "He's probably pretty stressed out with her being here. It's what a good girlfriend would do. Right?"

"I don't think that's such a good idea," she told her, trying to spare her friend's feelings because she was pretty sure Meredith had no sweet clue that there was something going on between Addison and Derek again.

"I'm just going to see how he's doing," Meredith insisted. "No harm in that."

Cristina rolled her eyes as Meredith strolled over to Derek. "Your funeral," she muttered, taking a seat in a nearby chair to watch the show.

"Hey, there," Meredith greeted him.

He barely glanced up from his chart. "Oh. Hi."

"How, um… how are you?"

"Fine," he said sharply.

"Okay… it's just… I wanted to say hi. That's all. You seemed a little stressed out with Addison being in town still, so…"

"Don't talk to me about Addison," Derek shot at her.

Meredith looked taken aback and didn't know what to say.

"Look, I've got a patient," he said impatiently. "I'll see you later."

With that, he stormed off down the hall, leaving behind an amused Cristina and a very confused Meredith.

XXXXXXXXXX

After going to Callie's apartment after work and doing a little groveling, Derek managed to get Addison to spend the rest of the evening with him, trying his hardest not to upset her again before she had to leave. As much as he wanted her to stay, he didn't want her going back to LA mad at him.

They had picked up Violet at her hotel this morning, and Derek drove them both to the airport. Addison hadn't said much that morning, and Derek knew she was trying her hardest not to cry until she was out of his sight.

The three of them were at Sea-Tac Airport, and Addison and Violet had checked their luggage and were now headed for the security check point. Derek and Addison were trailing slowly behind, hand in hand, hoping that walking slower would delay their separation.

They stopped as they reached security, neither knowing what to say. Violet looked between the two of them, sensing they needed some time.

"I'll just see you at the gate," she told Addison as she headed toward security.

Addison nodded and turned toward Derek, who immediately enveloped her in his arms.

"Call me when you get there?" he asked quietly.

"Yeah, I will," she promised. "I love you. You know that, right?"

He placed a kiss on her head. "Yeah, I do."

Addison rested her head on his shoulder as he gently rubbed his hand up and down her back. After a while, he pulled back slightly, looking her in the eyes.

"You better go," Derek said sadly.

Addison placed a hand on the back of his neck and pulled his lips to hers, kissing him deeply. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her closer to him.

"Okay," she whispered, pulling away slowly. "See you in a couple weeks."

"I love you," he said, kissing her gently again.

"I love you, too."

She reluctantly pulled away and walked toward security, handed the attendant her ticket and ID, and turned around, waving at him and forcing a smile before walking through the checkpoint.

She found her way to her gate and took the seat next to Violet. She set her bag on the ground before turning her head and looking out the window.

"You okay?" Violet asked gently.

Addison turned to her with tears in her eyes. "No," she admitted.

Violet reached over and gave Addison's hand a supportive squeeze as the tears started flowing silently down her cheeks.

* * *

Alright. You all know that I'm a review whore. So review.

Do it now.


	17. Desperately

Okay, so this chapter covers a span of… weeks. You'll see. I feel like you may not like me afterwards. I dunno. We'll find out.

Thanks to Kendel for some of the wittier lines.

Okay, read.

* * *

_**Chapter 17  
**__**Desperately**_

"Hello?"

"_I miss you."_

She smiled sadly. "I miss you, too."

"_I cleared my schedule for the weekend."_

"When do you get here?"

"_Friday afternoon."_

"I'll block out my afternoon, then. Call me when you land."

"_I will. I love you_."

"Love you, too. See you in a couple days."

XXXXXXXXXX

Addison threw her head back onto the pillow as Derek kissed and sucked on her neck, running his hands over her body.

She shifted, aligning her hips to his, and he thrust into her. She moaned and moved her hands to his face, pulling it to hers and crashing her lips onto his. He kissed her gently, and she lifted her hips slightly off the bed to meet his thrusts.

He moved a hand in between her legs, causing her to let out a deep moan and toss her head back again. Derek kissed down her neck and across her collarbone before burying his face in her neck as she began to come. He thrust into her hard one last time before reaching his own climax.

He lay on top of her afterwards, both of them still breathing hard. She opened her eyes and met his gaze. She lifted her head slightly and gently met his lips, kissing him softly before rolling them over so she was now lying on top of him.

Addison rested her head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat, and Derek ran one hand absently through her long auburn locks while the other gently rubbed circles on her back.

"I don't want you to go," she murmured.

"I know," he nodded. "Me, either."

XXXXXXXXXX

"What do you want?" Teagan asked annoyed as she put her phone up to her ear.

"_Just saying hi," _Brain replied nonchalantly.

"Oh. Well… hi, then."

"_What are you doing right now?"_

"Still trying to study," she said exasperatedly.

"_Sounds like you need a study break."_

Teagan rolled her eyes. "I don't need a study break. What I need is for you to stop calling me. This is the third time today."

"_No. You need a study break. You're stressed. I can tell."_

"Fine. I'll take a study break if you promise not to call me again until _after_ my test."

"_I knew you would agree."_

Teagan suddenly heard a knock at her door.

"Where are you?" she asked suspiciously, walking over to answer. She swung the door open to see Brian standing on the other side, smiling at his "cleverness."

"Hi," he grinned.

She snapped her phone shut and put a hand on her hip, eyeing him in half-curiosity and half-annoyance.

"I brought you food," he said, holding up a small cooler. "You hungry?"

"No," she lied.

"Well," he said, "you promised to take a break. And you need to eat sometime. So…"

"What's in there?" she asked.

He smiled, knowing she wouldn't turn down food. "Your favorite."

She considered it for a moment before standing aside. "Fine. Come in."

XXXXXXXXXX

"_Derek Shepherd."_

"Hey, it's me. You busy?"

_He smiled. "I've got a minute."_

"How's your day going?"

"_Oh, you know… the usual. Brains to be fixed, lives to be saved…"_

She giggled. "You make yourself sound pretty important, there, doctor."

"_Well, you know…"_

"So, there's a couple flights leaving here on Friday. What time would be best for you to pick me up?"

"_Uh… whenever, I guess. I should have the entire afternoon off."_

"Okay, I'll book a flight, then."

"_See you on Friday."_

XXXXXXXXXX

Addison was pissed.

A mere two hours after arriving in Seattle, Derek's pager went off. He promised it wouldn't take more than an hour.

That was four hours ago.

And now she was stuck out in the backwoods, alone, with no form of transportation. She was mad and frustrated, and the cable was out.

So she cleaned. She cleaned the kitchen, the bedroom, the living room, even the tiny little trailer bathroom. Anything to channel her anger somewhere in the small hope of controlling it when Derek finally walked through the door.

Was it really that hard to call? After all, she had just flown here to be with him, and he wasn't even here. The least he could do was call, right?

She flung herself onto the bed and stared up at the ceiling. _This_ was precisely the reason she had been so hesitant of this whole situation in the beginning.

She sat up when she heard the door open.

"I am _so_ sorry, Addie."

"_Where_ have you been?" she practically yelled.

"This guy came in. He hit his head and just wanted to get it checked out. Turned out he had an aneurism that was about to burst."

"You couldn't give it to anyone else? You're not the only neurosurgeon there, you know."

"I know that!" he replied, getting angry at the fact that she was upset with him. "Dr. Buxton is on vacation. What was I supposed to do? Let the guy die?"

"A phone call, Derek," she stated. "That's all I'm asking for."

"I'm sorry, okay? What else do you want me to say?"

Addison threw her hands in the air and sat down on the edge of the bed. "I don't know," she admitted.

"Don't you think I would rather be here with you?"

"That's what I hoped," she said. "But this is how it was before, Derek."

"No, it's not," he said, walking closer to her and taking her hands. "I _didn't want _to be there this time. I wanted to be here with _you_. So no, it's not the same."

He leaned down and captured her lips with his, slipping his tongue into her mouth. She ran her hands slowly through his hair as he pushed her backwards onto the bed.

"Believe me yet?" he asked.

"I don't know," she smirked. "I think I'm going to need a little more convincing."

XXXXXXXXXX

"This is Addison Montgomery," she said hurriedly into the phone.

"_This is Derek Shepherd," _he mocked.

"Funny," she said. "What's up?"

"_How's your day been?"_

She sighed. "Boring. I've only seen four patients, and Violet is out sick today, so the entertainment factor here has been significantly lowered. I've resorted to counting the number of times that the man-child has come up with a reason to talk to Naomi. Poor fool. Wonder what he's going to do when he finds out she's back with Sam."

"_Wait, they're back together?"_

"More or less," she shrugged, picking up a pen and doodling on the calendar on her desk while she talked. "They're still living apart and denying the fact that they're sleeping together. But I live next door to Sam. I know otherwise." Derek laughed as she continued. "And Cooper's been acting like a love-sick teenager. I'm this close to locking him and Violet in a room together so he'll just do her and get it over with. Anyway. What are you up to?"

He didn't answer right away, and she could hear him mumbling to someone else on the other end.

"Derek?"

"_What? Yeah. Sorry, did you say something?"_

"I asked what you were doing."

"_Yeah, I'll be right there," _he said to someone else._ "Hey, Add, I've gotta go. I have a consult. I'll call you later?"_

"Yeah, okay," she sighed, annoyed that his attention was elsewhere. "Love you."

"_You, too. Bye."_

She set the receiver down and laid her head on her desk, trying not to let it bother her. She knew he was busy. And she was proud of the fact that he was such a good doctor and that his work was a priority. But that didn't stop that nagging feeling in her gut that things were falling back into an eerily familiar pattern.

XXXXXXXXXX

"'Morning, Addison," Cooper greeted as she stepped off the elevator.

She mumbled something in response and trudged back to her office, slamming the door behind her.

Cooper looked at Violet and Naomi. "What was that all about?"

Violet just shrugged, and Naomi sighed. "It's Friday."

Cooper was confused. "… And?"

"And Derek cancelled on her this weekend."

"Oh."

Violet looked at Naomi, who nodded, and the two of them headed back to Addison's office. Naomi knocked quickly on the door before pushing it open.

"Hey," she said sympathetically. "You okay?"

"I'm fine," she lied. "I don't need your pity."

Addison stood from her desk and strolled past them into the kitchen. Pete and Cooper turned their heads as she blew past them, heading straight to the refrigerator and pulling out the pitcher of water.

"Addison," Violet said. "It's perfectly normal for a woman to feel frustrated in your situation. You know… there are… _ways_… to get this frustration out."

She slammed her glass down on the counter, turned her head sharply, and glared at Violet. "Like scratching the itch with inappropriately young strangers I pick up in a bar? And take as far as the restroom," she scoffed. "I don't think so."

Naomi raised an eyebrow and smirked at Violet, whose face was almost as red as Addison's hair. Cooper looked like someone had just kicked his puppy, and Pete's expression was unreadable.

"Was Violet a naughty girl in Seattle?" Pete asked, clearly amused.

"I don't wanna talk about it," she said quickly, turning her face from the group. "Anyway, this isn't about me. We're talking about Addison's problems."

"My problems. My problems have been your conquests lately. I'm making you a list. Every time you meet a man, I want you to see if his name is on the list. If it is, walk away. Just walk away."

"Why?"

"Because I've already been there, and this is getting weird for me," she took a sip of water. "Two in a row, Violet. Two in a row."

Violet grimaced.

"Look, I'm fine," she insisted again. "I would be _better_ if I had gotten laid this weekend, but hey, we can't get everything we want."

The men were caught between feeling amused and starting to feel uncomfortable being caught up in this conversation. Although they weren't yet uncomfortable enough to slip quietly from the room.

"I'm sure he's really sorry he couldn't make it, Addie," Naomi tried to reason with her. "He would be here if he could."

Addison scoffed. "Easy for you to say. Your ex-husband is always around whenever you feel the urge to jump him. I swear… I'm going to have to start finding other things to hump if this keeps up."

Sam strolled into the kitchen as everyone else was laughing at Addison's misery and was met with the curious eyes of Pete and Cooper.

"What's going on?" he whispered to them.

"Addison's frustrated. Sexually," Cooper explained. Sam cringed. "And apparently Naomi has ample opportunity to jump you at any given time. Who knew?"

"What?" Sam exclaimed.

"Shhh," Pete shushed them. "Just watch and listen. It's getting better by the minute."

They stood back as Addison paced around the kitchen, opening and closing the cupboards, clearly unsure what she was looking for.

"Hey, Addie… why don't we have a girls' night?" Naomi suggested. "We'll get some sappy chick flicks and ice cream. The good kind. Lots of fat. Take your mind off Derek."

"Argh," Addison moaned, flinging herself onto the island in the middle of the kitchen. "You're right. I just need to think of something else."

"Good girl," Naomi said.

"You know…" Addison said thoughtfully, her face buried against the counter, "this position... not bad."

Violet turned her head to the side inquisitively. "Looks narrow enough. You'd have something to hold onto."

"I know, right?" Addison reached forward to measure the distance. "My hips aren't even digging into the edge.

"It's the heels," Violet nodded.

"Sexy and practical."

Naomi just stared at them, "I'm adding 'no office sex' clauses to everyone's contracts."

"Okay!" Sam yelled uncomfortably. "Well. On that note, we're going to politely excuse ourselves from this conversation that has suddenly taken a more awkward turn. Pete, Coop… let's go."

The three men walked quickly from the kitchen as Addison, Violet, and Naomi burst into laughter.

Dell tentatively stuck his head into the kitchen. "Uh, your patients are here…" he told the three of them.

"Thanks, Dell," Naomi said between laughs. "Alright, we better go work, I suppose. Meet at your house at 7:00," she told Addison. "I'll bring booze."

XXXXXXXXXX

"_Hey," _he answered, tucking the phone between his ear and shoulder as he carried a stack of charts down the hall back to the nurses' station.

"I have some bad news."

He sighed._ "You're not coming." _It wasn't a question.

"I'm so sorry. You have no idea _how_ sorry."

"_Oh, I think I do."_

"I have to go to this two-day conference thing. Naomi signed us up for it weeks ago and conveniently forgot to tell me until this morning. I tried to get out of it, but she started bitching about how much it cost her for us to go. Believe me… I would much rather be spending that time with you."

"_It's okay," _he said grudgingly._ "I'll just… fish or something."_

"I'll be there next weekend. I promise."

"_Okay," he agreed. "But you'll have to make it up to me."_

"Oh, believe me," she teased. "I will."

XXXXXXXXXX

"It's a _really_ nice place, Cal," Addison said as she stood in the foyer of the empty house.

Callie and Teagan exchanged knowing glances.

"So you like it then?" Callie asked.

"Well, yeah," she replied. "Seems kind of big for just one person, though."

Callie shrugged. "I can't live in that apartment forever. Especially not after the baby gets here."

"What!" Addison exclaimed shrilly. "You're pregnant?!"

"Just found out yesterday," Callie grinned.

"Congratulations!" she said. "Does Mark… I mean… are you two…"

"I couldn't stay angry at him, no matter how hard I tried," Callie told her. "I'm in love with the idiot, God help me."

"I'm glad," Addison smiled. "Wow. So, how'd he take the news?"

"He fainted," Teagan interjected.

Addison looked at Callie. "Really?"

"I think he was still a little shaken up from before when that annoying, twitchy lady made her appearance," she said, trying to keep from sounding bitter. "But after the initial shock wore off, he was pretty damn happy."

"He'll be lucky if he makes it through her pregnancy in one piece," Teagan said.

"Why?"

"She's already flipped out on him. Twice."

Addison looked at Callie and raised an eyebrow.

"He was hovering," Callie said defensively. "I just needed my space."

Addison laughed. "So… when do you move in?"

Teagan looked curiously at Callie.

"Oh, um… not for a couple weeks. We're still waiting for, you know… paper work and stuff," Callie told her.

Addison eyed her curiously. "I thought you said when we got here that it was a done deal?"

"So, lunch?" Teagan changed the subject. "I'm hungry, and I'm sure Callie is, too. She _is_ eating for two."

"Oh, right. Yeah. Let's go," Addison said, leading the way to the car.

Teagan grabbed Callie's arm, stopping her. "Are you going to tell her?" she whispered.

"No," Callie hissed. "Not yet, anyway."

"Hey," Addison called. "You coming?"

"Coming," they yelled back in unison.

"Don't say anything," Callie insisted.

Teagan nodded but said, "She's gonna kill you."

XXXXXXXXXX

"_Addie, I'm really sorry. I don't know what else to say."_

"It's Valentine's Day, Derek. We're supposed to spend the weekend together."

"_I know. And I really am sorry, Add."_

"Valentine's Day," she repeated.

"_Yeah, I got it," _he sounded annoyed. _"Since when is it such a big deal? I thought you hated Valentine's Day."_

"It's the concept of it I hate," she clarified. "Not the fact that _should_ be getting to spend it with you."

"_I'm sorry," _he repeated._ "We'll do the whole Valentine's thing next time. Okay?"_

"I don't even care about the damn holiday, Derek," she spat, becoming more upset. "This is the _third_ time you've cancelled. In six weeks."

"_Correct me if I'm wrong," _he retorted,_ "but you've cancelled on me, too, you know."_

"Once, Derek," she corrected him. "And it was only because I _had_ to. I didn't _want_ to."

"_You don't think I _want_ to spend time with you?"_

She hesitated. "Sometimes I don't know."

"_Addison, come on."_

"If you were me, what would you think?"

"_That maybe this long-distance thing is hard on me, and maybe you should cut me some slack."_

"It's hard to me, too, Derek!" she exclaimed, trying not to cry. "You think it's easy being apart from you all the time?"

"_It was your choice! I wanted to be together. You're the one who wanted to live apart."_

"Well, forgive me if I wasn't willing to give up _everything_ again after only a week of being back with you. Especially with everything that happened before."

"_When _will _you be ready, Addison? Ever?"_

"I'm sick of this, Derek. I'm tired of fighting with you about the _same thing._"

"_So am I."_

There was a long silence before either of them spoke again.

"I can't do this anymore," Addison whispered as she wiped the tears off her cheeks.

"_Addison, no," _he begged.

"I can't. We've tried and tried for almost two months, now. And it's not working. Something has to change. I can't do this anymore."

"_Addie…"_

"Just… I've gotta go."

* * *

Well. Wasn't that fun?

I'm sure you all have something to say about that.

Review.


	18. Couldn't Last a Moment Without You

Alright. I realize it's been a retardedly long time since I updated. I blame school. And laziness.

Anyway, here it is. We're nearing the end…

Read.

* * *

_**Chapter 18  
**__**Couldn't Last a Moment Without You**_

"Okay," Cooper whispered to the group. "When she comes in, Pete and I will grab her, and Violet, you shove one of those happy pills you like to prescribe down her throat."

"That's not exactly what I meant when I said we needed to do something," Naomi pointed out.

"I don't care. She's been completely miserable for the past week and snapping everybody's head off," Cooper whined. "It has to stop, or I will not be responsible for my actions."

"She's going through a rough time," Violet sympathized.

"Yeah, remember when what's-her-face ran out in you in the middle of sex?" Pete asked, smirking slightly. "What was her name? Missy? Mindy?"

"Maria," Sam supplied.

"Right."

"Oh, Maria…" Cooper said dreamily.

"You were _horrible_ after that," Naomi remembered. "Mopey and whiney..."

Cooper shook his head. "No, not the same thing," he argued. "We had a _connection_."

Everyone groaned and rolled their eyes.

"Your 'connection' was a mutual fetish for dirty sex and huge amounts of Jose Cuervo," Violet scoffed. "Not even close to what she's dealing with."

Cooper gave her a look and was about to rebuttal, but he was cut off by Sam before he had a chance.

"Okay, enough, children. Now, seriously, what are we going to do about her?"

"I vote that Naomi talks to her," Violet suggested.

"Me? Why? What did I ever to do you?"

"You're closest to her," Sam pointed out.

"You're not far behind," she shot back. "Okay, rock-paper-scissors to see who has to talk to her."

Just then the door opened. "What's going on?" Addison asked. "I thought we didn't have a meeting this morning."

Everyone looked around nervously, afraid of whatever form of verbal abuse Addison might throw at them today.

"We were just… hanging out… no big deal," Cooper stuttered.

Addison eyed him suspiciously, not believing him, but her phone rang before she could say anything.

"Hello?" she snapped into the phone, walking out of the room to her office.

Her colleagues let out a collective sigh of relief.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Hey," Mark greeted Derek, setting his tray down on the table and pulling up a chair next to him. "You okay?"

Derek shrugged.

"Call her."

"I can't. I got my second chance, and I blew it. She doesn't want to talk to me."

"Then what do you have to lose?" Mark made a good point. "Call her and beg her to forgive you. Do whatever you have to do."

"She wants me to move, Mark."

"She does?" he asked. "Or you _think_ she does?"

Derek didn't answer.

"Okay, look. The way I see it is that she gave up pretty much everything because you asked her to. She didn't want to leave New York or her practice or her family. But she did. So now it kind of seems like…"

"It's my turn," Derek finished. "I'm an ass."

Mark laughed. "You're not as big of an ass as you think you are. You forgave me, didn't you?"

"You don't think it's too late with Addison?" Derek asked again for reassurance.

Mark shrugged. "You'll never know until you try."

"So… I'll go call her then…?"

"Go," Mark said, giving him a friendly shove.

Derek walked to the nearest on-call room and closed the door, sitting down on the bottom bunk and pulling out his phone. He dialed her number, and it rang four times before going to voicemail.

"Addie, it's me. I… I don't even know where to start. I just miss you so much, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I have to apologize to you again because I've been doing it a lot lately, and I'm afraid that it's not going to have any meaning here soon. But I am sorry, so sorry, and I swear I'll do whatever it takes to be with you. Anything. You say the word, and I'm there. Please… just call me back. I love you."

He hung up the phone and rested his elbows on his knees, placing his face in hands.

"Derek?"

He looked up at the sound of Meredith's voice but didn't say anything.

"You really love her, don't you?"

He nodded sadly.

"So… I guess this means you and I are _really_…"

He nodded. "I'm sorry, Meredith."

Meredith shrugged, trying her hardest not to cry. "It's okay," she told him, not meeting his eyes. "I think I always knew deep down that we ultimately weren't meant to be. I just didn't want to admit it to myself."

"You are a very special person, Mer… I know how condescending that sounds, but I just think you should know."

Meredith nodded, swiping away a tear rolling down her cheek.

"You going to be okay?" he asked her.

"Yeah," she answered, managing to force a small smile. "It'll just take some time."

He nodded understandably as his pager began to beep.

"I gotta take this," he said apologetically.

She nodded. He gave her a tiny smile and squeezed her arm softly on his way out.

XXXXXXXXXX

Addison was sitting on her couch, absently staring at the TV and nursing a glass of wine. She'd been there for a good two hours, at least, though it only felt like a few minutes.

She'd been thinking about everything that had led her to this point in her life. The point where she wasn't sure anymore if she would ever be truly happy again. Moving here was supposed to make things better. 

It was supposed to be her sanctuary, her refuge from everything she'd done wrong in New York and Seattle. Instead, she was left with more hurt and heartache than before.

The sound of the phone ringing next to her brought her back to reality. She looked at the caller ID and considered not answering… but she really didn't have any reason not to, and she knew the person on the other end wouldn't stop calling until she picked up. So she sighed and flipped open her phone.

"Hey."

"Hi, sissy," Teagan said. "Is this a bad time?"

"No."

"Good. So…" Teagan began.

"You want to know if I'm okay, don't you?" Addison sighed. She was definitely _not_ in the mood to talk about Derek or discuss her feelings, even though Violet kept insisting that talking about her feelings would help her "heal." Addison thought she had never heard a bigger load of crap in her life.

"I'm just worried about you," Teagan said gently. "I've seen Derek a couple times since everything happened, and he's miserable. And I kinda think that you aren't much better."

"I don't know what I am anymore," Addison shrugged and snuggled down into the couch, wrapping the red cashmere blanket tighter around her. "I don't really wanna talk about it. How've you been?"

Teagan decided to let it go. "Good… busy. I have to take a full load of classes this quarter and next if I want to graduate this year, so that's a little stressful. Not to mention Brian…"

"Is he still hanging around?"

Teagan nodded. "He is being really sweet… bringing me random meals, making sure I get home safe when I have night classes…"

"But…" Addison prodded.

"But… I don't know if I can forgive him for what he did. He ran out on me while I was pregnant, Addie. And I get that he was scared and he panicked, but I was scared, too. And even though he's apologized again and again, I don't know that I can trust him again."

Addison could hear the confliction in her sister's voice and the familiarity in her words. It sounded remarkably similar to something Addison herself would have said. And that bothered her. She didn't want her sister ending up like her. "I can't say that I blame you…" she admitted, "but he sounds pretty sincere to me, Teag. I don't think he would still be around if he wasn't. We all make mistakes when we're scared or desperate. He moved all the way across the country for you. And everyone deserves a second chance. Maybe you should just think about it…"

"I've considered it…" Teagan admitted.

"Good," Addison smiled.

"Hey, Add?"

"Yeah?"

"Did you ever think that maybe you should take your own advice."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Hey," Cooper greeted, poking his head into Violet's office. "I'm headed out. You need anything?"

Violet smiled half-heartedly. "No. Thanks."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing… just sad."

Cooper nervously fidgeted with the coat in his hand. "Wanna talk about it?"

"That's okay, Coop. I'm fine."

"No, really," he insisted. "I'm not Naomi, but I'm a pretty good listener."

"You don't want to hear about my pathetic life."

He avoided her eyes. "Yeah, I do."

"Why the sudden interest?"

"It's not sudden, Vi," he said nervously, shuffling his feet. "I've always cared about you."

The real meaning of his words was lost on her. "Well, I care about you, too."

"No. I _care_ about you," he stressed.

"Oh." Light bulb.

"And now I've said too much… so I think I'll be going."

"Coop, wait," Violet stood and walked around the side of her desk. "Did you mean that?"

"Well, yeah," he blurted out. "I mean… I care about you a normal amount…"

"Stop," she ordered. She stood and walked around the side of her desk as he watched curiously. She stopped next to him and looked at him before pressing her lips to his and wrapping her arms around his neck.

"What's wrong?" she pulled away. "Why aren't you kissing me back?"

"I don't want to do it like this," he said gently, putting some space between the two of them.

"Like what?"

"Like I do with every other woman. I wanna do it differently with you. I want to take you out to a nice dinner and go for a walk on the beach and then drive you home and make you wonder whether or not I'm going to kiss you goodnight. I want to take it slow."

Violet smiled and blushed slightly. "Okay."

"Okay?" he repeated. "Okay. So…"

"Tomorrow," she said firmly. "7:00. Don't be late."

XXXXXXXXXX

Monday was unusually busy, and Addison was grateful for that. Anything to keep her mind off Derek was good in her book. She'd already dealt with three pregnant women this morning and had done a few routine check-ups in addition to supervising another one of Dell's self-described "happy paps." She really had to get him to stop calling referring to them that way. He was scaring the patients. And her. No one needed to be _that_ enthusiastic while performing _that_ particular exam.

Either way, the morning had gone by quickly. But now she was on her lunch break. It was harder to focus on other people's issues instead of her own.

All weekend she'd been debating back and forth whether breaking it off with Derek was the right decision. Because so far, it hadn't made her life any easier. Not that her life was ever easy when it came to Derek Shepherd.

Outside her office, she watched as Sam walked up to Naomi and handed her a box of take-out for lunch. She looked at him, smiling softly, and he kissed her forehead before they parted ways.

A little while later, Addison rose and made her way to Naomi's office, closing the door behind her and sitting down in one of the chairs in front of her desk.

"How did you know that getting back together with Sam was the right decision?"

"What?" Naomi was thrown off by her friend's bluntness.

"How did you know? I mean, people get divorced for a reason, right? Most of the time, they shouldn't be together anymore," Addison rambled. "Or maybe they shouldn't have been together in the first place. I don't know… but the feelings don't go away. A divorce doesn't take away everything you feel for a person. But that's not enough. You have to work at it, both of you. If both people are committed, it's just going to hurt all over again. So how did you know?"

Naomi looked at her best friend sympathetically. "I didn't," she finally admitted. "I just knew that I would never be happy _without_ him. I'm not saying we don't have to work at it. He is infuriating sometimes, and he never does the dishes or matches his socks or cleans the bathroom… we work hard at it. Some days we work _really_ hard. But I love him. I guess that's really all there is to it."

Addison was quiet.

"Addie? You okay?"

She nodded. "I think… I think I want to go home," she finally confessed.

"Really?"

"Yes," she said firmly.

Naomi smiled and nodded. "So… when…?"

"A couple days."

Naomi fidgeted with a pen on her desk. "I'll miss you, Addie."

Addison smiled sadly at her friend. "I'll come visit," she promised. "Twice a year."

"I'm holding you to that."

Addison laughed and looked at her friend. "Thank you."

"You tell him he better take care of you this time," she threatened. "There's a lot less of the country separating me from kicking his ass now."

"I'll make sure he gets the message," Addison smiled.

"Alright, get outta here before you make me start crying," Naomi ordered.

The two women stood, and Addison walked over and hugged her friend. "Love you, Nae."

Naomi mumbled something in response, trying to keep herself from bursting into tears. Addison walked quickly back to her office with a huge grin plastered on her face and picked up her cell phone, quickly punching in the familiar digits.

"Hello?" a grumpy voice answered.

"I'm coming home."

"You better not be lying to me, Montgomery," Callie threatened. "I'm hormonal and irrational, and there's no telling what I'll do if I'm provoked."

"No lie," she promised. "I've gotta pack my things and then I'm on my way."

"Does Derek know?"

"No. And I'd like to keep it that way until I figure out what I'm going to do."

"Mmmhmm," Callie replied, her mouth clearly full of food.

"So I was thinking I could come to your house once I got there, and we could figure something out."

"Oh… you want to come to the house?"

Addison scrunched up her forehead, slightly confused. "Yes… why? Is that not okay?"

"No, it's fine. It's just… it's kind of messy right now since we're still in the process of moving in and everything."

"I don't really care, Cal. I didn't unpack for three weeks after I moved here."

"Are you sure?" Callie kept trying to talk her out of it. "I mean… it's messy and dirty…"

"Okay, Callie. What's going on? You're being really weird, and I know it's not just your hormones."

Callie sighed heavily into the phone. "I think I should probably tell you something…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"You told her about the house?" Mark asked as they were lying in bed that night.

Callie groaned. "I had to," she insisted, shifting onto her back and rearranging her pillows. "She kept asking to come over to the house. I think she probably would have figured it out when she showed up and we weren't there."

Mark shook his head. "Derek specifically asked us not to say anything."

"Well, I made an executive decision and decided it was okay," Callie said, her voice getting tense. "Do you really want to spend more time arguing about it?"

"No," he answered quickly, not wanting to provoke Callie and her off-the-wall emotions.

"Do you think she's making the right decision?" Callie asked softly a few minutes later.

"I don't know," Mark admitted, turning away from Callie to lie on his back as well. "But I can't take either one of them being as miserable and depressing as they have been lately."

"You know… I was thinking… that house down the street from Derek's is for sale…"

He turned back to face her. "Yeah?"

"Yeah," Callie smiled.

"They fight loudly…" Mark warned. "And do other things loudly. You sure you want to live that close to that?"

Callie giggled. "I want Baby to grow up near its godparents."

"Speaking of Baby," Mark grinned, "I've been thinking of names"

She was surprised. "Already?"

"Why not?"

She kissed him lightly. "What names?"

"Well… I was kinda thinking of Christopher for a boy…"

"Christopher?" Called scrunched up her forehead, not sure about the name.

"It's Derek's middle name," Mark explained.

"Oh… well, it's definitely a consideration then," she conceded. "What else?"

"For girls, I was thinking about Camry, Carrington, Brooklynn," he rattled off.

"I'm sorry," she interrupted. "Camry? Like the car?"

Mark shrugged. "It's pretty."

"My child is not being named after a Toyota," Callie vetoed the name. "What about… Carmen?"

"Carmen…"

"My grandmother's name," she explained.

"I like it," Mark decided, smiling broadly. "Carmen. That's her name. Isn't it, baby girl?" he said, rubbing her stomach affectionately.

Callie rolled over on her side, propping her head up with the palm of her hand. "Don't get too attached to the name. What if it's a boy? You'll give him a complex before he's even born."

He shook his head. "No," he said firmly. "It's a girl. I have a feeling."

"We'll see," she said with a roll of her eyes.

"Yes, you will," he grinned, moving closer to her and kissing her lips. "You will see that I am right."

"Oh, really?" she grinned.

"Yeah," he kissed her again. "Really."

XXXXXXXXXX

Addison walked into her closet and grabbed another armful of clothes from the racks. She went back into her room and threw them on her bed. Reaching for the garment bag on the floor, she spread it out next to the clothing, separating out her fancy dresses and expensive pantsuits from the other clothing that she would pack in one of her suitcases.

She'd already packed most of her clothing, her shoes, and other essentials she'd be taking with her. The rest of her things would be sent later in the week.

She surveyed the room, and though she couldn't help feeling just a little nostalgic about leaving the beach and the sunshine and her best friend, she knew in her heart that this was the right move. She smiled contently as she continued folding her clothes.

The sound of the doorbell startled her out of her reverie, and she set the pants aside that she'd been folding.

"Hold on," she shouted as she descended the stairs. "I'm coming."

She wasn't really sure who was at her door at 11:00 at night. Naomi had told her that she had plans with Sam that evening, and Violet would never come by without calling first. And that was about the extent of her friends in L.A., so she didn't know who to expect on the other side of the door.

She opened the door and stood in shock. She most definitely wasn't expecting him.

Derek smiled at her as she continued to stare in disbelief. "Hey there," he greeted.

She still said nothing.

"Can I come in?" he asked.

She nodded, standing aside to let him through. It was then that she noticed the two suitcases he drug along with him.

"What's going on?" she finally asked.

"Can we sit?" he pointed to the living room.

Addison nodded and led the way into the other room, seating herself on one end of the couch while Derek occupied the other. She hugged a throw pillow protectively to her chest as she faced him.

"Why are you here, Derek?" she asked again.

"Because I love you," he stated simply. "And because I'm miserable without you. And because Mark finally talked some sense to me."

She looked at him skeptically. "_Mark_ talked some sense into you?"

He nodded. "He made me realize how much you have already given up for us. Addie, you gave up your job, your family, your entire life, and moved to Seattle for me. And I took that for granted. I pushed you away. Then I was lucky enough to get you back again, and I messed it up. I'm not doing that again."

She brushed away a tear that had rolled down her cheek. "So you're saying…"

"I'm moving here. That is, if you'll take me back. Again. All I care about is being with you."

"You're serious?"

"Completely," he assured her. "No more messing this up."

He leaned forward and captured her lips in his, kissing her slowly and deeply.

Addison smiled uncontrollably as he slowly pulled away. "But what about the house?"

"You know about that?"

"Yeah," she admitted.

He shook his head. "I don't care about the house, Add. I can sell it. We can live here. I want to be wherever you are."

She smiled as she looked him in the eye, seeing the look in his eyes that told her that he genuinely meant what he was saying. "What if I like the house?" she asked slowly.

Derek looked confused as he processed her words. He looked away from her and for the first time noticed the boxes that were stacked next to the stairs. He looked back at her quizzically.

"It was supposed to be a surprise," she told him. "But you kinda beat me to the punch."

"You want to move back to Seattle?" he asked astonished.

She shrugged. "It has its perks," she admitted.

"But you _hate_ Seattle."

"Not anymore," she shook her head. "I know how much you love it… and I know how much I miss the hospital. I even miss Mark. And I'm ready to come home."

He smiled and gathered her into his arms, pulling her onto his lap and kissing her. She wrapped her arms around his neck as she kissed him back.

"I love you," he murmured against her lips.

"I love you more."

"Not possible."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Good morning, Richard," Patricia greeted the chief. "There are some papers on your desk that need your signature, and I pushed back your 9:00 meeting until 11:00."

He gave her a look. "Why'd you do that?"

Patricia nodded toward his office. "You'll see…"

Richard walked to the door of his office and pushed the door open, doing a double-take when he saw who was waiting for him.

"Hi, Richard," Addison greeted him cheerfully, standing up from her position on his couch to hug him.

"Addison," he said as he awkwardly hugged her back. "Not that I'm not happy to see you, but what are you doing here?"

Derek walked up beside her and wrapped his arm around Addison's waist, smiling broadly at his boss all the while.

"Oh… oh!" he said excitedly, finally putting the pieces together.

"So…" Addison grinned. "That job still available?"

* * *

Okay, you review. Now.


	19. No Other Love

Here it is. Last chapter. Yay!

Thanks for reading and reviewing throughout the story. I'm glad you guys have enjoyed it.

So… here you go. One final (short) chapter.

* * *

_**Chapter 19  
**__**No Other Love**_

_Two years later…_

"You got the plane tickets?" Addison asked for the third time, running through the mental list of everything they needed to take with them. They were supposed to leave for the airport in less than 20 minutes.

"Right here on the table," Derek called back from the kitchen. He glanced at the clock on the wall. "Addison, we need to get going. Are you almost ready?"

Addison sighed and shook her head in the bedroom. "Almost. I just have a few last-minute things to pack," she said vaguely. She continued tossing the clothes she had flung on the bed into the open suitcase on the floor. "What about your clothes for the wedding? Are you sure you packed the light khaki pants and not the darker ones?"

"Yes, I have them," he nodded to himself. "Addison, seriously, what else could possibly have left to pack? You already have a carry-on full of shoes," Derek pointed out as she wheeled out her second suitcase. "And now two suitcases. You are aware that we're only going for five days, right?"

"It's not all mine, you know," she smiled. "Half of this one is for Colby. I want her to look adorable for the wedding." She reached down and rubbed her finger over the sleeping baby's cheek.

"I still think it's ridiculous that we had to buy an extra seat for a three-month-old," Derek complained. "She's essentially another carry-on."

"Okay, one," Addison held up a finger, "do not refer to our daughter as a carry-on. And two: after everything we went through to get her, she's going to be strapped in that seat as tight as possible, not doing acrobatics through the cabin of the plane."

Derek laughed softly and kissed her softly. She smiled against his lips and wrapped her arms around his neck.

They were interrupted as the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it," Addison said, kissing him once more before walking toward the front door. "Hey, guys," she greeted Mark and Callie.

"Your happy house-sitters are here," Callie announced, walking into the entry way balancing the baby on her hip. Mark followed behind her with their bags. "Thanks again for letting us stay here while you're gone. I don't know how much more noise I could stand."

"_You're_ the one who wanted to add onto the house," Mark reminded her. "Don't get blame the contractors."

Addison laughed at their bickering and took the squirming baby out of Callie's arms. "Hey, little man," she cooed. "You're getting big, you know that?"

Christopher made a gurgling noise as he stared up at Addison, sucking on his fingers.

"He's a handful, too, now that he's walking," Callie said. "And _your friend_ here," she pointed to Mark, "wants another one."

Mark shrugged. "I always wanted a big family," he said defensively. "And besides, Chris needs a sibling to torture."

"Says the one who doesn't have to grow as big as a house and then endure hours upon hours of pain that ends with you pushing the thing out of your vagina," Callie rolled her eyes, pretending to be annoyed despite the smile on her face.

Derek appeared from the kitchen, pulling a rolling suitcase with one hand and holding Colby's baby carrier in the other.

"Hey!" he greeted his friends, setting the baby carrier on the ground.

Callie immediately bent down and started murmuring softly to Colby with a goofy grin on her face.

"See," Mark said quietly to Addison. "She totally wants another one. She just wants it to be _her_ idea."

"I can hear you," Callie informed him.

"Alright, so, you guys better get going," Mark said. "Don't worry, your house will still be standing when you get back."

Addison nodded and picked up the baby carrier and her purse. "Good to know."

"Have a good time," Callie said.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Dance with me?" Derek grinned down at her and held out his hand. She smiled in return and took his hand, letting him pull her up from her seat and lead her out on the dance floor.

He pulled her close, wrapping his arm tight around her waist. She rested her cheek against his as they swayed back and forth to the music.

"It's not fair for you to look more beautiful than the bride," Derek whispered in her ear.

Addison giggled and wrapped her arm tighter around him, running her fingers softly through the hair on the back of his head.

"They look happy, don't they?" she mused, watching Violet and Cooper dancing and laughing on the other side of the dance floor.

"Yeah, they do."

"Do you ever think… maybe… that we should get married again?" Addison asked slowly.

Derek pulled back slightly and looked at her. "I thought you didn't want to."

"I wasn't ready before," Addison explained. "I didn't want to be legally bound by a piece of paper. I wanted to be with you because I _chose_ to. Because _we_ chose to. But now…"

Derek smiled. "It just feels right," he finished her sentence.

"Yeah," she agreed and rested her head on his shoulder as he gently rubbed her back.

"How about the end of the summer?" he suggested. "Back east… just family… and then we can spend a week at the Hamptons. My mom would be more than happy to watch Colby."

"Sounds perfect," she smiled. "So… we're getting married…"

He pulled back and put a hand on her cheek, pulling her face to his and kissing her slowly and deeply.

"We're getting married."

* * *

That's all, folks.

Review one last time and tell me how much you love me for giving you a happy Addek ending.


End file.
